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Penile melanoma --Melanoma is NOT just skin cancer!
April, 2020 my “Significant Other” (Jerry-- Age 82) discovered a small black spot on his penis. It was biopsied and confirmed to be melanoma. He had a partial penectomy. March, 2021 he had another partial penectomy with lymph nodes biopsied. Melanoma was in one node which was removed and he was classed at stage 4.
Each PET scan showed numerous small nodules in his lungs that were too small to identify, but with each PET scan, they were a little larger. In April, 2021, he was considered NED (No evidence of disease). We were seeing a well known melanoma specialist in Dallas. The side effects of immunotherapy were discussed, and Jerry decided to decline treatment. The doctor agreed with his decision, based on his age and the side effects of treatment. . He asked about the recurrence and was told---it WILL come back, it is just a matter of when and where.
He was very sick and I took him to the ER on July 12, 2021, and had to cancel the routine PET and brain MRI scheduled for July 14. During the ER and hospital admission, a lung CT was done. The doc told me at that time that his lungs were full of cancer—he considered him terminal and said I would be looking at hospice very soon. Jerry hated the trips to Dallas, so I finally gave in and agreed to request an appointment with the local oncology group.
The doctor was pleasant and friendly, but I am not sure how much he knows about melanoma! He admitted that he had not read all the reports and that this was a difficult and unusual case. PET and brain MRI were scheduled. Results showed widespread mets—Lungs, thorax, mammary glands, possible colon, and started to spread to the bones. The nodules in his lungs had grown from 1.7 cm to 8 & 10 cm in 4 weeks time! The doc recommended Keytruda. He made immunotherapy seem like a walk in the park. Jerry had the port placed yesterday and will have his first treatment on Tuesday Aug. 31. He will have treatments every 3 weeks times 6—then go for another PET.
Strangely enough, Jerry still feels good. He does get tired easily and takes naps---not unusual at age 82. His appetite comes and goes, but he is maintaining his weight.
I think that if he experiences much in the way of side effects, that he will stop—he says he will not give up, but on the other hand, he will prefer quality of life over quantity.
My question is----what are the odds that this treatment will stop the spread???
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@texastribble And just what you needed to her right then, right? Shame on those other three people!
And, to ask the same thing he did, are you eating, sleeping, do you have family around?
Ginger
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1 ReactionHi Texas. Was wondering about you and how you’re getting along with this? If I don’t hear from you before Christmas know I’m thinking about you and prayers mercy and comfy for you.
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1 ReactionJust checking back in. It has been a difficult 2 weeks! We did not have any kind of service---I thought about it, but I am just too exhausted. His family is all too far away to be here---if they wanted to come they should have come before his passing. We have a few close friends in the area, but they all understand. I am hanging in there most days. Yesterday I started taking pictures off his phone before I had it disconnected. That left me crying most of the day. Today not much better. I thought after losing both my kids that there were no more tears---but God just keeps making more. Hopefully after the holidays are over I can figure out what my new "normal" will be and I can put the pieces together.
For now, I have the closets and drawers emptied. Between Christmas and the first of the year, weather permitting, most of it will go to the Salvation Army. There are lots and lots of warm clothing that is badly needed there.
Christmas Eve, I will go to a girl friend's house where we will eat and drink wine and enjoy each other--she is blessed to still have her daughter and they are very close. It will be a fun evening. Then, my grands and great grands will be over for Christmas. I have a prime rib roast ($$$ they had better appreciate it!) My grand daughter-in-love has been on a keto diet for a long time and lost a close to 100# so I am making a keto cheese cake so she can enjoy the dessert. Several gifts for the littles--age 6 and 3---
I am trying to put the pieces together---but when I am alone, all I want to do is cry.
There are lots of activities in our little community but I just have not felt like participating. I cannot handle a crowd yet.
Jan. 1 will be the start of the new year---and my new life. I have some things planned that I want to do, and will put my big girl panties on and move forward.
Hugs to all---I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and prosperous and healthy 2022~~~
Jurhee Ivy aka TexasTribble (that was one of my pups that has gone to the Rainbow Bridge)
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2 Reactions@texastribble Jurhee, so glad you checked in, as I have been thinking of you! You certainly have been busy and productive. Knowing warm clothes from Jerry's closets will be gratefully accepted eases the burden a little, as you think back and recall when Jerry wore them. You are proving to us all that we each have our own timeline for grieving and how we do that. Please don't forget to take care of yourself. Perhaps sit with a hot cup of tea, or a glass of milk, and some cookies, and relax for a bit?
If you are so inclined, there is a Loss and Grief discussion group here on Mayo Clinic Connect https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/loss-grief/ with several threads already started.
Your family will wrap you in their hearts, as you have done for them. I also wish you a wonderful holiday, raising a cup of coffee [for this time of day!] and saluting your strength!
Ginger
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1 ReactionI just got notice that his ashes will be delivered today. li
He actually passed on Dec. 5. That was the anniversary of my son's passing. He was a bit restless about 11 PM, so I gave him a little med to settle him down--and I think it was no long after that. There had been no breath sounds for a few hours and I could not feel a pulse---just a tiny bit of chest movement. I did not see the need to get the sweet Hospice ladies out in the middle of the night---and I wanted my last bit of time with him---so I waited until 6 am to call. So "officially" he was pronounced on the 6th.
I know there will be times -times that sneak up out of the blue----and I will have to deal with it as I have dealt with it when losing my kids. I still have those moments. My son died Dec. 5, 2015, and my daughter Sept. 12, 2017. So, I have many days --many sad anniversaries--each year. I will be 80 in March, so this has all taken a toll on me, physically and mentally. But, like I said earlier, I will just have to put the big girl panties on and keep on keepin' one. One thing I have wanted to do for a long time but haven't---but will now---is to start mailing cards and notes to people. I have a big box of cards just sitting needing to be used. There are so many people that need just a little note of encouragement---so that is one thing that I am going be working on. Today, I am going to start organizing my "office" to make that easier to do. I will also make it my quiet place for prayer and devotional readings. Because of several situations, I have not been actively attending church services in quite a while. I went week before last and it was a great little congregation---small, no big mega church with all the drums and guitars!!!! Not my style!!! Anyway, I will get my life back together as it should be.
Enough rambling on and on!!! Thanks for listening!
Hugs to all----I am in the Dallas/Fort Worth area if any of you are around here!
Jurhee
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1 ReactionSending you gentle hugs, Jurhee.
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