@abosier65
For me it was a therapist who used psychoanalysis and I think he favored Jung. Online groups have also been very helpful like CoDA online. It takes time but is worth it.
@sallyo420 coda helped me early on especially reading Melodie Beattie's books and doing DBT therapy. But now many years later I'm in a better place with that any my issues have changed. Trying to find a doc that doesn't just do scripts but actual pyschoanalsis.
@gravity3 I've been hearing about EMDR. I'm trying to find that type of psych doc in my health plan bc the doc I have basically does nothing but wrote scripts
Go to EMDR.com
They have a search function that will help you search for a trained EMDR clinician. If you find some that are included in your plan make sure you interview them to see how experienced they are and whether they have experience with the types of issues that you have.
To all who replied to my first post! A follow up! Ironically, my Neurologist scheduled an Emergency MRI for me, concerned about my signs and symptoms, after I had posted about being afraid of having a stroke! The MRI revealed that I had an old and a recent ischemic, luner stroke! So, I have had 2 strokes, and, because of A-fib diagnosis, last month Boston Scientifics “The Watchman”, was implanted in my heart, by my electrophysiologist, and I was put on Eloquis blood 🩸 thinner medicine!
@foundryrat743 SO not “all in your head”, eh! I wonder what your loving brother would say to that - although you would do best to give him a wide berth anyway!
@foundryrat743 SO not “all in your head”, eh! I wonder what your loving brother would say to that - although you would do best to give him a wide berth anyway!
@rashida It’s difficult to understand my brother’s intentions, or reasoning, at times. I suspect he could be a high functioning person, with a spectrum disorder! With that in mind, along with his unsupportive remarks, I feel that he may be pushing me away!
I think he doesn’t want to hear about my health problems, because. he seems to be infatuated with my sister, who looks like, and acts a lot like our Mom. My brother was what you might say ‘a momma’s boy’! My Mom and I had a completely different relationship, then my brother had, with my Mom. I left home in my senior high school year, because my parents both physically and emotionally abused me! I had to live in an unfinished basement, at home, while my brothers and sisters had their own rooms. My parents did not physically abuse my brothers or sisters. I did not invite my parents to my high school, or college graduations. My parents never gave me a penny for college, and would not sign any college loan papers for me!! I put myself through college, with scholarships, and worked 2 part time jobs! My parents signed college loan papers and paid for most of my brother’s college education, all the way through law school! He is a very successful lawyer, who takes good care of my sister’s needs. She is divorced, retired, and lives in an apartment, living alone! So, that’s the background, and my brother criticizes me, and never, ever, criticizes my sister. I reckon he must really not care about me, or my well being! My sister is a hypochondriac, who, perhaps because she is overweight, uses a cane, and travels in a wheelchair, but has no physician’s diagnosis, to support a disability. So, my brother always seems so concerned with her well-being. She complains quite often. If she doesn’t want to do something, she complains that she has a headache! I was diagnosed with migraine headaches many years ago, and was. prescribed medicine! The vascular migraines that I get , occasionally, can be very debilitating, yet I seldom complain! Who knows why my brother may think I’m exaggerating, or that he may think that ‘it’s all in my head’! I have all the proof needed, including my Mayo Clinic diagnosis, to prove all of my ailments, and my daughter sent a picture of. me, lying in my hospital bed, recently, when I was hospitalized for my heart implant! I, originally, did not know this, but my sister called my daughter, and asked her to take a picture of me in the hospital, and send that picture to. her, and my brother. My sister is a master manipulator! So, my daughter obliged. Sorry about the long diatribe, but there is such a background of the way that I was raised, compared to my brother and sister, and, perhaps, that has a lot to do with why they both feel they can denigrate me, at will! I was not part of their lives, too much, before my Mom died, tragically! Perhaps it would be best if I walked away from them both!!
@rashida It’s difficult to understand my brother’s intentions, or reasoning, at times. I suspect he could be a high functioning person, with a spectrum disorder! With that in mind, along with his unsupportive remarks, I feel that he may be pushing me away!
