Psychotherapy advice

I think of therapy as cleaning house. I had to discover the dirt. It was embarrassing (which is a form of fear) to be so vulnerable. And I had to cry. And I found out that tears are really good at cleaning. Hang in there, and go at your own pace.

Thanks so much for your kind words-greatly appreciated. I worry about these things running in my family. My sister who is 12 years older than me is a manic depressive in a nursing home. I understand that my Grandfather died (before I was born) from depression related illness. Sometimes I get aggregated having to take my 20 mg Lexapro daily (at 8am-UG). I have never taken these pills before. I started taking them last December so it has been 8 months. I am not a pill taker by trait and I am finding that these Lexapro cause me emotional blunting. I feel a little numb to things that I used to enjoy. I guess with every pill one takes there are some side effects. I have moved a few times in hopes that it would help with my anxiety and depression but have found that is something that no matter where you live, it doesn’t matter, you need to work on it. My dad also suffered from depression as not many people knew about it and he always seemed to disguise it well.

Great advice given , however, Do not forget to include EXERCISE!!! In someways best medicine of all at it increases endorphins in the brain.

If you find you are slipping into a fog from meditation tell your doctor. I have Bipolar 1 and I remember Lexipo. Keep in mind I am only saying this so you can get another opinion. When I was taking Lexipro it would put me into mania. When I’m in the terrible depression I would beg for Lexipro. After a couple of times he stopped prescribing it

Swimming and water aerobics work wonders. Even just walking in the pool for 30 mins helps. I love my water exercise!!!

@adelheid61 I find psychotherapy is a great means of support that I need in my everyday life. I have received it for over fifty years. With the support and encouragement of psychologists and social workers, I have persevered through many hardships and accomplished great goals. I highly recommend that you stick with it. You will be amazed at what a difference psychotherapy can do for you.

@lsittl

Yes I agree with you that talking about things in the past can be both difficult and freeing. I remember that the first time I told someone about a rather traumatic event (which I thought I had come to terms with), I surprised myself when I started to cry. I think crying can be good for us, after all there must be a reason we do it, like sleeping-- it must be something we need.

In addition, I feel sure there are genetic mental health issues in my own family tree, even though they were mostly not diagnosed, because people didn't used to talk about those things-- anxiety, depression, mania, and other issues like ASD and PMDD. Looking back, I think probably my gandparents and other relatives suffered from these things without any treatment or help.

I'm so grateful to live in a time when we know more and have more openness about these very real conditions.

I agree that in the past people didn’t talk much about mental issues or even have admitted to having these problems. My older sister has manic depression and refused to take meds at one point. Now she is under care in a nursing home. My Grandfather (who died before I was born) had some depression etc, and died when my dad was five. My dad never shared details with the family but it was sad just the same. My Dad also had some form of depression. I don’t think he took any medication at the time though and maybe disguised it well.
It does feel good, I find to let things off your chest. After my first therapy visit I shared a situation from my marriage that effected my family adversely from years ago. After talking about it, I felt relieved, but almost raw later after I let it off my chest. The term my therapist mentioned was “flooding” when you talk to a stranger where these old feelings will spike and then subside. Another term he mentioned was catharsis.
My focus is to learn coping skills for my anxiety and to be able to adapt to situations. We have an almost theee year old gsd doggie. I worry about her as she has some separation anxiety and barks when hubby exits the car to get gas. We take her everywhere. Are you taking any medications? Are you going for therapy? Happy you were able to cry and let things out. Thanks for sharing your experience. I enclosed a pic of Ms. Xyla.

I know this thread is a few months old, but if I may, here are some important things I've learned from years of therapy:

Healing begins with forgiveness:
Forgiveness of self. I'm not perfect, I was never perfect, I will never be perfect. Mistakes are a part of life. Learn from them, and move on. Be compassionate with yourself.
Forgiveness of others. Most meant no harm; they are imperfect too. The malicious ones...well, my stewing over it won't change them.

Worrying is (mostly) pointless. Have reasonable concern, then let it go. For example, check your tires before a road trip, but don't spend every hour on the road worrying about getting a flat. Which leads me to...

Humility is important. You might be tempted to believe that your worry is the only thing staving off complete disaster, but no one is that powerful.

Life is short. I bet there are very few chronic worriers whose last words were, "Gee, I'm glad I worried so much instead of enjoying life more."

Hi Scott,
Your reply hit the nail right on the head. Your tire example is one of the many useless worries I struggle with. Sometimes I check the on board computer several times during the trip. I am not sure why, and I am not really sure what the tire pressor should be anyway. Seeing that we have a longer trip coming up with our pup in a few months again, I will work on it to eliminate this worry and make it a reasonable concern by only checking it once before the trip.
Thank you again. your reply was very helpful to me.
Adelheid 😊