1. < Just Want to Talk

How about a laugh, (hopefully)

Posted by Leonard @jakedduck1, Dec 31, 2018

I believe laughter is the best medicine. Laughter has actually been scientifically proven to help people with depression issues.
Let’s give it a try so we can all get happy and feel better. Many Epilepsy forums I’ve been on had joke sections. I was probably the biggest joke of all since I didn’t get a lot of the jokes. They said the jokes couldn’t be above 4th grade level for me to understand them so my jokes may be rather simplistic but let’s give it a try.
Have a lovely day everyone,
Jake

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Just Want to Talk Support Group.

Mentor
John, Volunteer Mentor | @johnbishop | Mar 8, 2021
In reply to @jakedduck1 "@contentandwell Speaking of crows, We were at the National Cemetery in San Francisco when this guy..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

@contentandwell
Speaking of crows,
We were at the National Cemetery in San Francisco when this guy mistook me for a statue.
Jake

Jump to this post

Jake @jakedduck1 - You do know that crows are really smart right? I had an IBM friend when I lived in Long Beach, California that had a pet crow that lived in a tree in his yard. It would follow his car to the different work locations and when he would take his lunch break at a city park, the crow would join him to share his bag lunch. He told me about but I didn't believe him until I met him for lunch one afternoon at a park in San Pedro and he fed the crow while I was there. It would sit on his shoulder.

REPLY
ess77 - Elizabeth | @ess77 | Mar 8, 2021

@johnbishop How lovely! Would have loved seeing that. Love such stories of human/animal/bird relationships. elixabeth

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lioness | @lioness | Mar 8, 2021

@johnbishop That story reminded me of my husband had a pet crow and they are smart

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imallears | @imallears | Mar 8, 2021

@johnbishop
That's amazing and wonderfully spooky. I usually just have mosquitos and no seeums following me.

FL Mary

REPLY
JK | @contentandwell | Mar 9, 2021
In reply to @jakedduck1 "@contentandwell Speaking of crows, We were at the National Cemetery in San Francisco when this guy..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

@contentandwell
Speaking of crows,
We were at the National Cemetery in San Francisco when this guy mistook me for a statue.
Jake

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1 I would not take kindly to a bird on my head, any type, crow, pigeon though would be the worst.
JK

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Mentor
John, Volunteer Mentor | @johnbishop | Mar 11, 2021

Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because I am there 🙂

Jobs I've Tried
1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job..
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

REPLY
5 replies
lioness | @lioness | Mar 11, 2021
In reply to @johnbishop "Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because..." + (show)
@johnbishop

Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because I am there 🙂

Jobs I've Tried
1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job..
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

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@johnbishop Lol I loved them John finally I,ll get to see family,grandson so will keep all these for our Thanksgiving talent show this year

REPLY
Lagrange 5 | @lagrange5 | Mar 11, 2021
In reply to @johnbishop "Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because..." + (show)
@johnbishop

Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because I am there 🙂

Jobs I've Tried
1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job..
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

Jump to this post

These are really very funny. Thank you!

REPLY
imallears | @imallears | Mar 11, 2021
In reply to @johnbishop "Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because..." + (show)
@johnbishop

Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because I am there 🙂

Jobs I've Tried
1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job..
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

Jump to this post

@johnbishop
Loved it and kudos to the people who come up with these witticisms .

FL Mary

REPLY
fiesty76 | @fiesty76 | Mar 12, 2021
In reply to @johnbishop "Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because..." + (show)
@johnbishop

Not my words or thoughts but it did give me a laugh at the end because I am there 🙂

Jobs I've Tried
1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job..
13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
15. SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

Jump to this post

@johnbishop, These are smilers for sure! And, yes, yes, yes to the last one! At last a perfect fit!

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