I think he doesn’t want to hear about my health problems, because. he seems to be infatuated with my sister, who looks like, and acts a lot like our Mom. My brother was what you might say ‘a momma’s boy’! My Mom and I had a completely different relationship, then my brother had, with my Mom. I left home in my senior high school year, because my parents both physically and emotionally abused me! I had to live in an unfinished basement, at home, while my brothers and sisters had their own rooms. My parents did not physically abuse my brothers or sisters. I did not invite my parents to my high school, or college graduations. My parents never gave me a penny for college, and would not sign any college loan papers for me!! I put myself through college, with scholarships, and worked 2 part time jobs! My parents signed college loan papers and paid for most of my brother’s college education, all the way through law school! He is a very successful lawyer, who takes good care of my sister’s needs. She is divorced, retired, and lives in an apartment, living alone! So, that’s the background, and my brother criticizes me, and never, ever, criticizes my sister. I reckon he must really not care about me, or my well being! My sister is a hypochondriac, who, perhaps because she is overweight, uses a cane, and travels in a wheelchair, but has no physician’s diagnosis, to support a disability. So, my brother always seems so concerned with her well-being. She complains quite often. If she doesn’t want to do something, she complains that she has a headache! I was diagnosed with migraine headaches many years ago, and was. prescribed medicine! The vascular migraines that I get , occasionally, can be very debilitating, yet I seldom complain! Who knows why my brother may think I’m exaggerating, or that he may think that ‘it’s all in my head’! I have all the proof needed, including my Mayo Clinic diagnosis, to prove all of my ailments, and my daughter sent a picture of. me, lying in my hospital bed, recently, when I was hospitalized for my heart implant! I, originally, did not know this, but my sister called my daughter, and asked her to take a picture of me in the hospital, and send that picture to. her, and my brother. My sister is a master manipulator! So, my daughter obliged. Sorry about the long diatribe, but there is such a background of the way that I was raised, compared to my brother and sister, and, perhaps, that has a lot to do with why they both feel they can denigrate me, at will! I was not part of their lives, too much, before my Mom died, tragically! Perhaps it would be best if I walked away from them both!!
@foundryrat743 definitely would be best to walk away from both of them - let them drag each other down! Did you get a chance to watch the video I sent you in my last reply?
@foundryrat743 definitely would be best to walk away from both of them - let them drag each other down! Did you get a chance to watch the video I sent you in my last reply?
@rashida Yes, I watched that video, with my wife! i wrote down the points, and could see where I did the right thing, by setting boundaries, and times, to suit my schedule, rather than what my brother wanted! Also, the Company that made that great video that you sent, made another one, on You Tube, that I watched, and it too, was very helpful! My wife agrees with you! Interestingly, she has told me many times that they both drag me down to much, treating me in an inferior way, like I had been treated, at home, by my parents! Thinking about what your advice is, I recall recently attempting to tell my brother how, after all these years, my knee still hurts, and I have a bowed leg problem, where my Orthopedic Doc. prescribed my using a cane, which I do use - when my Dad, in a rage, threw me down the basement steps, in my senior year of high school. It was unexpected! He had a fight with my Mom, and came down from upstairs, to the landing, where I was standing, gathering up some clothes from the dryer, on that level of their split level home! My Dad was very. strong, and I guess I was in his way, going to the garage door, on the landing! I landed on the basement cement, and my rt. knee blew up like a balloon. I was in a lot of pain. My Mom and Dad would not come and help me or take me to the hospital. I was screaming in pain! My younger sister called my married sister, who came and took me to hospital, where they did an arthroscopic procedure, and I was on crutches for a few months! I stayed at my elder sister’s home and a friend’s the rest of my senior year! i never returned home! Anyway, I’ve had a painful, ‘trick’ knee, ever since, that has given out from under me, and I’ve had some falls! So, my brother was about 10 years old at the time, when my Dad injured me. When I told him that my sore knee was contributing to some of my recent falls, he inserted ‘Oh, Perry, ( my youngest brother - 7 years old at the time), and I, sat upstairs, laughing at Dad beating you up, and you crying out in pain!! “ What a terrible thing that was, to say to me, his oldest brother! I truly need all the support I can get. Non-supportive family members, who act nonchalantly narcissistic ( sister ), or criticize ( brother ), like this, make it much harder for me to have the strength and fortitude to persevere in the aggressive manner, that I am doing right now. to improve my physical health, and overall well being! Like my wife says, I need to stick with a positive environment, not a negative one! Being with, and/or communicating with people, who lift me up, rather than keeping relationships with people who are negative toward me, bringing me down, is definitely the way to go! My wife likes your comment, and, of course, so do I, when you stated “let them drag each other down!” I keep telling myself that, and let them deal with their negativity, but it’s time for me to exit the scene, and keep only positive relationships! You have been such a great help for me, concerning my problems, with my siblings! You reached out to help me, when I needed help the most! I’m eternally grateful to you, for your wise counsel, as a friend, with this wonderful Mayo Connect forum! YOU ARE A BLESSING, and I deeply appreciate you taking your valuable time to help me!!
