@gpigford Lots of responses that show the breath and depth of experiences and emotion. When one loses a friend or relative to the same cancer that they now have, there can be a feeling of despair and sense that the doctors didn’t get it right the first time. But know that so much has happened in the advancement of breast cancer treatment. I am hoping the picture of the book that my husband still glances at 3+ years later will help. (The Breast Cancer Support Partner Handbook by Judy C Kneece). There is also a companion book. We thought I had lobular cancer in only 1 breast. My double mastectomy revealed lobular and ductal cancer in the other. My dermatologist was treating me for Lyme disease concurrently and a skin biopsy came back positive for breast cancer that had spread. No scans or test could have picked that up. The both of you are on a team now and for the time being she is the captain. Continue to be on her team - the books will help - and you never know the when, where and how that you will be needed. And know that you are both on a much larger team that you both never wanted to be on - but we all got your backs!! Good luck to you both!

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