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Meet fellow Caregivers - Introduce yourself
Caregivers | Last Active: Nov 12, 2023 | Replies (707)Comment receiving replies
I am the caregiver for my spouse who is suffering from 24/7 severe chronic pain due to arachnoiditis and other pain issues. She has it in her lumbar nerves but has also convinced herself that it has spread all the way up her spine to her head thus causing migraine headaches. There is no MRI evidence of this. She refuses any treatment as she is fearful of additional pain from the treatment. Every day around 6pm she experiences such pain that she will pass out. She won't take her pain meds until the pain gets to this point. I feel badly for her but also get angry because I feel she isn't acting in her own best interests and is seeking my attention and empathy. On top of that I am recovering from my 4th concussion. Any suggestions as to how to be more compassionate and responsive would be greatly appreciated.
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SO hard when you feel like you’re taking their condition more seriously than they are. I empathize. Almost like a power struggle with the pain meds —- her power struggle with them. I’m so sorry you carry this burden. This stuff isn’t easy. I sometimes get the feeling that the outside world thinks the caregiver is supposed to perform like a perfect character in a version of “Father Knows Best”. There are still occasional arguments or disagreements. Still stress and tension from the caregiving role. And even though I empathize I don’t have any wisdom or advice or answers. I”m going through struggles with watching my husband NOT do the PT exercises and get weaker every month. Watching him NOT watch his sugar intake and my seeing his blood sugar ratings spike to alarming highs. I guess I would say that we as caregivers give “compassion in action” —- we may not have sweet words and tenderness on occasion, but we’re there every day offering the help and care continually. Sorry that I don’t know answers, but you sound like you’ve got a tremendous load with her care needs and your own.