I recommend trying some CBD oil - go slowly at first to see how you tolerate it, Doses of 5mg at a time, several times a day, then up to 10 20 or even 30mg - caution can affect ability to operate machinery, careful with driving until you know how you're reacting.
@sallyo420 coda helped me early on especially reading Melodie Beattie's books and doing DBT therapy. But now many years later I'm in a better place with that any my issues have changed. Trying to find a doc that doesn't just do scripts but actual pyschoanalsis.
@abosier65 That time has long past unfortunately. Psychiatrists used to do both and actually spend time getting to know you.
Now you see someone that prescribes medication or someone that keeps you coming back like a chiropractor.
I wish you luck.
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@sallyo420 coda helped me early on especially reading Melodie Beattie's books and doing DBT therapy. But now many years later I'm in a better place with that any my issues have changed. Trying to find a doc that doesn't just do scripts but actual pyschoanalsis.
@abosier65
Go to EMDR.com
They have a search function that will help you search for a trained EMDR clinician. If you find some that are included in your plan make sure you interview them to see how experienced they are and whether they have experience with the types of issues that you have.
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1 Reaction@sash - when you mentioned TMS, are you referring to Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation?
@foundryrat743 SO not “all in your head”, eh! I wonder what your loving brother would say to that - although you would do best to give him a wide berth anyway!
@rashida It’s difficult to understand my brother’s intentions, or reasoning, at times. I suspect he could be a high functioning person, with a spectrum disorder! With that in mind, along with his unsupportive remarks, I feel that he may be pushing me away!
I think he doesn’t want to hear about my health problems, because. he seems to be infatuated with my sister, who looks like, and acts a lot like our Mom. My brother was what you might say ‘a momma’s boy’! My Mom and I had a completely different relationship, then my brother had, with my Mom. I left home in my senior high school year, because my parents both physically and emotionally abused me! I had to live in an unfinished basement, at home, while my brothers and sisters had their own rooms. My parents did not physically abuse my brothers or sisters. I did not invite my parents to my high school, or college graduations. My parents never gave me a penny for college, and would not sign any college loan papers for me!! I put myself through college, with scholarships, and worked 2 part time jobs! My parents signed college loan papers and paid for most of my brother’s college education, all the way through law school! He is a very successful lawyer, who takes good care of my sister’s needs. She is divorced, retired, and lives in an apartment, living alone! So, that’s the background, and my brother criticizes me, and never, ever, criticizes my sister. I reckon he must really not care about me, or my well being! My sister is a hypochondriac, who, perhaps because she is overweight, uses a cane, and travels in a wheelchair, but has no physician’s diagnosis, to support a disability. So, my brother always seems so concerned with her well-being. She complains quite often. If she doesn’t want to do something, she complains that she has a headache! I was diagnosed with migraine headaches many years ago, and was. prescribed medicine! The vascular migraines that I get , occasionally, can be very debilitating, yet I seldom complain! Who knows why my brother may think I’m exaggerating, or that he may think that ‘it’s all in my head’! I have all the proof needed, including my Mayo Clinic diagnosis, to prove all of my ailments, and my daughter sent a picture of. me, lying in my hospital bed, recently, when I was hospitalized for my heart implant! I, originally, did not know this, but my sister called my daughter, and asked her to take a picture of me in the hospital, and send that picture to. her, and my brother. My sister is a master manipulator! So, my daughter obliged. Sorry about the long diatribe, but there is such a background of the way that I was raised, compared to my brother and sister, and, perhaps, that has a lot to do with why they both feel they can denigrate me, at will! I was not part of their lives, too much, before my Mom died, tragically! Perhaps it would be best if I walked away from them both!!
