Vascular Dementia: How do you cope?

There's no way to make any of this easy. Everything you're feeling is what all of us here struggle with as well. I spent at least three years feeling angry, sad, helpless, hopeless, and generally as if my life was over. Goodbye good times, hello ... what? Gradually the anger has abated. I still feel frustrations and annoyances, but the deep anger is gone. Then I struggled with depression and feeling overwhelmed with no idea about what to do. As my husband declines, I find myself taking over more and more of the things it takes to run a household and being more assertive about getting my own needs met. I've started walking lots more, lost 45 lbs., have gotten more-or-less on top of practical things, like finances, etc. My backyard is so neglected it looks like a wilderness, but you can't see it from the street and it's been so hot that I just let it go. I'll deal with that sometime. I guess. My point is, I feel more agency now, more in control of my own life. I'm 79 and determined to make my final years as rich and fulfilling as I can make them. I have an aortic aneurysm and that sort of gives me a certain perspective on what's important. Take care of my husband; take care of myself. I hope you can do the same. Courage and patience required.

You cry alot, especially at night when all the efforts of the day have settled. You read alot to try and know better the best way to make it all better. I finally spoke to my female GP and she gave me a mild med for anxiety, it was too strong and I cut it into quarters but that little piece of pill help me to stop crying, sleep better and be able to cope.
My life revolves around planning, doing things for my beloved husband and trying to pack all the joy and entertaining things we loved into the days we have left. There will be good days and bad days and you must sort out what causes each so as to repeat or avoid.
My husband has suddenly started to get worse and I can see the fear in his eyes when he says he doesn’t know what to do next. I am terrified of each new sign and try desperately to learn what is causing it, silently praying that this is not just the next step down.
Seek friends for yourself!!! If you have children lean on them and ask for help although two of our adult children are missing in action and just don’t help at all and the youngest one who is here still has no idea of the delth of anquish this path causes in so many ways. Old friends are the dearest life saver!
Although you don’t need anything else to do, if you don’t have one, consider getting a pet that your husband and yourself could love and enjoy as ours are a great comfort. And even a beta gish is calming to watch. God bless you and I will pray for you to find your way through this fog🙏