Depression and Anxiety at an older age

@kla1960
Well I hope your Nero was right and you never have another seizure. It’s great to know your infection got cleared up and your abscess removed however my concern is when they did the Temporal lobe surgery whose to say no damage occurred, no scar tissue will form that may interfere in the brains electrical conduction etc. Regardless of your Neurologists opinion I communicated with people who had progressed to intractable Epilepsy and a man who died. I just don’t understand how your doctor can be so convinced. Doctors aren’t clairvoyant or Gods.I have a question regarding Topamax. As a medical professional I was curious if you ever heard the term dope-a-max in place of Topamax. It’s fairly common terminology in the Epilepsy world.
Blessings,
Jake

@lilypaws @kla1960 I wrote most of a response this morning, but I lost it somehow, and by now I don't remember what I wrote. I've done that many times, but I've never figured out what I did or how I can retrieve it.

I need to pause here and review what I wrote yesterday and your response. Be right back - if I don't mess up again.

I can understand your reluctance to find a good church. It sounds like the theology of some people is out of balance. So many people have no clue what to say to a hurting person. I made a list of 30+ things NOT to say, many of which have been said to me. I feel fortunate to have found a good church with a great staff, where I don't hear that kind of nonsense. We had been going to a different church for 9 years, started going there because I knew the pastor years earlier. Unfortunately, his preaching became increasingly negative, so we talked with him about it, and it was better - for a month. We stuck it out for a year, because my wife didn't want to leave behind friends, and she was a board member and led worship. Because of my poor mental health, I had to find another church. I couldn't take being spiritually attacked every Sunday.

Anyway, I'm in a better place now, both mentally and spiritually. A positive worship environment, a (mostly) patient and supportive wife, a service dog who always keeps me in sight when I'm working in the yard, and 13 therapists in the past 14 years.

Medications - Wellbutrin and Mirtazapine for depression, Klonopin (aka Clonazepam) for anxiety, for neuropathy pain I have a spinal cord stimulator, and take morphine sulfate contin and Imipramine, for arthritis I take Meloxicam and Tylenol, for reflux there's Omeprazole, plus various vitamins and allergy meds. When my back really hurts from overdoing whatever, I have Percocet and Orphenadrine (muscle relaxer). I have back pain because my ladder dumped me, 12' up, painting my house. Compression fractures at T12 and L2. And after a couple of days in the hospital I found out that I also had broken my arm.

My best therapy is working in my yard. It's pretty much a full time job from April to October. We have 10 acres, with most of it in pasture, which we lease to our neighbors for their cows and horses. In exchange they deal with the irrigation and are improving the pasture. They're good Christian people who watch out for us. When we bought this place, we rented it to a local veterinarian who did absolutely nothing to the yard, so I started from scratch. I think I've created a monster. Now I'm trying to find ways to make it lower maintenance. Having underground sprinklers would be a huge help.

I've done it again, haven't I. It's time for sleep. I'll check in tomorrow.

Jim

I enjoy getting to know you Jake. You are right. I know what you know. I have a mini plate and screws in my skull from the craniotomy. I read my OR report. Part of my skull was removed. My neuro said I could have scar tissue etc. I have never had a seizure involving loss of consciousness etc. Absolutely the 400mg of topomax was too much. As the taper was going on and after its completion my cognition judgement reasoning etc improved again. I also experienced neuroplasticity in the summer and fall of 2014 . The craniotomy was done may 2014. I did my best to cooperate with this process- eat healthier exercise etc. Yes I can have another seizure. Especially in this time of sars cov 2. I see my neuro yearly and she said no more eegs

@kia1960 Yes Kia, going off of Klonopin without tappering can cause a seizure. My daughter, I think it was Klonopin, but I know it was an anti-anxiety med. She was taken off of it cold turkey and she had a seizure. She had all kinds of tests but all came out ok. So it had to be going off the med to fast. But, if you taper you will be ok.

