1. < Just Want to Talk

Recognizing my own bias or prejudice .....

Posted by ellerbracke @ellerbracke, Aug 31, 2019

I know I am very guilty of classifying people in general, and regarding weight in particular. Living in the bible/heart attack/ diabetes belt, it simply blows my mind how many obese people I see every single day when out and about. Granted, fewer of those at Dillard’s than Walmart. Still, in addition to being concerned, I am also judging those people. I know I should not, but how in the world can someone get that fat? It would take years of dedicated overeating to reach that. No, I really don’t think that all of them have a medical issue, seeing what’s in their grocery carts. Someone help me get a less judgmental attitude when I’ve been semi-denying myself all those chips and cookies and fries for decades?? I live and eat well, but treats should be treats, not daily food.

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lioness | @lioness | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @imallears "@ayeshasharma Hi, The best alternative for me for daily starches is to just avoid them period..." + (show)
@imallears

@ayeshasharma
Hi,

The best alternative for me for daily starches is to just avoid them period or limit to one a day. There are carbs in almost all foods but the unhealthy white refined starch is the worse. So I consciously limit my daily intake of potatoes or bread. I use lettuce wraps and mainly have protein and a veggie for main meals. I don’t miss it. I’ll order a burger outside, discard the top bun and knife and fork it or just ask for it bunless. It’s a conscious effort and the best defense is not to have it in the house. I avoid wheat as much as possible. This morning my gluten free chia waffle with blueberries is my conscious carb for the day. I’m not buying as much gluten free bread as I use to because a lot contain sugar. I am no longer a sandwich eater.
Some carbs are essential for a healthy lifestyle. Be mindful of what you eat and learn about your body and the fuel it needs and it becomes second nature. But don’t deprive yourself...that’s no way to live....I’ll never pass up a pizza lol.

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@imallears Yes you are right I don't deprive myself of anything but eat in portions some only once in awhile like sweets ,bread once a day no sugar Ive done without for years except whats already in food and that's enough . I do eat protein my condition requires it so little chicken ,fish and once a week maybe red meat . Try to stay away from chocolate but dark chocolate is good for you in getting your antioxidents that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. No processed food at all ever since we found out our son was allergic to dyes and artificial flavorings so that isn't a big deal. GO ORGANIC

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lioness | @lioness | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @contentandwell "@lioness. You didn’t have to say it was Italian with a name like that! 😁. I..." + (show)
@contentandwell

@lioness. You didn’t have to say it was Italian with a name like that!
😁.
I love eggplant parm, but with all that cheese it does have a lot of sodium. That’s enough for me too. I also make a delicious 😋 dinner, lasagna roll ups stuffed with ricotta, spinach, and chopped mushrooms. I usually put a meat sauce on it but it’s easy to customize it by using marinara when I will be serving my son-in-law. Although he does now eat chicken, he won’t eat red meat at all. He was born in this country but I think the Indian culture is a strong one.

@ayeshasharma I think it’s a vicious circle - depression leads to eating, gaining weight causes more depression. This is an area where I am experienced having been about 90 pounds heavier at one time. Frankly, as much as I absolutely love my son and daughter, I never should have given up work entirely. It was much more difficult in those days to work in a professional field part-time, and virtually impossible to work off-site.
JK

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@contentandwell This was my special occasion I don't eat eggplant most of the time. I was surprised ther wasn't much cheese on it They where rounds of eggplant toped with the sauce and a blotch of cheese on top I drank 2 glasses of Ice Tea . to dilute the salt

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Mentor
Ginger, Volunteer Mentor | @gingerw | Oct 11, 2019

I find this discussion to be fascinating, as you follow the twists and turns from the original comments. I have at least two siblings who are vegetarians or vegans, yet have moderately controlled sweet-tooths. Myself, due to kidney issues, eat a low potassium/low phosphorus/low sodium diet, with almost no dairy. Plus low purine due to gout [no shellfish, mushrooms, pork]. Very little red meat, lots of chicken and fish; some day I will wake up clucking! Yes, as @ayeshasharma said, poor eating and depression are linked, ask me how I know!
Ginger

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1 reply
JK | @contentandwell | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @ayeshasharma "@imallears seems like you've got a system worked out for yourself. It's really smart to keep..." + (show)
@ayeshasharma

@imallears seems like you've got a system worked out for yourself. It's really smart to keep temptations out of the house if you're looking to decrease your intake of something. For me, there are MANY temptations, but the main ones I've intentionally stopped buying are chips.

Something I heard the other day, which I agreed with, is that many trendy diets have been proven to work for weight loss, but the real key to changing your diet (in whatever way, not necessarily just for weight loss) is creating a diet that you know you'll stick to. For me, that means making sure everything I cook is flavorful.

@jakedduck1 lol I think you're referring to a chia pet!

