Importance of focusing on Positive with Depression & Anxiety.

Posted by BoneHead @stsopoci, May 27, 2019

In my journey with the millions of humans who are brave enough to go down the path of recovery without alcohol, bad drug and more drugs, I have gradually more and more discovered how important it is to crawl out of my deep hole, bad attitude, self-importance, feeling sorry for myself, angry, sad, etc, etc, condition and more toward the LIGHT!!! That means changing and moving for me away from some friends that are very negative about everything. That means walking around the block when I get upset so I can calm down and see the light. That means taking care of myself, exercising, eating right and meeting new friends and keeping old friends that are well-balanced. Positivity in life is available to everyone and it's FREE. I have gone on a path throughout my early days of self-medicating with lots of alcohol, drug, etc. I cleaned myself up in 1996, OCT 13th but I still did not feel right until I could ask for help from a professional. Found out I was GAD (inherited from my MOM) and a few other close seconds. I went on medication for years on various meds until I found the chemical that keeps me pretty normal. BUT, BUT...something else was missing because I still suffered through the negativity of every situation that I could create in a moments time.

I love these groups because you are honest with yourself which is very important.
Finding good friends that understand you and the importance of staying positive with your journey through life.
Taking good care of yourself.
We all are unique so what works for me does not always work for you. I'm on 20mg of Lexipro.
What do other people do to stay positive?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

@qualityoverload

sounds good i find my solo rides even help a lot dont ride in groups as i loose them on hills

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I am glad to see that biking helps you. Personally my (almost) daily short ride (5 to 10 miles) has been I think literally a life saver. I cycle normaly by myself on a recumbent Terratrike. I greet almost everyone with a smile and a "Good Morning!" as a part of my "therapy" and at least 50% reply equally cheerfully. It is hard to be depressed when you are smiling and exchanging pleasanteries! I also mutter "positive affirmations" to myself several times a trip.....muttering "no pain,great muscles," etc must sound wierd coming from an almost 80 year old man with scoliosis, stenosis and neuropathy BUT it actually helps. It is all to do with neuroplasticity I think. It wasn't easy in the beginning of course but after a few weeks of tears and blues on the trike and studying mindfullness in the evenings my brain "clicked into gear" and the daily chore of cycling gradualy became something I looked forward to. I often take coffee in a flask and a book with me and have a break soaking up the sounds of nature and reading for 10 minutes or so. (This might be more difficult if you live in a busy Urban area but there are often parks, church yards and the like.). All the best for 2020!

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@marazion

I am glad to see that biking helps you. Personally my (almost) daily short ride (5 to 10 miles) has been I think literally a life saver. I cycle normaly by myself on a recumbent Terratrike. I greet almost everyone with a smile and a "Good Morning!" as a part of my "therapy" and at least 50% reply equally cheerfully. It is hard to be depressed when you are smiling and exchanging pleasanteries! I also mutter "positive affirmations" to myself several times a trip.....muttering "no pain,great muscles," etc must sound wierd coming from an almost 80 year old man with scoliosis, stenosis and neuropathy BUT it actually helps. It is all to do with neuroplasticity I think. It wasn't easy in the beginning of course but after a few weeks of tears and blues on the trike and studying mindfullness in the evenings my brain "clicked into gear" and the daily chore of cycling gradualy became something I looked forward to. I often take coffee in a flask and a book with me and have a break soaking up the sounds of nature and reading for 10 minutes or so. (This might be more difficult if you live in a busy Urban area but there are often parks, church yards and the like.). All the best for 2020!

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@marazion You are an inspiration! I will ask my husband to get my bike put together so I can start riding when the weather turns better. We are just starting in to our winter, so will have to rely on walking when possible. Now we are in a rural area, there is some flat places that will be good, just have to watch for the narrower roads.

