@gliderguy I know exactly what you're saying. My markers are not favorable and it had me checking insurance policies. The mental strain is worse than the physical challenges for sure. It took me about 8 weeks post diagnosis to get out of a local hem/onc office and to my CLL specialist's. The difference in knowledge and expertise was stark. The local doctor painted a fairly bleak picture and talked of failing FCR treatment and Richters Transformation while the specialist talked of heterogeneous disease progression, active surveillance and a "near normal life expectancy" and a low chance of Richters. My W&W was just shy of a year and 18 cycles into a clinical trial I feel wonderful. I think it's safe to say most of us need about 6 months to process the diagnosis and arrive at acceptance, but with your markers it's pretty likely you'll die with this disease vice from it. My advice, find a "CLL specialist" you feel comfortable with and begin the long journey together. The disease progresses reasonably slowly for most and the new drugs are quite amazing. All the best.