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@ayeshasharma This is what I have tried to do. A real bagel is a distant memory! I do buy whole wheat mini bagels, they’re not bad and don’t have excessive calories or carbs. When we have meatballs and sauce I don’t have pasta, I serve mine on top of squash.
Even for people not looking to lose weight MyFitnessPal can be a huge help because it tracks nutrients. You can tell it which nutrients you want tracked too.
My almost daily salad is a salad with greens, chicken, strawberries and goat cheese crumbles. I was lactose intolerant for a while but that seems to have gone away so I can once again have goat cheese. Not only do I love goat cheese, but it has about half the sodium of other cheeses like blue cheese.
Living with my husband is tough, he eats anything and everything, yet does not gain weight! Not fair! If we go out for lunch he often gets a Reuben. One of these days I plan to give in to that and have one too. The other day I had a “knife and fork” burger. It was pretty good, it had some avocado with it.
I know a lot of people do like cauliflower rice but it was unacceptable to my husband so it’s easier for me to just skip it than to make two different things.
My son-in-law went to a nutritionist at one point a few years ago and was also advised to not limit his diet so much. I have no idea if his current diet has improved that.
JK
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JK | @contentandwell | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @ayeshasharma "@contentandwell your son-in-law must have been raised Hindu, as was I. Our families don't usually eat..." + (show)
@ayeshasharma

@contentandwell your son-in-law must have been raised Hindu, as was I. Our families don't usually eat beef, as respect for the cow is a part of Hindu belief.
Muslims generally eat beef, as long as it's halal, but adhering Muslims don't eat pork.

When my parents were raising my brother and I, they weren't too strict on not eating beef themselves, so we ate it every once in a while. I've grown to have a complicated relationship with beef, mainly because of the US meat and dairy industry.

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@ayeshasharma
He was raised Hindu, more culturally than religiously. His parents and sister eat no meat or fish though.

@lioness I have the same excuse when it comes to dark chocolate. I buy high quality bars and break them into sections and store them in a little covered dish. I just finished one that was in the 90s, that was a little too much. I like 85%.
JK

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lioness | @lioness | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @ayeshasharma "@contentandwell your son-in-law must have been raised Hindu, as was I. Our families don't usually eat..." + (show)
@ayeshasharma

@contentandwell your son-in-law must have been raised Hindu, as was I. Our families don't usually eat beef, as respect for the cow is a part of Hindu belief.
Muslims generally eat beef, as long as it's halal, but adhering Muslims don't eat pork.

When my parents were raising my brother and I, they weren't too strict on not eating beef themselves, so we ate it every once in a while. I've grown to have a complicated relationship with beef, mainly because of the US meat and dairy industry.

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@ayeshasharma My D.I.L. parents are from India and they are Muslim but she was born in Long Beach but as a vegan she doesn't eat meat of anykind. Not even the gel that's in the candies either .

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ellerbracke | @ellerbracke | Oct 11, 2019

Pretty much to all: I started the subject with emphasis on prejudice, and ended up with helpful discussions about several different subjects like depression, suicide, ethnical, health, or other food limitations. I learned a lot, and I think this is what makes this forum so helpful. Now I will ruin this post by saying that all in all, I eat what I want (mostly good stuff), as much as I want (not ever even close), as often as I want. NO! I generally eat until I feel about 2/3s full, eating slowly. Makes it a lot easier not to overeat, Plus, I love all vegetables, and could live without bread - husband opposite. he’ll have a dinner roll to go with a cheese toast. ☹️
For JK: BMI is 21.4

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1 reply
JK | @contentandwell | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @ellerbracke "Pretty much to all: I started the subject with emphasis on prejudice, and ended up with..." + (show)
@ellerbracke

Pretty much to all: I started the subject with emphasis on prejudice, and ended up with helpful discussions about several different subjects like depression, suicide, ethnical, health, or other food limitations. I learned a lot, and I think this is what makes this forum so helpful. Now I will ruin this post by saying that all in all, I eat what I want (mostly good stuff), as much as I want (not ever even close), as often as I want. NO! I generally eat until I feel about 2/3s full, eating slowly. Makes it a lot easier not to overeat, Plus, I love all vegetables, and could live without bread - husband opposite. he’ll have a dinner roll to go with a cheese toast. ☹️
For JK: BMI is 21.4

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@ellerbracke my BMI is about 26 I think and my PCP does not want me to lose more. They actually say that as you age it’s good to have a little extra weight, I guess because if you get sick you have more to draw from. I don’t know if that’s why he doesn’t think I should lose more or what it is. Most people do not feel that I should lose more though.

When I was young I did get my weight down a lot and people were asking others if I had been sick! I hadn’t been of course but the weight I was at was not sustainable for me. I did not get that low in a healthy way. I was not underweight according to charts.
JK

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1 reply
Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Oct 11, 2019
In reply to @gingerw "I find this discussion to be fascinating, as you follow the twists and turns from the..." + (show)
@gingerw

I find this discussion to be fascinating, as you follow the twists and turns from the original comments. I have at least two siblings who are vegetarians or vegans, yet have moderately controlled sweet-tooths. Myself, due to kidney issues, eat a low potassium/low phosphorus/low sodium diet, with almost no dairy. Plus low purine due to gout [no shellfish, mushrooms, pork]. Very little red meat, lots of chicken and fish; some day I will wake up clucking! Yes, as @ayeshasharma said, poor eating and depression are linked, ask me how I know!
Ginger

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@gingerw
”some day I will wake up clucking!”
lol lol lol hahaha hahaha
Jake

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ellerbracke | @ellerbracke | Oct 13, 2019

General comment: I’m on the waiting list for the latest book by Malcolm Gladwell titled “talking to strangers”. This author has always been a fascinating source of well researched information, and I expect this latest book to perhaps shed some light on pre-conceptions and erroneous assumptions of people and their motives. Just in case there are any interested readers out there.

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