Incredibly lonely, shutting down: Suffering with Anhedonia

@januaryjane

I hope you're doing ok tonight. Was there something that helped you get through the day? I work hard in the yard and gardens during the day, and that gives me something to focus on instead of the burning pain in my feet, and the mental pain. It was kinda hot today, so I had to take a lot of shade breaks to cool down. If you're up to it, let me know how your feelings of loneliness and fear are today.

Be safe, and be kind and gentle with yourself.

Jim

Hello @januaryjane,

It has been a while since you last posted on Connect. How are you doing? Have you spoken with your doctor or a counselor regarding your feelings of loneliness?

@januaryjane I have tried EMDR but brought up trauma difficult to deal with and had to stop that type of therapy. Now I feel PTSD has emerged and trying to find a therapist that can help me focus on getting past the trauma and back into life. Hoping...

Hello @januaryjane,

It has been several months since you last posted. I was thinking about you. How you are doing? Any progress in dealing with your feelings of fear?
Will you post again with an update?

I know how you feel! I’m going through the same thing! But, we must keep putting one foot in front the other!🙏

I get lonely too. One way I fight loneliness is to play euchre, there are euchre tournaments in my area. Another way to fight loneliness is to get involved with a congregation of a large church. There are many activities, I have made new friends attending a weekly bible study.

Hello... I found this community site this evening. Just wanted to say that I feel for those going through mental health issues such as depression and I must admit I had to look up the word Anhedonia. Also would like to say how nice that so many people responded to the original question with advice. At 77 and having multiple life-changing illnesses and a lot of medication misfortunes, I won't take up half a page relating them, but those along with leaving UK at 18 to live in Canada and abusive first marriage, etc., Anxiety and Depression, I have too long a list ! But I do find reading about how people are getting through the really tough times, which meds have been tried, and to read I am not alone with issues does help. What I wish is that early treatment (not long waiting list) would be available... it is for emergency treatment, but waiting ten months to see a psychiatrist is too long if it is to be covered financially by our government plan - which is appreciated $$$, but sometimes if help can be given sooner rather than later, it can make a big difference. Private visits for which I paid for myself had far shorter wait times, but if the Therapist isn't licenced then cannot claim any amount on private insurance. I must say that over the years a lot more help is available and mental health issues discussed more openly than they were when I was a young adult... and no computers in those days to share information. I am in a bad place right now and where I live 400 of us have no family doctor... mine left town... but thankfully now can do phone appointments or over Internet...it's not the same as person to person but am thankful there is a way to talk to someone. Sorry, just wanted to comment on this friendly site, and to wish everyone suffering a positive outcome, and also thank those who respond with suggestions/personal stories. J.S.

@lacy2 Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I am glad to see you here, and you have raised points that are so valid in these times. It seems that even with the advances in medicine it can still be difficult to get the assistance we need. That is where this patient forum is valuable. Knowing others are "in the same boat" and can share makes our dark days a bit brighter, doesn't it?

What kind of treatment have you experienced at this point?
Ginger

Thank you Ginger. I was glad to find this site but to be honest, and at my age of 77, I have a "laundry list" of physical and mental issues intertwined with working, raising two children, etc. and seeking help and offering to share things that have worked or not worked for me... but so many I don't know where to begin. Right now I am at the end of my rope... told my daughter yesterday its been and is like walking on a tightrope over a ravine and every time the wind blows, almost fall off, but steady myself with or without help and then it rains, or attacked by birds, then back standing on the rope and inch forward and there comes a time one wonders should I just jump off
Mental health treatment? which started when given wrong medication when in hospital many years ago... and first visit to psychiatrist and he said ptsd depression at that time - 1985 - over the wrongs meds and cancer treatment; only on meds 6 weeks in those days and back to work; but then saw him again 5 years later and its been on again off again since then. Would have 5 or more years in between but sadly last few years its been hard to shake.
I was on Zoloft and Rivotril, I think in USA called Klonapin.. and family doctors continued to give it to me without question for almost 20 years...and I did see "social workers" during that time. Two years ago diagnosed with Glaucoma so took MYSELF off zoloft and stayed on Rivotril ....for six months. But then Had to go to emerge as so "down" and young psychiatrist took me OFF RIVOTRIL after last 5 piills (after almost 20 yrs) and put me back on Zoloft even though I had been told by Eye Specialist not to take it as raises eye pressure)narrow angle glaucoma.
Long story short (sorry its long) I went into withdrawal from Rivotril which I had been given as a sleeping pill and thought it was; yet after taking Zoloft many years, after being off it six months, when went back on had heart racing through the night and even went to emerge in ambulance! This Zoloft reaction (weird) was daily and I took MYSELF off again and honestly within 3 days the heart pounding stopped as did the daily shakes. I remained and remain on the Rivotril but have to beg for it. Imagine being called a drug seeker at 77 and doctor discharged me from his practice and I dont even drink or smoke etc. etc. Now I have more physcal problems and spouse just had open heart surgery... it is what it is and every one of us has this "beast" to deal with.
So you see, this is why I am hesitant to join the site and comment becauce I coulld write pages......and thats not really fair. Maybe there is a section here for older people who talk too much, like me ..... sorry

@lacy2 Many of us can nod our collective heads and relate to your experiences. The dates or medication or length of time might be different, but there are a lot of similarities! I know for me, having a place to share, to "get it off my chest or out of my mind" helps. Remember we are all in this life experience together, even if separated by miles. It truly does help to know others can relate!

If you would like to use journaling or writing as a tool, try this discussion thread: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/journaling-the-write-stuff-for-you/. Also, we have the Aging Well group where you will find many different topics being discussed:https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/aging-well/ Come back and tell me what you think of these, please?

I hope you are able to turn to your daughter and express your thoughts. I liked your analogy of the tightrope and the challenges, it sure gave me a visual that I agreed with! Things that works for me are: writing and journaling, finding small things to be grateful for [and writing them down!], noticing the natural world around me, walking outside to refresh my body and mind. Being your own advocate for body and mind health is empowering.
Ginger