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karen8 avatar

I am a very sad caregiver

Caregivers | Last Active: Nov 20 6:48pm | Replies (72)

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Karen and all of you. I can't imagine your courage and care! Our time is coming as we are aging and I hope we will be as strong and brave as you all are. Meanwhile, you may have advice for me . I am spending time with a friend's wife, whom I have only recently met, while my husband gives hers some time and a break. She has advanced Parkinson's and while I am fond of this brilliant person, I can't understand her speech or what she would enjoy and family can't seem to advise. Putting my situation in your story, do you have friends who would spend a little time with your loved one with a little coaching from you? And if you have advice for me about how to interact with my friend when I struggle to understand her, I would be grateful.

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Replies to "Karen and all of you. I can't imagine your courage and care! Our time is coming..."

Communication can take many forms.
Body language, like a smile or a hug, might work. Or singing a familiar song. Moving to music, even if only with hands or arms, or foot tapping. Eating or drinking something together is another way to show
solidarity.
It's being together, in whatever form, that makes it meaningful and comforting and uplifting. You and she will be in my thoughts.

@hudsonlady
Cudos to you for your dedication to spending time with someone who is probably craving interaction! I am caretaker for my 94year old father in my home. Although he does not have a challenge like Parkinson’s, he does have significant hearing loss and sometimes struggles even with hearing aids. I know that with Parkinson’s it is probably more of an issue of that person having barriers to articulation. But both situations have barriers to connection and communication.

I have found that it is easier to communicate with my dad in quiet environments with fewer distracting noises. Patience and facial expressions welcoming connection and reflecting patience is important. Activities that foster connection but don’t require verbal exchange are sometimes a relief—like going for a walk (he has poor mobility so I push him in his wheelchair, or he used to drive his mobility scooter—which is more challenging and not something we do now as his eyesight with macular is becoming more diminished). He likes to garden so we visit different area nurseries and choose plants and flowers that he can enjoy. I realize that with a person suffering with Parkinson’s, needs and activities may be different.

I did google how to foster communication with someone who has Parkinson’s and it came up with the following:
Effective Communication Techniques
To facilitate better communication, consider the following strategies:
Face the Person: Ensure you are facing the individual to help them see your facial expressions and lip movements.
Choose a Quiet Environment: Minimize background noise by turning off TVs or radios to help them focus on the conversation.
Be Patient: Allow extra time for them to respond. Avoid interrupting or finishing their sentences.
Use Simple Questions: Ask yes or no questions to make it easier for them to respond.
Encourage Nonverbal Communication: Gestures, facial expressions, and writing can help convey messages when verbal communication is challenging.

Agingcare.com also has input on the subject from many people who have loved ones living with Parkinson’s. Is very interesting and I think some of the suggestions will help me with Dad!

Blessings as you continue to reach out!