1. < Depression & Anxiety

Inconsiderate, intimidating neighbors cause depression and anxiety?

Posted by robertwills @robertwills, Oct 26, 2024

Lets; say you have neighbors that sit outside your apartment building, smoke "weed" in public view (which is illegal) and use intimidating gestures towards you as you come and go. Could this be enough to cause legitimate depression and anxiety?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

frouke | @frouke | 5 days ago
In reply to @robertwills "Update: I am pleased to announce good news! There was a moving truck at the building..." + (show)
@robertwills

Update: I am pleased to announce good news! There was a moving truck at the building today and it might have been for the men. No confirmation on this yet but it appears so! I should know for sure by tomorrow or Tuesday. I will update soon!

Jump to this post

Try to keep out of sight if it’s the troublesome people, they will likely be hostile and you don’t want to be there for the fallout, after they’ve gone celebrate your victory and get back to living your life on your terms, good luck.

REPLY
mrmacabre | @mrmacabre | 4 days ago
In reply to @amberpep "Totally agree with post about problem renters ...... I moved here, into what is supposed to..." + (show)
@amberpep

Totally agree with post about problem renters ......
I moved here, into what is supposed to be a Senior Living Apartment. Ever since I moved here it has steadily gone down hill .... no maintenance, drugs, people who be in either Assisted Living or even Nursing Homes. We have people who do drugs - one group cooks meth. in their apartment and there is a lot of marijuana smoked. There are 2 people who intentionally urinate and poop on the rugs inside their apartments, and also on the rocking chairs outside. I do not understand why these people cannot be given notice to be evicted, but the Manager says, "it's a long process." They first give a 3 months notice, if no action taken, they try again, then they have to take the person(s) to court, and only then can they give them a 3 week notice til they are out. Meanwhile, here we are ... all the rest of us. One of these individuals actually told the Mgr. "if you clean up my apartment before I leave, I'll just do it again." So, they know what they are doing. The woman above me is constantly moving furniture around, by the door at night so "no one can get in" .... she hollers every time she goes into the bathroom, especially at night, and is known to "not be well" mentally. Once again, she has a case worker who fights for her to stay here .... what about me? and the rest of us?
I have been looking for another place to move, but I can't afford any of the other senior facilities .... the prices are terrible. Oh how I wish I'd have never moved to this awful place, city, and state. And these are supposed to be "the golden years." Yea .... if you're rich. Barb

Jump to this post

Your current situation is exactly what I'm dreading might be our future housing situation. When I had to retire almost 10 years ago and go on permanent disability, we were forced to sell our home, or lose it. We lived with our son and his family for almost 2 years before we could afford to rent a place of our own.
We rented a duplex in Anacortes, WA. for almost 6 years before we moved to our current residence. It belongs to our son-in-law's aunt. It's in a 55+ community with a great HOA, and we love it here. We've been here for almost 2 years now, and we just signed an additional 2 year long lease extension, for more money of course.
But when the owner decides she wants her house back(She's living and working in Israel) we have no idea where we'll end up. We don't have any money for first/last months rent, and we barely get by on a month to month basis. We'll probably end up in some crappy senior complex and be subjected to the things that you've described in your current residence.
I'm sorry to hear that you're basically stuck where you are even though you don't want to stay there. It's not fair to those of us who just want to live out their last few years in peace and quiet.
Hang in there.

REPLY
robertwills | @robertwills | 4 days ago

frouke: I was out and read your posting. I then looked out the window, saw the sun was setting and hustled like a crazy person out of there to get back by sundown! Thank you!

This time still may be the "danger zone" but it strongly appears now that the men are in fact gone! It could be that they are gone but they will come back for their belongings or come back for something else!

Regardless, I was on "cloud nine" this afternoon. It literally feels like what I imagine a heaven feels like! I will update soon. Thank you again.

REPLY
1 reply
robertwills | @robertwills | 4 days ago
In reply to @robertwills "frouke: I was out and read your posting. I then looked out the window, saw the..." + (show)
@robertwills

frouke: I was out and read your posting. I then looked out the window, saw the sun was setting and hustled like a crazy person out of there to get back by sundown! Thank you!

This time still may be the "danger zone" but it strongly appears now that the men are in fact gone! It could be that they are gone but they will come back for their belongings or come back for something else!

Regardless, I was on "cloud nine" this afternoon. It literally feels like what I imagine a heaven feels like! I will update soon. Thank you again.

