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The Caregivers' Guilt Dumpster - Open for business

Caregivers | Last Active: Apr 19 10:46pm | Replies (253)

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Scott and fellow caregivers…I’m right here with you all. When you said “I Do” I’m sure caregivers wasn’t on any of our minds. But I wouldn’t want anyone else taking care of him. Nobody else knows him like I do. I never imagined that I may have to live out my days without him but it seems as it may become reality. But I’m a fighter…Have been all my life. I’ve survived things that people would not believe so I had no choice but to push through and survive. As a child I had no purpose, no one that cared if I was alive or dead. I think I pushed through in search of a reason I was alive. Nowadays I say “I love you” to people that I care about because I was never told that as a child. It’s so important and people don’t realize that when they are raising kids. Anyways I won’t go off on that. When I met my husband I had been divorced twice and raised 2 kids on my own. I feel in love with him feeling as though I deserved to be truly loved for just who I was. He was raised in such a traditional, healthy family that it became so intriguing to me. It had to be a such a wonderful life. I have worked hard to keep that feeling of love in our home. My point of all of this is that I will not let the last leg of his life be anything but the best it can possibly be. He will have all of my love because he deserves it. He has never known anything other than what it is to be loved and respected. He has saved me in so many ways over the years and I will not let him down or be a disappointment. As hard as it may get I will be the strongest wife I can be and I say that with positivity. Love is tougher than anything else.

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Replies to "Scott and fellow caregivers…I’m right here with you all. When you said “I Do” I’m sure..."

@cancersucks1953

The sentiments you expressed mirror what I feel for my husband. I agree: Love is stronger than anything else; but I would add that "God is love." No matter how much my spouse saps my energy, I remind myself that he has no control over what he does or does not do or say--and he is and will be until the end (of his physical being) and beyond, a child of God. It's hard to keep this in mind, but all of you at Mayo Clinic Connect inspire me to be what;s left of my "higher self."

@cancersucks1953 I have the exact same feelings for my wife. The only thing that scares me is if something happens to me, no one else can take care of her like I do. All of our end of life planning is complete, so no worries there. I just don't want to see her by herself.

@cancersucks1953

No matter how noble our intentions and how much we strive to be the best caregiver we can be, at times it gets extremely difficult to rise to the occasion. So, thank you again for your post, which continues to inspire and strengthen me: "I will not let the last leg of his life be anything but the best it can possibly be. He will have all of my love because he deserves it.... I will not let him down or be a disappointment. As hard as it may get I will be the strongest wife I can be and I say that with positivity."