I am living with the same issues. I also have sought therapy. My spouse has CKD and heart issues. I belong to three book clubs 2 at the local library and one with a neighbor. They help me think about other things than the frustrations at home. It is adult company and a short time to give me a break.
He naps every day. During that time I read or sit outside in nature. I can honestly say my housekeeping is not good BUT I have learned that sometimes I need to put myself first.