Ashamed: I think about (and plan for) dying. Do you?

Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. Wow, you are incredible!! I'm 75 and have had cancer since 1977 and I need to touch you- it's supposed to be lucky! I have also done all of the "necessary preparations" to make it easier for my family should I die before they do. I'm so damn picky!

Would you feel comfortable telling a bit more about your journey and how you have been able to not be consumed with dying?

Hello Merry....at our age death is always on the horizon and when I got the diagnosis May 2016 I stuck to the one day at a time way of thinking but decided to take charge of those things I could in my life....legacies, finances, wills , staying physically active etc and it made me feel maybe I could beat the beast. I had surgery, half my left lung removed, found more cancer when closing me up which put me into stage IV. Moffitt then sent my tissue samples to the pathology specialist Foundation One medicine in Cambridge and discovered my tumors had the rare Exon 14 gene mutation and I qualified for Xalkori, a targeted therapy (2 pills a day) which I am still on. I have some other health issues...(who doesn't approaching 80?) but plunge on.....that's my story. I have to say staying physically active (daily zumba) and a lovely husband are part of my story. I think they keep the grim reaper at bay. Hope this is helpful information. Dede

Good morning Dede- Thank you for sharing your story. I am a cheerleader for being in charge as much as possible. Education is power. It's essential to know what is going on and understand it. It lessens anxiety and allows for being a better patient.

There's nothing like a surprise. Like you, my surgeon at MGH found three tumors instead of 2 in my left upper lobe and had to switch from using his robotic arms to open chest surgery. This was 10 years after my first one (but a different kind).

The medical world can be very confusing and scary. Taking one step at a time, I think, gives time to grasp and understand more. It lessens the chance of misunderstanding. You have a great way of expressing yourself after such a whirlwind experience yourself!

Again, thank you for telling your story. Survivors are angles of hope! Don't you think?

I have done my obituary and shown where I keep it hard copy and in Word. Only thing needed is the final date.

Me too🙏🏻

I agree!

Hello- How are you? I've missed you!

I haven't gone that far!

It’s a word.doc. Family can edit as they choose🤣😁😱

Yes. It's only natural if you're handed a terminal diagnosis. It doesn't mean you have given up. I want my ducks in a row for the sake of my family. Only God knows how long we have but if being prepared means peace of mind, go for it.