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96 YO Mother fall questions
Hello and thank you for reading this message. Mom is in unusually good shape for her age. She's had a few falls over the last five years but has been very fortunate to really only have had some stitches and a couple bruises. She has started to walk with a cane but mostly walks around the house holding on to furniture, walls etc. Most of the house (she lives alone in her home), has no steps or tripping hazards. She stills drives regularly to PT, hairdresser and local store. She's been taking supplements for decades and takes BP and Thyroid meds for about ten years. She has a pacemaker. She cooks and eats a healthy diet. She had a minor stroke over ten years ago with no after effects. She's recently had issues with itching and dry skin and scalp. All in all she's amazing. A couple days ago she called and asked my wife and I to come help her get up from a fall in her kitchen.
We found her sitting on a hard tiled floor without any apparent injuries. There was a chair knocked over and some other things on the floor as she appeared to have been reaching for things. She weighs 97 lbs and it took all had to get her up without hurting her. I asked her what happened and she said she was standing at the table reading the mail and suddenly lost her balance and went straight down without hitting her head or anything else but she couldn't pick her self up. Most of the house is carpeted and a lot has throw rugs. She refuses to remove them. I think she likes the extra padding because she's fallen without having to tell us. I took the opportunity to address a number of falling while alone issues for the hundredth time. In the past I've noticed her balance has been getting worse and she refuses to use on of the several walkers around the house. I could go on about her risky lifestyle but why? Any suggestions to get her to carry one of the many phones at all times? And when should she be in assisted living before she falls and can't get up until I discover her unable to call for help?
Thanks again for reading.
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@gently, Bigger fish to fry. Just left the hospital. Mom's heart failure is progressing. She stopped taking her water pill. Doc says she should be okay but she may need rehab stay after the treatment. This will be interesting how she gets evaluated.
We were out of town when she called my wife asking for advice and she told her to call 911. I called her back a few minutes later and she was confused. I yelled call 911 three times. Her neighbor call us and said the ambulance was there a few minutes later. Great fellow who just lost his own mother recently.
@renee17, It's almost impossible to know when to back off. I've had that situation this past week. She was telling us her breathing was a little difficult. I asked her all the usual questions thinking possible heart failure. She told me she was okay and I reminded her to call 911 if she felt typical heart attack symptoms. We've been through these many times. About three months ago she called 911 when her BP spiked. I praised her for her action instead of calling me. So today she called my wife while we were out, complaining of difficulty breathing. My wife told her to call 911. I waited a few minutes, called her back and she hadn't called 911. In fact she was beginning to sound confused. About ten minutes later, her neighbor called us and said the ambulance was there.
She's doing well tonight. I won't say what she said when we got to the hospital but I think she's beginning to accept the idea that she can die. The ball was in her court and she chose 911. If she hadn't I was going to call 911 but she doesn't know it.
So yes, it's very hard to intervene. If they die because you didn't, I think you know how you'll feel forever.
Woojr, prayers for your mom.
I've so enjoyed your spirited posts about her. She just may charm her way out of rehab.
Thank goodness you and your wife are on call, even when you're out of town.