Cultivating Grace

Posted by judimahoney @judimahoney, Jun 3 12:54am

Hello group:
Someone on Facebook posted this piece, and I felt it related well to our struggles, and I do struggle to be graceful:
Cultivating Grace
Understanding that a person's behavior often stems from their internal struggles rather than being a direct reflection of you is a profound realization that leads to the cultivation of grace. It's an acknowledgment that each individual carries their own unique set of experiences, wounds, and challenges that shape how they navigate the world.
When someone behaves in a way that is hurtful, dismissive, or erratic, it's easy to internalize their actions and perceive them as a personal attack. However, when we step back and recognize that their behavior is likely a manifestation of their inner turmoil, it changes the narrative. Instead of taking their actions personally, we have the opportunity to either leave them along with their toxic behaviours, or approach the situation with empathy and understanding.
This shift in perspective allows us to respond with grace rather than defensiveness or anger. Grace is the ability to extend kindness, forgiveness, and compassion even in the face of adversity. It's choosing to respond with patience and understanding rather than retaliation or judgment.
Learning to offer grace requires humility and self-awareness. It means recognizing our own limitations and imperfections while also acknowledging that others are navigating their own struggles. By embracing grace, we create space for healing and growth, both within ourselves and in our relationships with others.
Moreover, extending grace doesn't mean excusing harmful behavior or allowing ourselves to be mistreated. It means setting boundaries, prioritizing our well-being, and responding with empathy rather than resentment. It's about recognizing that everyone is fighting their own battles and choosing to respond with love and understanding rather than adding to their burdens.
Ultimately, learning grace is a transformative journey that leads to greater compassion, connection, and inner peace. It allows us to release the weight of carrying others' actions as a personal burden and instead approach life with openness and kindness. By embracing grace, we create a world where understanding and empathy prevail, fostering deeper relationships and a more harmonious existence.

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@judimahoney Very thoughtful posting, Judi. Have you been working on learning grace? How is it working for you?


Hi Becky:
It's harder than I thought. I try to remember how patient I was with our children, and channel that when I get frustrated. I strive to breathe and focus when it's hard, and remind myself my husband is not behaving a certain way on purpose.
This will be a lifetime struggle, I think, maintaining grace in the face of adversity.
Thanks for checking in with me. 🙂


Thank you very much for sharing that! As my husband's support person, I needed to read this and will share it with him. He's so forgiving and patient with me. I will reflect on it during my Time Alone with God--when I sit at church on Fridays in a space with a wall of windows looking at distant hills and the sky.


Sounds like my wife is further along than your husband but I share your thoughts. I know she loves me but she gets very frustrated and needs to release that frustration on someone and since I'm with her 24/7, I get that release. however, it does hurt when she wakes up in the middle of the night asking "who are you and where is my husband?".

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