Appointment yesterday resulted in another referral to another specialist. The tumor is an aggressive type of cancer. Now waiting on another specialist and appointment. @hopeful33250 Yes, this does cause flashbacks. Also unusual for a woman to have bladder cancer. Feeling like I am being offered to the slashers with no encouragement. They have left me feeling as good as dead and nothing more than a filthy woman. They would not be this cold with another man. I have always been treated lesser than. In a hard place and would rather just let the cancer do its thing rather than being treated like it seems I am being treated. Currently despondent. So much for being a supportive member. Hopefully there is something to be learned by someone.
@parus I am sorry that you feel that your doctors have been less than caring. I agree with @becsbuddy, try to find a female urologist. A female would probably be much more caring and certainly not treat you in a lesser way. My husband had to recently get a new PCP and he chose a woman because he feels they are more caring and more thorough.
Please do not be despondent, and do not think about letting "the cancer do its thing". If there is a treatment you need to have faith that you will succeed in getting better.
Please let us know how things turn, and again, please look for another doctor, preferably a woman.
JK
Appointment yesterday resulted in another referral to another specialist. The tumor is an aggressive type of cancer. Now waiting on another specialist and appointment. @hopeful33250 Yes, this does cause flashbacks. Also unusual for a woman to have bladder cancer. Feeling like I am being offered to the slashers with no encouragement. They have left me feeling as good as dead and nothing more than a filthy woman. They would not be this cold with another man. I have always been treated lesser than. In a hard place and would rather just let the cancer do its thing rather than being treated like it seems I am being treated. Currently despondent. So much for being a supportive member. Hopefully there is something to be learned by someone.
Oh, @parus. I'm so sorry to hear that your appointment was so difficult! It sounds like it was difficult in more ways than one. Asking for a female doctor (be it an oncologist or urologist) is going to be important for you in order to weather this storm. I know that it is difficult to advocate for yourself but we are behind you and will cheer you on! We care for you a lot @parus!
Appointment yesterday resulted in another referral to another specialist. The tumor is an aggressive type of cancer. Now waiting on another specialist and appointment. @hopeful33250 Yes, this does cause flashbacks. Also unusual for a woman to have bladder cancer. Feeling like I am being offered to the slashers with no encouragement. They have left me feeling as good as dead and nothing more than a filthy woman. They would not be this cold with another man. I have always been treated lesser than. In a hard place and would rather just let the cancer do its thing rather than being treated like it seems I am being treated. Currently despondent. So much for being a supportive member. Hopefully there is something to be learned by someone.
Understanding how vulnerable and despondent you are right now. Please do not give up. It is so important you have doctor you trust and can relate to! When my husband had cancer we switched onocologists three times before we found doctor that not only searched for and treated his cancer in an aggressive and positive way, but also treated my husband and I with kindness and dignity. You deserve good care and kindness, and I pray you will get that!
@hopeful33250 Back to the Urologist this afternoon for results of biopsy. See what then. Dealing with several things at one time has me worn out and highly agitated and quite grumpy. I just want to stay home where I feel safe. Being poked and prodded by men is causing relapses. Can't be helped. All I ever see is the PA. I would not even know the doctor as I have never met him. Pretty fed up but still making appointments for now.
Understanding how vulnerable and despondent you are right now. Please do not give up. It is so important you have doctor you trust and can relate to! When my husband had cancer we switched onocologists three times before we found doctor that not only searched for and treated his cancer in an aggressive and positive way, but also treated my husband and I with kindness and dignity. You deserve good care and kindness, and I pray you will get that!
Hi, @parus - If you would like to read some of what others on Connect have said about bladder cancer and perhaps connect with some of them when it's a good time for you, here are a couple of threads you might want to look at:
Hi, @parus - If you would like to read some of what others on Connect have said about bladder cancer and perhaps connect with some of them when it's a good time for you, here are a couple of threads you might want to look at:
Appointment yesterday resulted in another referral to another specialist. The tumor is an aggressive type of cancer. Now waiting on another specialist and appointment. @hopeful33250 Yes, this does cause flashbacks. Also unusual for a woman to have bladder cancer. Feeling like I am being offered to the slashers with no encouragement. They have left me feeling as good as dead and nothing more than a filthy woman. They would not be this cold with another man. I have always been treated lesser than. In a hard place and would rather just let the cancer do its thing rather than being treated like it seems I am being treated. Currently despondent. So much for being a supportive member. Hopefully there is something to be learned by someone.
Connect
Connect
Like
Helpful
Hug
@parus I am sorry that you feel that your doctors have been less than caring. I agree with @becsbuddy, try to find a female urologist. A female would probably be much more caring and certainly not treat you in a lesser way. My husband had to recently get a new PCP and he chose a woman because he feels they are more caring and more thorough.
Please do not be despondent, and do not think about letting "the cancer do its thing". If there is a treatment you need to have faith that you will succeed in getting better.
Please let us know how things turn, and again, please look for another doctor, preferably a woman.
JK
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsOh, @parus. I'm so sorry to hear that your appointment was so difficult! It sounds like it was difficult in more ways than one. Asking for a female doctor (be it an oncologist or urologist) is going to be important for you in order to weather this storm. I know that it is difficult to advocate for yourself but we are behind you and will cheer you on! We care for you a lot @parus!
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
5 ReactionsUnderstanding how vulnerable and despondent you are right now. Please do not give up. It is so important you have doctor you trust and can relate to! When my husband had cancer we switched onocologists three times before we found doctor that not only searched for and treated his cancer in an aggressive and positive way, but also treated my husband and I with kindness and dignity. You deserve good care and kindness, and I pray you will get that!
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
6 ReactionsHi Parus, if you can get in touch with Dr. Bernard Bochner in Memorial Sloan NY. I really think he can help you.
I wish you all the best!
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
4 Reactions@veronicat Appreciate the suggestion. I live in Indiana.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 Reaction@cherriann Thank you. Options are limited in my area. Transportation/finances present obstacles. Only so much I can do with finding doctors.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 ReactionHi, @parus - If you would like to read some of what others on Connect have said about bladder cancer and perhaps connect with some of them when it's a good time for you, here are a couple of threads you might want to look at:
Bladder Cancer https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/bladder-cancer-7
Bladder Cancer/Small cell bladder cancer https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/small-cell-bladder-cancer
You might also check into the National Cancer Institute Designated Cancer Centers in Indiana on this locator https://www.cancer.gov/research/nci-role/cancer-centers/find. I see there are two in your state.
How are you feeling today?
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsDear Lisa, do you have a link for bladder prolapse surgery and doctors? Regards
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 ReactionYes, absolutely, @veronicat. Here's a large Connect discussion on prolapse that's been ongoing for several years https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/i-am-looking-to-discuss-prolapse-bladder-or-any-kind-of-prolapse
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsHi, @parus - wondering how things are going with your health? your spirits?
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 Reactions