Hi Colleen
I have finally found the way to respond. I am new to using my computer for much more than searching and emailing our family. I am learning more each day about Parkinsons combined with diabetes, and a stubborn husband who doesn't even try the suggestions his doctors offer. I realize that I cannot change his mind set, so I am learning ways to work around it. I have always been a person with routines and it's hard to adjust my routine and schedules to fit all of his needs. He does not drive, so when he wishes to go into town, I must fit it into my day. I am trying to learn not to feel resentful at being on call 24/7. We have been married for 41 years, have 9 adult children, scattered from Virginia to Hawaii and numerous states between, with none close enough to see often. They are supportive but we don't see them very often.
I have medical problems of my own, am undergoing numerous neurological tests and am waiting for results. I am able to be active again, following an aortic valve replacement seven years ago. I do relaxation exercises, and try to maintain a positive feeling, but some days are just too overwhelming. Our medical community is great, they keep in close touch, but like most doctors and hospitals, they are understaffed and sometimes the wait to see them seems so long. We live close to the hospital which is equipped to deal with everything but organ transplants, and the medical clinic has a walk in and emergency area, open 4 hours a day too.
I've had a good life, but oh how I miss seeing my husband's smile, hearing his laugh, enjoy his sarcasm, being able to "read" his moods and being able to discuss our feeliings about what's to come. Sometimes I just want to hear happy, friendly voices. I don't mind solitude, I have many hobbies and other interests, so I don't sit idle. I am glad to finally understand how to reply to this group. Please let me know if I am too wordy, writing is one of those hobbies. Thank you for being there for me.