My Anger is overwhelming

Thank you

Thank you for the warm support.

I feel that way to sometimes then I'll be out in the public and see someone a lot worse than I am and it puts me in check and say to myself What the Hell are u doing Just my 2 cents Be well

Hi @denisestlouie,

When you said, "Maybe I don't like being me," it resonated deeply with me. That was exactly how I felt when I received my diagnosis a year ago. Now, a year has passed, and while I’m in a different place, I’m still learning why I didn’t like myself. It wasn’t just about my breast cancer—it was something deeper.

Old wounds from the past surfaced, revealing that I had buried emotions and pain for years. I had suppressed the grief of my father’s Alzheimer's and the hurt of being bullied at school. It all came rushing back because of the journey I embarked on after my diagnosis.

I hope you can look deep within your heart to understand where your anger comes from and begin working through it. Only we can uncover our own wounds, and only you can take that first step toward healing.

@angiemal I’m a cup half full type of person. I like to find silver linings. Getting stage 4 incurable stage 4 cancer really shook me.

I didnt go into anger on diagnosis. I haven’t felt anger. . I don’t know why but maybe because of my past job training over the years. Clamping down on emotions to keep a cool head. That training helped.

Yet dealing with cancer has brought many many blessings into my life. Getting to dig deep into myself in ways I’ve never had to do before has been one, and so incredibly empowering. I’m so much stronger as a result.

I’ve also been more ruthless (?) about what serves me, and what doesn’t. I’ve always placed other people’s needs above my own. A people pleaser. I may have limited time (who knows) and I want to spend that time in a way that makes me feel good. I have managed to break free from worrying about what others may think of me. Huge pressure off!

Thank you for sharing 🌺

I feel you. I have had anger associated with my prostate cancer diagnosis (metastatic but currently in remission) and its effect on my overall health and sex life.

I have been in therapy for more than 2 years. My therapist tells me anger isn't a "primary " emotion but is a manifestation of fear, hurt or both. As I have progressed through my therapy and treatments, I believe she is right. After my diagnosis in 2021 I was angry, fearful and shocked. My future plans were upended. My marriage was affected. My previous wonderful sex life was shattered (prostate removed-no ejaculation, no erections, genital shrinkage from the Lupron treatment, loss of Libido from Lupron/no testosterone). So, I understand your anger and relate to it.

But as I continued in therapy I started navigating the 5 stages of grief. I have finally come to some sort of acceptance. My life has changed and will never be as it was. But I can move forward and enjoy many things life has to offer. I had to work through the fear and hurt; it wasn't easy.

I have no answers for you. I hope you find a therapist that works for you and you come to some acceptance and can leave some of the anger behind.

Best wishes to you.

Thank you for sharing that with me. I doing my Best to calm my brain and not be in a panic.

Denise

Hang in there! Of course you’re angry..you got dealt a band hand. All of us in this forum have. But you are not alone but we all face choices. I’m no “daisy smelling happy face” but I CHOOSE to face my diagnosis with a positive attitude—most of the time. Get angry if you wish— it’s OK! Vent as you wish. But don’t let it affect you relationships. Stiff upper lip! Good luck!

I’m really happy that I just read all the comments here, it felt like you were all talking about me…the anger, hating myself and feeling like a stranger in my own skin. I had my first cancer diagnosis in 2020 and I slipped into a void mentally, I couldn’t focus on anything and I felt lost, I went through the process of tests and then surgery all the while I was trying to keep up with the latest news about covid, it was an emotional tornado. I later felt my emotions were returning but all I felt was intense anger and anxiety, to make it worse I started having nightmares about my past abuse at the hands of an older brother, I had a total meltdown. I went for therapy and gradually started feeling more in control of myself, it’s a slow process but gradually I got better. I couldn’t resolve the issues that I had with family so I stopped trying and focused on myself, it was the best decision I’ve made in many years, yes it was painful but the emotional abuse was far worse.

Sorry about your situation. I've had 2 different types of breast cancer. I'm a 21 and 15 year survivor since BC first showed up. Now my husband is diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma... I've felt sad, angry, depressed, hopeful, fear and a need to seek justice and revenge. Try to be creative-art, writing, etc. Think of your anger as energy and be productive with it. I'm writing a memoire. Try finding peace by enjoying nature. Good luck.