Dear @tracidw ,

I am so very sorry to hear of your mother's suffering. I accompanied my mother through her last weeks of life from cancer. I am wondering about your hospice service. It was my impression that you could count on them to keep your loved one pain-free. That is definitely not happening for your mother. Are they trying to balance pain relief with some other objective? Do they think that you have set a different guideline for her care? Have you ant they talked clearly about what the objective is for her care at this time?

I don't know, of course, what your mother documented about end of life wishes. At this point I assume that you are in charge of her medical decisions. It sounds like you want her to have a peaceful, pain free death; you also do not want her life prolonged. That is what my mother wanted and she got both of those things through carefully administered morphine. There may be other ways.

A dear friend chose to take no more food or water. He did this to end his illness in the hospital with full pain management.

Please talk to the hospice provider and, if necessary change that provider. I am haunted by the less than peaceful death of one of our dogs, There is no way I want the kind of suffering you and she are going through when one of my relatives dies. Please update us. We are thinking of you!