Dear @hotfooted, your story reminded me of my moms long battle with kidney disease and stroke. She died in 2018 when her lone kidney completely failed. She had dialysis several times at the end of her life and had also been blind for nearly a decade from one of several strokes. Your family is so fortunate to have someone like you caring for them. You have been gifted with the unique ability to shoulder their burdens as your own. Not everyone can do what you are doing which is so commendable! I too was in a similar situation with my mom as you are currently with your son. During her decline despite that fact that I have other siblings who could have helped take charge of her end of life issues I was the one who was with her when she passed along with my dad.
I often wonder why I was the only one there at the end for her. I now believe it was because I was the only one who COULD be there for her physically and spiritually.
Sincere thoughts to you and your family as you make important decisions on their behalf. They undoubtedly have a dedicated caring advocate they can trust in to do the right thing for them.
Bless you.