How do I add aging issues to a life I have never been happy in?

Reading this makes me feel sad. I feel sad because I too have never been happy in my life. My entire life has been a struggle trying to find my happiness. Unfortunately the struggle led me to unhealthy choices. Fast forward to now. I hate what I see in the mirror. The attractiveness I had when I was younger, is no longer there. I am divorced and single. As much as I want companionship, who'd choose me? I've also had a double mastectomy because of having breast cancer and high risk for it to come back. What man would want a boobless old lady? Every day I try to focus on my spiritual connection with my life. I live each day focusing on my inner beauty (my heart), and ways I can help others. My outer beauty is not as good as it used to be but my inner beauty will never change.

You earned every wrinkle and grey hair! Be proud of yourself for everything you have gone through in life! The older we get, the wiser we become!

@dmbwa99362
I do not know how this "reply" works, if I did, and it was private, I would tell you how closely I relate. I do want to thank you for replying and say that I just do not understand the replies I get about having faith in God. How can I believe in a thing that gives so much to some and so little to others? The standard answer is just have faith. I do not believe blindly. But I am trying to work on myself. I hope you find some peace.

@edsutton
Thank you for this.

@grasping i have my higher spiritual power. Some people call their higher power God. My belief is more of a spiritual belief or connection. It's what I try to focus on during my unhappy moments. It's not easy to do. Do you have a family? I have adult children and several grandchildren. When I want to stop trying, I think of them, especially my grandchildren. I want to be a part of their memories. I'm here if you want to talk more.
Take care

@edsutton I love this, thank you!

@grasping if you click on my highlighted name (try it from this message!), you can private message me. I had to learn that myself!

@grasping It hurt my heart to read your post and how hard you’ve worked at doing what you can over many years to accept and love your appearance. I applaud you for all the steps you’ve taken, even if they haven’t worked out how you hoped they would. It beats being miserable but not doing anything. (So from someone who has had a number of implants in my upper jaw since my 40’s, enjoy your new teeth just for them and how they work!)

I hope aging actually surprises you, as it has me. Aging (and cancer) have lifted the pressures I used to put on myself to constantly achieve, and has helped bring me peace.

I now focus on just living my life to the fullest I can, doing what I can do in this body of mine that has done so well to fight off cancer. Whether that’s walking in nature with my dogs. Gardening. Reading. Volunteering. Swimming. Being around my different groups of people when I want to be.

I truly hope you can actually find peace as you age and find that age helps you focus on what you love being able to do instead of how you think you appear to others ❤️‍🩹

@frouke
I am now 84 and my wife died ,pre than ten years ago of ALS. I miss her for many reasons, One of them is having someone to sleep with (besides the dog). She taught me about the pleasures of snuggling which involves a lot of hugging and occasional kissing (germ sharing). My current best friend doesn't want to snuggle or so she says. I have known her and worked with her for more than 40 years. Old women need to able to tell their own life story as well as listening to ours--old men.

@rollingf
Sorry ",pre" should be "more"

To all of you who suffer from a poor self image: Go look in a mirror. Smile at that person and note that they smile back! Is that person in the mirror really you? Or is it someone else? Stop feeling bad about yourself and start feeling good. When you come to like yourself, you will find that you like others as well and they will like you back. Although Star Wars had the dark side nailed down: Fear leads to anger which leads to hate which leads to power; they messed up the light side: Friendship leads to liking which leads to Love which leads to Peace and Harmony! Also, Master and student on the two sides lead to different conclusions: Dark side--Student has to become more powerful than the Master and kill the master, Light side--Student learns from all masters and becomes close friends with them to become one with them. The choice is yours. Become spiteful and full of hate toward others or you can be full of love and find peace. The choice is yours to make for yourself. Every one of us has to make that choice and with power and some help you can change back to the Light Side of the Force.