Lung Cancer and the holidays

Posted by Merry, Alumni Mentor @merpreb, Dec 19, 2018

I want to open this discussion because I know that for a lot of us holidays can be a very tough time of the year, both physically and emotionally. One of the ways that it can be a burden is knowing that a lot of people don't know how to treat us...are we considered well? Should we let her/him do this? Can she/he handle things? Many more questions arise that can be cumbersome and or funny even. And some of us don't have many people or any people to fawn over us.
In my case I have a very very over protective husband and younger sister. If I didn't ask my sister many times to stop asking me how I feel everyday I'd have to divorce her, lol. I know that "she's just concerned" but geesh, I want to look forward after 21 years of lung cancer, not look back or even at my present state. I want to be treated like nothing is wrong because reliving how I feel brings me back to times that I don't want to live again.
My husband is worse! I have spoken at length about this with him and I do give him extra room because he's taken care of me so well and completely. I have to let him feel that he is helping me in some way.
I think that friends and family need to feel some power because they feel so helpless. I let my sister drive to a shopping center to give her more of a feeling of helping me and I sit back and enjoy the ride, although I am a better driver, lol.
How do you handle these circumstances? How do you get attention if you want it or need it during the holidays? How do you avoid being a center of attention or fawned over too much?

I also want to thank you for letting me into your lives on this forum as a new mentor. You have all been so kind and welcoming. Have a wonderful holiday season. Please take care of yourselves, and maybe let someone help you, just a little bit, or ask for help if you need it!

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Lung Cancer Support Group.

Linda | @llwortman | Dec 19, 2018

Hi Merry:
I am only an 11 year lung cancer survivor. So perhaps I feel half your thoughts about the subject at hand.
At my 5 year celebration of still being alive and beating the odds, I had the honor of being invited to Dr Amit Sood’s AIT Attention Interpertstion Therapy six month course. The same lessons learned when I was in the post AIT research study after I had lung cancer surgery. Both of which were life saving.
Both the surgery & study taught me how to deal with everything you say you are dealing with because of two books Stress Free Management and Happiness by Dr Amit Sood.
I enjoy telling people “lung cancer became my blessing, and you can find out how by reading this book HAPPINESS by Dr Amit Sood!”
...the people who read the book never ask me how am I feeling, and if they do I ask, “Have you the the book I gave you?”
I have given always almost 100 of these books! They are a great gift and an easy read, but most of all teach us all how to live!
Happy Holidays,