Does anyone feel old and useless with age?

@ray666 Good information. It seems like our circle of support is smaller and that is who we gob to ! Need to venture out!

I’m an 82 year old female with a few health issues of my own. I live with my husband of 60+ years and I have 4 sons who all live in various places across the country but all far away. I also have 5 grandchildren ranging from 11 to 24. My husband is estranged from 3 sons and seldom talks or communicates with the 4th one.
Anyhow, I have a cell phone and text with the grandkids. They don’t always respond but that’s ok. They still know I’m thinking of them and eventually send a note. I text or talk to all sons regularly.
I have a small shop on Etsy that keeps me quite busy so I’m very blessed.
To feel more useful to society, several years ago, I called the local nursing home to say I’d like to send birthday cards to the residents. The activities director was very happy to hear that and sent me a list up upcoming birthdays. It seemed to me that getting one card wasn’t very exciting so I asked at my church if they could put something in the bulletin asking for volunteers to also send cards. They did that so I now have 11 people sending cards each month. I contact the home each month for the list for upcoming month and once I get it, I email it to the other volunteers.
So even if we’re introverts, we can still help others. Many of us are blessed to still be in our own homes but those in nursing homes aren’t as fortunate so find a way to brighten their days. A random note, asking for donations of puzzle books at your church for the nursing home or actually visiting the home and visiting or playing games with residents. Find a way to help others and you’ll find that it helps you as well.

Wow, Ray!

So sorry to hear of your efforts to re-connect with old friends... what SAD news!

Hang in there... you're much braver, bigger and more with it than they are. Congrats!

Don't lose that vibe.

All the best!

/LarryG

@larryg333
I'll not lose that vibe, Larry. I promise! Something tells me you've got that vibe, too. Hang on to it with a good, firm grip, Larry. Once you lose it, it's hard to recover.

Here's wishing you the best weekend ever!
Cheers!
Ray (@ray666)

@bjk3
Hi, Barb

Ah, yes, re-animate and re-populate! I talk big, don't I? 🙂 I'm not that good myself when it comes to the re-animation and re-population business. I wish I were better at it. My therapist is always asking, "Well, Ray, how did you do with re-animating an re-populating your life since I last saw you?" I'm always left with either lying ("Since I last saw you? Oh, fantastic!") or telling the truth ("Not so good"). But I'm tank-full of best of intentions. My PN balance is forever tripping me up. (You can take that either way: figuratively or literally.) I still find myself clutching when a friend proposes some insane, crazy-beyond-belief adventure, like meeting for a cup of coffee at the coffee shop three blocks from home, or seeing a movie together at the neighborhood theater that has lots of handicap parking. But next week? Ah, next week! Next week will be better. Next week I'll take gold at re-animating my life and least bronze when it comes to re-populating it. 🙂

Have a wonderful weekend, Barb!
Cheers!
Ray (@ray666)

[Barb: If you receive this reply twice, that's my goof!]

Hi, Barb (@bjk3)

Ah, yes, re-animate and re-populate! I talk big, don't I? 🙂 I'm not that good myself when it comes to the re-animation and re-population business. I wish I were better at it. My therapist is always asking, "Well, Ray, how did you do with re-animating an re-populating your life since I last saw you?" I'm always left with either lying ("Since I last saw you? Oh, fantastic!") or telling the truth ("Not so good"). But I'm tank-full of best intentions. My PN balance is forever tripping me up. (You can take that either way: figuratively or literally.) I still find myself clutching when a friend proposes some insane, crazy-beyond-belief adventure, like meeting for a cup of coffee at the coffee shop three blocks from home, or seeing a movie together at the neighborhood theater that has lots of handicap parking. But next week? Ah, next week! Next week will be better. Next week I'll take gold at re-animating my life and least bronze when it comes to re-populating it. 🙂

Have a wonderful weekend, Barb!
Cheers!
Ray (@ray666)

"Warm" greetings, Ray (@ray666) ~ Are you wishing for jacket weather, too?
It seems (to me, anyway) that you might be asking just a tad more of yourself than you could, given the traumas you've endured in the 3 short years that I've known you via Connect. Let's see -- having an incurable condition (PN) upend a career you really enjoyed, dealing with some scary and life-altering months of Sepsis, moving, and then the shock and loss of your life partner, which hasn't even been a year ago yet. I'm not saying you shouldn't have goals or work on the healing that your wonderful counselor is helping you through. Quite the opposite. I find myself panicking at some of the same invitations that you described, and I opt for Zoom meetings almost exclusively even when the in-person gatherings are right here in town. I know my limits and what's safest in the long run and I'll gladly accept a ribbon for participation. Besides, it doesn't take up any room on the trophy shelf and can double as a bookmark, thereby cutting down on dusting & decluttering, and finding a use, as well. Two birds with one stone - at least! 😃
You have built into a bunch of lives here, all with recuperation and recovery in your own. No need to wait till next week to claim that gold and at least bronze.

Cheers, Ray!! 😄 ~~ Barb

@loonylady For many years I delivered birthday cards to local nursing homes in Woodland, NorCal. During the 1980s. Always wrote little note in each one, trying to personalize it a little. The home directors always happy to provide me w/monthly lists. Can’t recommend this enough as a way to make lonely lives (inc. mine) a tiny bit brighter. Especially now in this time of upheaval and reliance on electronic communications. Kudos to you and best wishes.

@westwoman3698 Thank you so much for your comments. I, too, try to include a short note and I usually point out that they don’t know me as I don’t want to frustrate anyone trying to figure out who I am. I type the notes which isn’t quite as personal but I also try to add a little joke and a word search puzzle. Those are available for free online. I’m hoping it truly does brighten the days of the recipients. I appreciate your thoughts and wish you well.

And, how are you, Ray ? I know you would be an interesting friend. Those people are just missing out, don’t you know !