@t101, Welcome to Mayo Connect. I can understand how disappointed you must be feeling right now. I mean a successful organ transplant surgery and recovery is supposed to make everything A-okay again isn't it? I received a liver and kidney transplant in 2009.
At only 3 weeks post transplant surgery, your husband's body is still in recovery mode. He is healing and on a regimen of strong medications that are needed to prevent infections and organ rejection. It is quite normal for a patient to be physically weak, confused about everything that has occurred, and even disappointed that he is not immediately well again. Sometimes the medications are the cause for his moodiness, and that is something that you will want to discuss with his transplant team.

@t101, One thing that I experienced was the need to be left alone for a while with no questions, no conversations, while I processed in my mind everything that I had gone thru. I needed time to cry, to pray, to ponder, - and to enjoy some freedom from hospital environment. I slept often, and each day from noon - 3 PM was "my" quiet time. Hubby took all phone calls so that I was not disturbed. This was something that a dear friend suggested to us. Is it possible that your husband needs some time for himself? I used to get angry at my husband for hovering over me. I still do!
I want to congratulate you and your husband for his kidney transplant. I trust that he will become his normal loving self.

@t101, Have you spoken to the transplant team about what you are experiencing? They need to know this.