Appropriate Cards and Gifts

Not for PC in particular, but the best gift I received when going through treatment was a gift card for Uber to get me to and from treatment. I was being treated out of town so had to Uber/Lyft to appointments from the condo I rented; so this was really appreciated.

@ldrlaw

Been thinking about your question for a day. My mother had PC and I have had breast cancer. Trying to recall what was most appreciated.

Gift cards like Starbucks, delivery services for meals (like Door Dash), gas gift cards, etc… There are so many additional expenses that occur that medical insurance does not cover.

Maybe a spa gift card for a pedicure or manicure if cousins would enjoy something like that. Even better, if live close go with her.

Stay away from lotion or other products with scents. Many cancer patients become very sensitive to
fragrances. But a lotion that has no fragrances might be appreciated.

Many people offer to help, but often the patient never asks. Instead of telling them to call if need anything, be direct and tell them you're going to bring them a meal, ask what they want and on what day. And then follow up.

I hope you have a nice luncheon and are able to talk about fun times. Do you have some topics to discuss that do not involve PC, memories of when you were kids, etc...

I really appreciate what you said about rather than saying “Let me know if I can help.” that people just do it. I have a really, really difficult time asking for help. I’ve talked to other people with cancer who say the same. Boy would it be wonderful if family and friends just showed up and said “OK. I’m here to help. Let’s get something you need help with done.”

I was thinking about people offering to help lately. I know I can call a couple of girlfriends but would I?probably not unless a dire emergency. My neighbors always say don’t forget anything you need, yet only one person has given me their phone number and that is the neigbor who’s husband has terminal stomach cancer. I agree with Jo. I always try to send cards of encouragement or humorous cards or fruit or chocolate delivery from Harry and David. Have a good time with your family and reminisce of the past times.

My sister did something similar that I found SUPER helpful. She would instruct me to go out and get a nice dinner or something else (it was my husband that had cancer) and then to tell her how much it was. She would then PayPal me the money. This worked for me because I did not even have to keep track of a gift card. It was very appreciated.

Good idea. Thanks for taking the time to share it. Vicki

Sometimes the simplest things get away from us. As an active cancer patient, there are some routine chores that have gotten away from me. While I would love to be able to get outside and weed my flower beds, and continue working on some projects outside, my energy is zapped by chemo and the warm weather.

What would be a blessing is to see someone show up on my doorstep, gardening gloves on, gardening utensils in hand with a bucket, asking, "which area do you want me to start on first?" To look out the window and not see weeds waving in the breeze would be appreciated! I'd be happy to supply cold water or lemonade!
Ginger

Thanks, Jean. My sister's appetite leaned towards cool, fruity things. Small batches of fresh fruit sounds especially nice. Of course, I'd prefer the chocolate!

Your comment about your neighbor who has stomach cancer reminds me of one of my dear friends. She's struggling with metastasized liver cancer and always asks if she can help me! Vicki

Yes, Ginger, that is a wonderful, helpful gift. I did that for one of my friends and she was so grateful. Vicki

The gift of time! Spend some time with the people, making them feel loved and appreciated. Has a great side benefit of giving their caretaker a break also.

When I was in the midst of cancer treatments, I knew how difficult it was for my wife. Looking back, I had no idea the pressure she had on her, from taking care of me and herself to dealing with her fears.