Holiday Feelings: Are They Merry or Stressful?

Posted by Teresa, Volunteer Mentor @hopeful33250, Dec 18, 2018

We are in the middle of a holiday season marked by twinkling lights, music, movies and sentiments that are supposed to bring joy and cheer. What if you don’t feel those sentiments right now? Is that OK?

Perhaps you have experienced difficulties, maybe health problems, loss of a job, or loss of a loved one. Maybe it is not possible to work-up the holiday cheer that everyone else experiences.

What do we do with the holidays if we are not feeling cheerful and upbeat?

Let's share together what you are doing with your less-than-merry holiday feelings.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Just Want to Talk Support Group.

@hodagwi

It seems like if family makes it through the holidays, then no one will die the rest of the year. LOL Grandma died on Dec 23, my mother's birthday. Mother died on Dec 29 after a nice Christmas with her and Dad. She said don't go home because you'll just have to come back again since I won't make it to the new year and she was right. Grandpa died Jan 4. Cousin died in early December. Dad broke the trend since he passed on Sept 29. Thank goodness not all of this happened in the same year. This was in 1967, 1964, 2008, and 1997. I am thankful for every time family gets together to celebrate and see the grandkids and my brother and sisters. Usually only happens once a year. So far so good for 2018 but my UTI is still there and am being treated for it. Never a dull moment. I am now the oldest at 71. Dad was 89 so hope long life is in my jeans/genes, either way. Happy New Year.

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@hodagwi This was s bad year as my husband died on December 22 so it was rough for me but my connect family helped pull me through 2 yrs later my Mom died on Feb 2 now my brother died on April 6 different yrs but as we get older that's life

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The only thing I enjoy about holidays is first, the meaning...
Secondly, having the whole family together is a blessing. What bugs me is feeling forced to do certain things because it's a special day. Last Easter my very special dog was on his last days with bone cancer. Everyone assumed I was supposed to go about the usual BIG family dinner, all the fuss and cooking, cleaning etc. I was literally exhausted with uncontrollable emotions and sleepness nights sitting with my buddy, my pal, holding him, comforting him. Finally I just told everyone I'm not doing a thing but staying put right here with him and my husband, who's heart was literally broken. So, no one did anything. I have friends I always invite, all through the year, regardless of holidays, yet never ever ever do we get an invitation, not even to meet someplace out for a quick lunch. Yet I feel so badly not to invite them. I just dont get it...and I'm sorry for all us that feel the holidays stir up emotions. Shouldn't be that way. Personally, I'm thankful my family and I had a lovely Christmas, but I'm glad it's all over. Hubby and I are staying home new years, just us...and God willing, I'll cook us a special meal. All said...let's move on...dont look back, and pray for a healthy, peaceful 2019. Nice people here!!

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@lioness

@hodagwi This was s bad year as my husband died on December 22 so it was rough for me but my connect family helped pull me through 2 yrs later my Mom died on Feb 2 now my brother died on April 6 different yrs but as we get older that's life

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So true, @lioness. As we age, our losses multiply, don't they? You are blessed to be able to see beyond your losses and to reach out to others. Glad you are at our cyber table😊!

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@hopeful33250

So true, @lioness. As we age, our losses multiply, don't they? You are blessed to be able to see beyond your losses and to reach out to others. Glad you are at our cyber table😊!

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@hopefull33250 Thank you I do feel blessed God has always been there when I needed him the most I'm glad I can add my 2cents hope it helps you have always been so kind.Stay warm It's cold here in Calif at nights

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@lioness

@hopefull33250 Thank you I do feel blessed God has always been there when I needed him the most I'm glad I can add my 2cents hope it helps you have always been so kind.Stay warm It's cold here in Calif at nights

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I always stay warm. I live in SE Michigan and last year (after too many below zero nights) I invested in an electric blanket. It's wonderfully soothing to preheat the bed before I get in😂

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@hopeful33250

I always stay warm. I live in SE Michigan and last year (after too many below zero nights) I invested in an electric blanket. It's wonderfully soothing to preheat the bed before I get in😂

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@hopeful33250 yes it is When I lived in PA we had no heat in our bedroom but an electronic blanket ,our dog would go clear to our feet under it

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@lioness

@hopeful33250 yes it is When I lived in PA we had no heat in our bedroom but an electronic blanket ,our dog would go clear to our feet under it

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@lioness As you and I are in the same part of the country; I definitely agree with you! I may have to dig out a heavier comforter for the bed. The cat didn't want to get off the bed this morning- she had found her a nice little warm spot. This afternoon she sought me out and climbed up for a nap for about an hour and a half. That was all the prompting that I needed so we took a nap together! Should be pretty chilly and windy around here the next few days. My husband has taken himself off to Disneyland for the afternoon and evening, which is fine by me. I don't do crowds.

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an electric throw was a recent present to all 4 daughters and GF. they can sit in their chair or on a couch and plug it in and snuggle under northern WI winter temperatures.

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@gingerw

@lioness As you and I are in the same part of the country; I definitely agree with you! I may have to dig out a heavier comforter for the bed. The cat didn't want to get off the bed this morning- she had found her a nice little warm spot. This afternoon she sought me out and climbed up for a nap for about an hour and a half. That was all the prompting that I needed so we took a nap together! Should be pretty chilly and windy around here the next few days. My husband has taken himself off to Disneyland for the afternoon and evening, which is fine by me. I don't do crowds.

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@gingerw that's funny about your cat she was giving you a message I don't like crowds either sure going to be cold for those overnighters In Pasedena I,ll stay in and watch it from my cozy couch What is the name of float you worked on?

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@lioness

@gingerw that's funny about your cat she was giving you a message I don't like crowds either sure going to be cold for those overnighters In Pasedena I,ll stay in and watch it from my cozy couch What is the name of float you worked on?

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@lioness We worked on the Donate Life float. It features African drums. Theme of the parade is "Melody of Life", float is titled "Rhythm of the Heart". There are 70 floral pictographs of donors from all over the country. Yep, Tessie Belle our cat has her own fur coat, but she's a lightweight ;))
Ginger

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