drug-resistant depression (DRD)

@godsgirl

Welcome, God's girl. Many of us have been dealing with treatment resistant depression over the long term. I tried quite a few antidepressants before landing on Wellbutrin. I was approved for ECT several years ago, but I live 150 miles from the nearest facility that gives the treatment, and after trying for weeks to figure out the logistics, I gave up on it. It was too overwhelming for me. My wife was opposed to it, which made it worse.

Chronic pain from neuropathy in my feet has been contributing to the depression. I finally had a spinal cord stimulator implant in June of 2017, and after a few adjustments over the course of six months, it has reduced the pain to a bearable level. I take morphine sulfate contin for the pain, and sometimes add oxycodone to it.

Recently my psychiatrist added Mirtazapine, because I was feeling more depressed, and it's helped. I have taken Klonopin for 12 years for anxiety, as well.

I've had weekly therapy since 2006, except for 18 months in 2016 and the first part of 2017. By April I was pretty desperate, very depressed and suicidal, and the new therapist put me in the first opening.

I had to retire from the ministry when I was 56, because of depression, anxiety, PTSD and suicidal ideation. I understand how much it hurts to live with mental pain for a long time. It's very difficult for me because as a pastor, I was expected to have it together, and people abandoned me when I needed them most. I talk with the therapist nearly every week about the guilt I feel that I think I shouldn't feel because of my Christian faith.

Getting ahead of my pain helped me dig out of the dark hole I had fallen into last year, along with therapy and medications.

I've tried in the past to add a secondary medication that would augment the Wellbutrin, one of them Abilify, but they didn't have any effect. Adding Mirtazapine (Remeron) is the first time a secondary medication has helped reduce depression.

Can you tell us what you've tried that has been helpful, even a little bit? Have you tried marijuana or an alternative treatment? Is transcranial or ECT accessable?

There are some discussions that might be of interest to you in the mental health group. There's one that's specifically about long term depression.

I think you'll find support, information and people with common interests here. I'm glad you found the group.

Jim

Thank you for sharing with me. Prozac was the best for me I was on it for 8 years then it just stopped working. I have been on celexa, Prozac, Wellbutrin, remeron (made me sleep too much) Lexapro, Zoloft, Cymbalta, Effexor, pristique, buspirone. Haven't tried marijuana, i'm already tired with no energy. ECT probably isn't the most handy thing for me, I would have to travel a ways however I wouldn't have to go to far for the ketamine. Just wondering about long
term effects? It seems the older I get the worse my depression is and now I have anxiety on top of it. Doesn't help that my last child just graduated and moved out :/ proud mom that my kids are living on their own and doing good just hard for me to have a empty house and no identity anymore 🙁

I have the same issue. Meds rarely help. ECT did not help. ENLYTE has helped. (I've posted about ENLYTE.) but my life situation took a turn for the worse last week and I guess that sent me over the top.

@godsgirl1969

Our son moved to Indiana around 15 years ago, and our daughter left home maybe 9 years ago. I have to admit that we all breathed sighs of relief when our son left. He was very high maintenance.

Have your doctors worked with combining antidepressants? I know most of us don't want to take more meds, but they certainly serve a purpose, and can make it possible to live a more normal life.

Do you have any outside activities? I know that the things I do at church and other places help me maintain some level of stability.

Do you have a counselor? I know how important it is for me to be able to talk with someone. Do you have family close by? I wish I did.

Jim

@georgette12

Do you want to talk about what turned your life on its head?

Jim

Talking helps. My husband lost his job due to health. Heart and severe asthma. He is the breadwinner. Also last week it coincided with deceased son's birthday and suicide. Darkness just kind of enveloped me. Serious financial fear. Fear of how to live. I think, though, the worst fear is fear of losing my grip on my mental health.

Tomorrow, Thursday, I see both my psychiatrist and therapist. I really don't think they can help anyway.

Hi @georgette12

Bless your heart. I wish it was within my power to help you, and I will keep you in my prayers. I know we all have different stories, but we can provide support. Anytime you feel like sharing and just letting go of all your situations and feelings, you are welcome to use me as a sounding friend. All of us have different bottoms we fit into, and when that happens, hope is our saving grace. Please find hope from your professional doctors/therapists, and your life will gradually get better. To bad we don't understand why bad things happen, but when we recover, we are much stronger and happier. Helping others will help you.

charlie75

Thank you to each of you who respond so kindly. It does help. I truly thought I was getting better and I was. But the events of just my husband sick and son having died just put me over the edge I guess.

May God watch over you, @georgette12.