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Colleen Young, Connect Director (@colleenyoung)

What ways you can help when you can’t be a living donor?

Transplants | Last Active: Oct 17, 2019 | Replies (11)

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@deanaliddy

Although my husband and I were blood matches, a good start for living donor kidney transplant, we were both turned down when we tried to donate to our friend who was going on the list. I previously had breast cancer and was turned down for that reason. My husband is 79 and has early Alzheimer's although he can tell you why he wants to donate and understands the process. He was turned down because of age and the impact of major surgery on dementia.
What we have done is to stay in contact with our friend, to share the process and outcome with him and his wife so that they know what donors need to be doing, and we also gave them a bear totem, a Native American symbol of strength and healing which he finds comforting.

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Replies to "Although my husband and I were blood matches, a good start for living donor kidney transplant,..."

@deanaliddy Being supportive like you describe is so very important to a patient! How is your friend and his wife doing in their search for a donor? Bears are one of my totems, too, which I always remember as there is one who comes by to rustle my berry bushes every so often!
Ginger

@deanaliddy, I want to say Welcome to Connect. Your desire to help your friend is a kindness beyond words. I am a transplant recipient, and although my donor was a deceased donor, I want to say thank you for what you have already done and for what you are doing now for your friend. Your friend is fortunate to have you at his side.

Here are two links related to living kidney donation that you can share with your friend, and with others who are possible donors.
-This is a Transplant Discussion where living kidney donors are telling about and answering questions about their own experience of kidney donation. It is called- The Journey from the Donor's Side.
https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/kidney-transplant-from-the-donor-side/
-This is the Living Kidney Donor Toolkit that is part of Connect Transplant Pages.
What to Know about being a Living Kidney Donor https://connect.mayoclinic.org/page/transplant/tab/resource-36/