I suffer from anxiety and depression as well. I have taken the medications you have spoken of to no avail. I mam currently taking Lorazepam, Buproprion, Venlafaxine and Mirtazapine. . The Lorazepam is like Xanax and Mirtazapine is like Trazodone, for sleep. I have been on this regiment for approximately 8 months. I went through a phase of fainting spells when getting up to fast and a fullness or tightness on left side of chest. I was physically checked out to be medically fit, so anxiety issue there. I currently sleep well and feel normal until about 1 pm. The anxiety comes back at that time every day and after taking two Lorazepam it dissipates. I have a psych appt this week to discuss increased anxiety after 1 pm. I wish there was one pill which took care of everything, however until then will continue the current regiment. I hope this serves of some help to you and stay the course.

@douglasebaker I take Bupropion 450mg in the morning. It's the only antidepressant that has worked for me since 2006. A couple of years ago I told my psychiatrist that I was gradually becoming more depressed, so he prescribed Mirtazapine as an add-on. So far they're doing the trick. I take Klonopin, 1mg at bedtime, with the option of taking a second one if needed. I take other meds for other reasons, mostly chronic pain control, but I have to be vigilant about interactions.

I just scrolled up through the posts and see that I already said all of this and more. Oh well. Chalk it up to my seniority. Some people say that we should just quit psychotropics and think healthy, spiritual thoughts. I don't have any problem with knowing that I'll most likely take some antidepressants the rest of my life. That's way better than the mess I'd be in without them. The truth is that I would have committed suicide. So, I'm grateful for medications that keep me functioning.

Jim

Good morning. You and I have much in common. I am 76, a widow and dealing with a small farm solo. Lifetime anxiety and depression BUT with meds and learning to accept my illness, life has gotten better....most days. When I get to a day when I feel joyless, ache all over and wonder what the point is, then feel immense guilt over that, I do this: go to YouTube and search out my favorite music videos (for me it goes from La Boheme to Queen) and just take in the sound and action until I am motivated to move out of my chair; choose three things to do ( like feed the dogs, brush my teeth and take my meds); then pick three more things, starting with a thing I resist doing (like cleaning out the rabbit room). After a while, I hit on something that captures my attention and I stick with it, leading to a feeling of accomplishment. Know this, though - these are short term fixes. We will have our anxiety and aches from now on. When they get too much for me, I just surrender to them. Not defeat, surrender. As a Christian, you know the difference between these two words. Bless you and may you keep on "keeping on."

@douglasebaker Good for you. You are one who are taking care of yourself. I had a big surgery on June 9th a 9 hour fusion. I was doing fine with my depression and anxiety. I am not suppose to bend, twist, or pick up things to heavy. If my husband sees me that I might bend a little he yells at me. Now I am having depression and anxiety. It's bad enough to have to wear the brace, which really isn't that bad, but I don't feel like I am bending like he shows me. I have working on not bending, but it's really hard. I have soft bones and could pull out a screw or break a rod.. So maybe he needs to get on me. Otherwise, he has been so good to me by helping me out. I'm on Lexapro and Klonopin and Ambiem if I can't sleep, but I mainly use melatonin and 1 or 2 Klonoping.

Having a bar in my upper back for 50 years (scoliosis), I too am forbidden bending. But sometimes.... so when my lower back gets really bad I rest, use the head pad and knit. The S-curve has now replicated itself in my lower back, so this is a daily problem and with a small farm to run solo, a challenge. I use a "grabber" to get stuff off the floor, hire out bending chores, and take ibuprofen AND Tylenol at night (OK'd by doc). Ambien was not a good fit for me. I got up and sleep-walked to the freezer and woke up with a melted quart of vanilla ice cream on my belly. Good luck and keep in touch.

I'm 61 and very bored and lonely. Depression and OCD all my life. Never really fit in anywhere. My siblings won't contact me! I'm Catholic and Mass and my faith keep me going. But the parish knows I'm mentally ill and don't call me either. Stigma is terrible! Hope my reward is in Heaven. Maria.