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1 Reaction@foundryrat743 definitely would be best to walk away from both of them - let them drag each other down! Did you get a chance to watch the video I sent you in my last reply?
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Helpful -
Hug
2 Reactions@rashida Yes, I watched that video, with my wife! i wrote down the points, and could see where I did the right thing, by setting boundaries, and times, to suit my schedule, rather than what my brother wanted! Also, the Company that made that great video that you sent, made another one, on You Tube, that I watched, and it too, was very helpful! My wife agrees with you! Interestingly, she has told me many times that they both drag me down to much, treating me in an inferior way, like I had been treated, at home, by my parents! Thinking about what your advice is, I recall recently attempting to tell my brother how, after all these years, my knee still hurts, and I have a bowed leg problem, where my Orthopedic Doc. prescribed my using a cane, which I do use - when my Dad, in a rage, threw me down the basement steps, in my senior year of high school. It was unexpected! He had a fight with my Mom, and came down from upstairs, to the landing, where I was standing, gathering up some clothes from the dryer, on that level of their split level home! My Dad was very. strong, and I guess I was in his way, going to the garage door, on the landing! I landed on the basement cement, and my rt. knee blew up like a balloon. I was in a lot of pain. My Mom and Dad would not come and help me or take me to the hospital. I was screaming in pain! My younger sister called my married sister, who came and took me to hospital, where they did an arthroscopic procedure, and I was on crutches for a few months! I stayed at my elder sister’s home and a friend’s the rest of my senior year! i never returned home! Anyway, I’ve had a painful, ‘trick’ knee, ever since, that has given out from under me, and I’ve had some falls! So, my brother was about 10 years old at the time, when my Dad injured me. When I told him that my sore knee was contributing to some of my recent falls, he inserted ‘Oh, Perry, ( my youngest brother - 7 years old at the time), and I, sat upstairs, laughing at Dad beating you up, and you crying out in pain!! “ What a terrible thing that was, to say to me, his oldest brother! I truly need all the support I can get. Non-supportive family members, who act nonchalantly narcissistic ( sister ), or criticize ( brother ), like this, make it much harder for me to have the strength and fortitude to persevere in the aggressive manner, that I am doing right now. to improve my physical health, and overall well being! Like my wife says, I need to stick with a positive environment, not a negative one! Being with, and/or communicating with people, who lift me up, rather than keeping relationships with people who are negative toward me, bringing me down, is definitely the way to go! My wife likes your comment, and, of course, so do I, when you stated “let them drag each other down!” I keep telling myself that, and let them deal with their negativity, but it’s time for me to exit the scene, and keep only positive relationships! You have been such a great help for me, concerning my problems, with my siblings! You reached out to help me, when I needed help the most! I’m eternally grateful to you, for your wise counsel, as a friend, with this wonderful Mayo Connect forum! YOU ARE A BLESSING, and I deeply appreciate you taking your valuable time to help me!!
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4 ReactionsLong time, no see...
- GinnySnow
I recommend trying some CBD oil - go slowly at first to see how you tolerate it, Doses of 5mg at a time, several times a day, then up to 10 20 or even 30mg - caution can affect ability to operate machinery, careful with driving until you know how you're reacting.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 Reaction@abosier65 That time has long past unfortunately. Psychiatrists used to do both and actually spend time getting to know you.
Now you see someone that prescribes medication or someone that keeps you coming back like a chiropractor.
I wish you luck.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 Reaction