@qualityoverload Welcome to Mayo Connect! When you lose a group on the hills are you riding ahead of them, or sweeping the back of the pack? Curious minds want to know ;))
Ginger

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@stsopoci

I'm finally figuring out in my life that missing out being a Child when I was a child has finally come back in a vengeance much later in my life. I retired in 2013 but since then I have had periodic very angry outbursts that I was clueless to why they were happening. I finally had suicidal thoughts and depression like I never had before and went into the ER before I either hurt someone or myself. I came out and got into therapy again and with my doctor and my therapist I am moving in the right direction again. I was diagnosed 7 years ago with GAD and have been taking Lexapro. This week I was diagnosed with PTSD from childhood. I have been living through my childhood and didn't know it. I'm finding out more as I talk to my siblings. MY dad was scary and ruled his kingdom inside the house with fear and doom. I was afraid everyday of my childhood. He beat my Mom and when she left the house when it happened he would say that we were next. I was always protecting my Mom from him and had night terrors when I was a child. My childhood was taken from me by him.

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Thankful for your thoughtful replies and I hope you are all seeking help for your mental health issues. It’s been Very revealing to me that it’s taken me decades to find out what has been bothering me subconsciously. I’m in good hands now like I’ve never been before. I’m moving toward the light finally after years of denial.

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I was struggling since 2010. Everything was spiraling out of control. A mishap happened. I had no choice but to make changes. It was probably the best but worst thing that ever happened to me. I was the option to either succeed or fail. No grey areas. Luckily my job never found out bc first and foremost it kept me grounded. An idle mind is a dangerous mind it says something like that in the Bible. Which is very true. What helps me the most is my faith, daughter, and my veteran husband who is in worse shape than me. He needs me. To the point I don't know what would happen to him. So I push on a struggle everyday. But every year I take 10 days and travel to see the world. What God made. It reminds me that there is light and beauty all around us. You haven't seen beauty until you see the Grand canyon. And I have been to islands and 3 different countries. Nothing compares to the canyon. It really reminds myself that we all have time to take a second stand back and let the light in and remember it. That is what I hold onto especially when I have those 4 walls around me again. Thanks for listening...

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@stsopoci

Thankful for your thoughtful replies and I hope you are all seeking help for your mental health issues. It’s been Very revealing to me that it’s taken me decades to find out what has been bothering me subconsciously. I’m in good hands now like I’ve never been before. I’m moving toward the light finally after years of denial.

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To add to something that helps me and my husband get up in the morning and staring at the same four walls everyday most of the time was the decision to get a good dog. I have been seeing a therapist and a psychologist for years because of my husband who has PTSD really bad for the past 14 years. he had to endure many many years of black operations that he can't even speak of. When he doesn't sleep I don't sleep. It's even gotten to the point where I feel like they should diagnose me with a secondary exposure of PTSD but I know there's no such thing. I have read tons of responses from people that can't get out of bed every morning and stare at four Walls everyday. and maybe even sometimes not shower for up to five to seven days. And their family one by one disappears over time and then that person is left alone. Im not a doctor but living with someone and being someone myself with depression and mental instability I can say one thing that is true. A pill does not fix everything. Most of the time talking to a person even when you think you know him does not fix everything because they're not there all the time. But what I do know that I do not hear many people talk about getting pets. Pets always love us, always greet us with a smile never giving us grief or judgment. I do realize that dogs are expensive and a lot of work but as a human being we know it's worth it because it's out of the house it makes us meet new people. It helps put the light back in our lives. But at the same time they make us laugh, they give us a shoulder to cry on, they get us out of the house, and even sometimes they bring us to others. I know it's not always a simple answer...but I think it needs to be mention more on this website. Anywhere from pain, depression, weight gain, pretty much you name it. It's actually be proven pets help us live longer. Everyone today wants a quick fix or pill. But what I have learned from being married to my husband for 14 years and he is in pain 24/7 and barely sleeps or leaves the house. he got off of all the bad pain medicine over a year ago that the VA put him on. And now he's doing more herbal therapies and when we got a dog it changed everything. His pain levels are still very very high but I can see a difference his attitude and overall well-being and spending more and more time with his family. Thank you for listening and hopefully people will read this.

