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How do I live, when I have chronic pain in every part of my body ?
Hello, my name is Christina. I am 57 years old, married, 2 sons. At 24 I was diagnosed with an anular tear on my spine. I underwent a spinal fusion,I have metal rods, screws, a cage and more. The surgery was unsuccessful. After that I had years of injections, fusions, all types of therapies, and many surgical procedures i lost count, I also had a neuro stimulator. Nothing helped. My sons were 4 and 6 when I began w this pain and I can’t remember 1 day not being in pain since. I suffered through all their sports events, school functions, our vacations, their bday parties , holidays and more.
Ten years ago I was diagnosed with knee arthritis which is the most excruciating pain as well. Injection helped 1st time. After that I went to therapy, saw several drs, had different injections, nothing has helped.
Two years ago I began to feel over all body aches even my skin hurt to the touch. Diagnosis,,,fibromyalgia.. 😢. 1 year ago i began w numbness, burning, severe leg cramps, overall leg pain,,diagnosis…bulging disc.
I live hour by hour , day by day, I do not go anywhere due to my severe pain.
Back in the 90’s I was given all kinds of opioids for my back pain. Being so young and clueless of the dangers I took them and was pain free. Until I began needing more and more and realizing I was becoming dependent on them. Addicted actually. So I stopped. Withdrawals were HORRIBLE! I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE..
Now I’m afraid to take any opioids at all. I hv tried prescription anti inflammatories, muscle relaxants, nerve pain med ( caused severe anxiety) and so many others.
I take medication for depression and anxiety due to this stressful life I live.
8 years ago I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. Gland was removed. My tsh levels fluctuate making me feel worse.
I truly have a very limited quality of life.
I feel this is so long and I apologize. Theres just so much history and what saddens me is that I’m worse than I was 30 years ago and no Dr seems to be able to help me.
I cannot imagine living like this for 10, 20 more years. Everything I do is a struggle and so exhausting.
I feel I will only have peace and be pain free until the day I leave this earth. I am not suicidal. The love I have for the husband, sons and parents Is so much more stronger than my pain. And believe me the pain is EXTREMELY DEBILITATING. My LOVE…EVEN STRONGER.
How do I live like this? Is anyone out there going thru pain like me?
I hope I get a reply. I am beyond depressed, frustrated and dread the mornings knowing what my day will be like.
Thank you for reading this.
Christina from Texas
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Christina, I am so sorry to hear of your prolonged and unimaginable suffering. I am glad you are surrounded by family whom you love and care for so deeply that it helps you face each day. I don’t know if you have ever tried acupuncture, but perhaps it would give you some relief. I have used it and had some positive outcomes for pain. It takes a few sessions. Continued prayers for you, Christina. 🙏❤️🙏
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3 ReactionsI’m sorry to hear all your struggles. Well I haven’t gone through a lot of the things you have. I also have current chronic constant chronic pain many areas of my body and now I’ve developed some dizziness symptoms that keep me off balance and making just regular activities challenging. Have you ever tried the Curable app? It’s a great resource lots of things to read. Lots of exercises. Lots of community with people who have both structural and neuroplastic pain. Highly recommended and I think you can get a free trial.
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1 ReactionI understand completely. I have severe pain in my right buttock. It hurts to sit . I constantly sit on ice. I don't go anywhere either because of the pain. In the past 2 years a had broken ankle , fractured hip, and presently fractured femur above my knee. All in the left side . I am extremely anxious and depressed. I wake up feeling like you do. I am not suicidal either. I am a devout catholic. Maybe we can befriend each other.
Marlie
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4 ReactionsThis may sound crazy but you could see a menopause specialist, a doctor who has been specifically trained in this area, not just any Ob/gyn. Hormone therapy, including testosterone may help your symptoms. May want to look into "musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause."
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1 Reaction@penny21
Thank you for taking the time to reply. You are so thoughtful and kind. God Bless You. Your words meant a lot to me 🙏❤️
Christina
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2 ReactionsChristina
You sound just like .me. I don't like to start another day. I am trying to keep the faith . Prayers for you.
Mary
Christina, I hear you and your pain. I am 81 yrs old and live with horrible pain I try to hide from my family. I believe you when you say you are not suicidal.But I think your meds for depression could be improved. I hope and pray you will get the help you desperately need
Yes I am right there with you. And I keep getting new fun stuff like OLP which I’ve had for a year WO remission. I too have been on opioids and detoxed. Only I’ve detoxed 7 times trying to live in the pain . I cannot. My life is better with opioids
And yes it is a giant double edged sword. I try every modality suggested but unfortunately I am now in maintenance survival mode and I don’t want to die just do t know how I can live like this.
Maybe it’s been a little shorter time my has only been 18 yrs . I’m 68 so closer to the end but truly understand all your issue - mental ones too. My new goal is to try and not complain but it is difficult when I move and yet something else hurts.
I guess I’m happy to read your post. We can only support each other knowing our life sucks and yet we have so much to live for! Hang on and know you are not alone.
I live with chronic pain too, and while my situation is different, I understand the exhaustion and grief that comes from decades of pain and failed treatments. What has helped me most is focusing on one day at a time, celebrating small victories, leaning on loved ones, and continuing to seek pain-management and mental-health support, because even when the pain remains, having support can make carrying it a little easier. ❤️
@suecutuli do the opioids actually give you relief, I have nerve pain and I’ve tried Percocet and Buprenorphine without any success in relieving the pain!