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@veteranspouseinpain

To add to something that helps me and my husband get up in the morning and staring at the same four walls everyday most of the time was the decision to get a good dog. I have been seeing a therapist and a psychologist for years because of my husband who has PTSD really bad for the past 14 years. he had to endure many many years of black operations that he can't even speak of. When he doesn't sleep I don't sleep. It's even gotten to the point where I feel like they should diagnose me with a secondary exposure of PTSD but I know there's no such thing. I have read tons of responses from people that can't get out of bed every morning and stare at four Walls everyday. and maybe even sometimes not shower for up to five to seven days. And their family one by one disappears over time and then that person is left alone. Im not a doctor but living with someone and being someone myself with depression and mental instability I can say one thing that is true. A pill does not fix everything. Most of the time talking to a person even when you think you know him does not fix everything because they're not there all the time. But what I do know that I do not hear many people talk about getting pets. Pets always love us, always greet us with a smile never giving us grief or judgment. I do realize that dogs are expensive and a lot of work but as a human being we know it's worth it because it's out of the house it makes us meet new people. It helps put the light back in our lives. But at the same time they make us laugh, they give us a shoulder to cry on, they get us out of the house, and even sometimes they bring us to others. I know it's not always a simple answer...but I think it needs to be mention more on this website. Anywhere from pain, depression, weight gain, pretty much you name it. It's actually be proven pets help us live longer. Everyone today wants a quick fix or pill. But what I have learned from being married to my husband for 14 years and he is in pain 24/7 and barely sleeps or leaves the house. he got off of all the bad pain medicine over a year ago that the VA put him on. And now he's doing more herbal therapies and when we got a dog it changed everything. His pain levels are still very very high but I can see a difference his attitude and overall well-being and spending more and more time with his family. Thank you for listening and hopefully people will read this.

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Thank you , I've been thinking about getting another dog for a while like you say they just know how to comfort us , a gift for your precious heart 's they stay by you when you are not well and give much more than they get. I watched film were they said dogs are good for nervous system and healing pain by taking your mind of things especially issue's your dealing with each day , so glad I've come across your precious words i can tell their from your heart. Hope people can read your words and able to move forward with your support , your very brave and stronger than you know. Here's hoping you enjoy your precious day ahead knowing that plenty of good comes from sharing your precious encourage -ment, sure has helped .
Kind regards swift hug from England

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Hi All: I just read this article from Mayo Clinic regarding ways to develop positive thinking. Here is part of the article.

Identifying negative thinking
Not sure if your self-talk is positive or negative? Some common forms of negative self-talk include:

Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. That evening, you focus only on your plan to do even more tasks and forget about the compliments you received.

Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.

Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.

Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to be perfect or you're a total failure.

Focusing on positive thinking. You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking.

The process is simple, but it does take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Here are some ways to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you usually think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute or a relationship. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way.

Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.

Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.

Follow a healthy lifestyle. Aim to exercise for about 30 minutes on most days of the week. You can also break it up into 10-minute chunks of time during the day. Exercise can positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel your mind and body. And learn techniques to manage stress.

Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.

Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about you. Think about things you're thankful for in your life.

Here are some examples of negative self-talk and how you can apply a positive thinking twist to them:

Putting positive thinking into practice

Negative self-talk Positive thinking
I've never done it before. It's an opportunity to learn something new.
It's too complicated. I'll tackle it from a different angle.
I don't have the resources. Necessity is the mother of invention.
I'm too lazy to get this done. I wasn't able to fit it into my schedule, but I can re-examine some priorities.
There's no way it will work. I can try to make it work.
It's too radical a change. Let's take a chance.
No one bothers to communicate with me. I'll see if I can open the channels of communication.
I'm not going to get any better at this. I'll give it another try.

Practicing positive thinking every day. If you tend to have a negative outlook, don't expect to become an optimist overnight. But with practice, eventually, your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You may also become less critical of the world around you.

When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're better able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.

What do you think about these ideas?

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@hopeful33250

Hi All: I just read this article from Mayo Clinic regarding ways to develop positive thinking. Here is part of the article.

Identifying negative thinking
Not sure if your self-talk is positive or negative? Some common forms of negative self-talk include:

Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. That evening, you focus only on your plan to do even more tasks and forget about the compliments you received.

Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.

Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.

Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to be perfect or you're a total failure.

Focusing on positive thinking. You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking.

The process is simple, but it does take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Here are some ways to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you usually think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute or a relationship. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way.

Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.

Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.

Follow a healthy lifestyle. Aim to exercise for about 30 minutes on most days of the week. You can also break it up into 10-minute chunks of time during the day. Exercise can positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel your mind and body. And learn techniques to manage stress.

Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.

Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about you. Think about things you're thankful for in your life.

Here are some examples of negative self-talk and how you can apply a positive thinking twist to them:

Putting positive thinking into practice

Negative self-talk Positive thinking
I've never done it before. It's an opportunity to learn something new.
It's too complicated. I'll tackle it from a different angle.
I don't have the resources. Necessity is the mother of invention.
I'm too lazy to get this done. I wasn't able to fit it into my schedule, but I can re-examine some priorities.
There's no way it will work. I can try to make it work.
It's too radical a change. Let's take a chance.
No one bothers to communicate with me. I'll see if I can open the channels of communication.
I'm not going to get any better at this. I'll give it another try.

Practicing positive thinking every day. If you tend to have a negative outlook, don't expect to become an optimist overnight. But with practice, eventually, your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You may also become less critical of the world around you.

When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're better able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.

What do you think about these ideas?

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Thank you for this. Positivity is a discipline for me, a hopeful way of life if I live long enough to make it a part of my reality. Easier said than done, but it merits effort. Much appreciated.

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@hopeful33250

Hi All: I just read this article from Mayo Clinic regarding ways to develop positive thinking. Here is part of the article.

Identifying negative thinking
Not sure if your self-talk is positive or negative? Some common forms of negative self-talk include:

Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones. For example, you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. That evening, you focus only on your plan to do even more tasks and forget about the compliments you received.

Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.

Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.

Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad. There is no middle ground. You feel that you have to be perfect or you're a total failure.

Focusing on positive thinking. You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking.

The process is simple, but it does take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Here are some ways to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you usually think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute or a relationship. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way.

Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.

Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.

Follow a healthy lifestyle. Aim to exercise for about 30 minutes on most days of the week. You can also break it up into 10-minute chunks of time during the day. Exercise can positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel your mind and body. And learn techniques to manage stress.

Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.

Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about you. Think about things you're thankful for in your life.

Here are some examples of negative self-talk and how you can apply a positive thinking twist to them:

Putting positive thinking into practice

Negative self-talk Positive thinking
I've never done it before. It's an opportunity to learn something new.
It's too complicated. I'll tackle it from a different angle.
I don't have the resources. Necessity is the mother of invention.
I'm too lazy to get this done. I wasn't able to fit it into my schedule, but I can re-examine some priorities.
There's no way it will work. I can try to make it work.
It's too radical a change. Let's take a chance.
No one bothers to communicate with me. I'll see if I can open the channels of communication.
I'm not going to get any better at this. I'll give it another try.

Practicing positive thinking every day. If you tend to have a negative outlook, don't expect to become an optimist overnight. But with practice, eventually, your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You may also become less critical of the world around you.

When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're better able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.

What do you think about these ideas?

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OUTSTANDING!
SUNDANCE(RB)

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@sundance6

OUTSTANDING!
SUNDANCE(RB)

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Be a tiger instead of Eeyore, keep smiling throughout it all , remove toxic waste from negative effects of people that looks down on others , remove anything that hurts and leave the path of the past behind you.keep your steps small ,goals small and if you having bad day , don't beat up yourself !!! just when you think things are going well something goes pear shape , .that is life, my dear dear older brother ended up over the holidays in hospital with Sepsis thought we might lose him, and after lost of our precious Sister last year would have been too much . ( still can't get my head let alone my heart around her leaving, she didn't know she was poorly even.) Walking in beautiful countryside and viewing precious things breathing air from hills or sea helps with your precious dogs especially , even if you are miles away from them focus on tiger he always finds a way , visual studio laughter view Laurel and hardy always makes you laugh .
Hope you enjoy your precious day ahead knowing your stronger than you think you know.....
Kind regards swift hug from us in England

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