Jump to this post

Update: Not the good news I hoped would be sustained from my previous update. I think there may still be some men in the building. I'm not sure about this but there is a possible indication that they are still here. I will update again as soon as I know.

REPLY
1 reply
pml | @pml | 4 days ago
In reply to @robertwills "Update: Not the good news I hoped would be sustained from my previous update. I think..." + (show)
@robertwills

Update: Not the good news I hoped would be sustained from my previous update. I think there may still be some men in the building. I'm not sure about this but there is a possible indication that they are still here. I will update again as soon as I know.

Jump to this post

Robert,
I'm sorry to hear this. I was hoping like you that they were, in fact, gone! Frouke was right! Keep out of their way when they do move! Regardless, we'll just keep praying and expecting a miracle! God does things in his own time. Our prayers will be answered and those awful people will be out of your life!
PML

REPLY
kb2014 | @kb2014 | 4 days ago

Let us know if these people are gone.

REPLY
kb2014 | @kb2014 | 4 days ago
In reply to @amberpep "Totally agree with post about problem renters ...... I moved here, into what is supposed to..." + (show)
@amberpep

Totally agree with post about problem renters ......
I moved here, into what is supposed to be a Senior Living Apartment. Ever since I moved here it has steadily gone down hill .... no maintenance, drugs, people who be in either Assisted Living or even Nursing Homes. We have people who do drugs - one group cooks meth. in their apartment and there is a lot of marijuana smoked. There are 2 people who intentionally urinate and poop on the rugs inside their apartments, and also on the rocking chairs outside. I do not understand why these people cannot be given notice to be evicted, but the Manager says, "it's a long process." They first give a 3 months notice, if no action taken, they try again, then they have to take the person(s) to court, and only then can they give them a 3 week notice til they are out. Meanwhile, here we are ... all the rest of us. One of these individuals actually told the Mgr. "if you clean up my apartment before I leave, I'll just do it again." So, they know what they are doing. The woman above me is constantly moving furniture around, by the door at night so "no one can get in" .... she hollers every time she goes into the bathroom, especially at night, and is known to "not be well" mentally. Once again, she has a case worker who fights for her to stay here .... what about me? and the rest of us?
I have been looking for another place to move, but I can't afford any of the other senior facilities .... the prices are terrible. Oh how I wish I'd have never moved to this awful place, city, and state. And these are supposed to be "the golden years." Yea .... if you're rich. Barb

Jump to this post

Can anyone expound on these posts? I don't mean to sound ignorant but my husband and I own an rv- very nice' and love in a rural area in a small private owner rv park where our space rental includes everything. We have been insulated from all this since my husband retired in 2023 left Albuquerque NM bought the rv then lived in small rural communities. Can anyone say if this is a nationwide issue or just certain states? My husband has returned to work part time. We have discussed moving. I am shocked this type of behavior reached senior housing. Thank you

REPLY
1 reply
Mentor
Laurie, Volunteer Mentor | @roch | 4 days ago
In reply to @amberpep "Totally agree with post about problem renters ...... I moved here, into what is supposed to..." + (show)
@amberpep

Totally agree with post about problem renters ......
I moved here, into what is supposed to be a Senior Living Apartment. Ever since I moved here it has steadily gone down hill .... no maintenance, drugs, people who be in either Assisted Living or even Nursing Homes. We have people who do drugs - one group cooks meth. in their apartment and there is a lot of marijuana smoked. There are 2 people who intentionally urinate and poop on the rugs inside their apartments, and also on the rocking chairs outside. I do not understand why these people cannot be given notice to be evicted, but the Manager says, "it's a long process." They first give a 3 months notice, if no action taken, they try again, then they have to take the person(s) to court, and only then can they give them a 3 week notice til they are out. Meanwhile, here we are ... all the rest of us. One of these individuals actually told the Mgr. "if you clean up my apartment before I leave, I'll just do it again." So, they know what they are doing. The woman above me is constantly moving furniture around, by the door at night so "no one can get in" .... she hollers every time she goes into the bathroom, especially at night, and is known to "not be well" mentally. Once again, she has a case worker who fights for her to stay here .... what about me? and the rest of us?
I have been looking for another place to move, but I can't afford any of the other senior facilities .... the prices are terrible. Oh how I wish I'd have never moved to this awful place, city, and state. And these are supposed to be "the golden years." Yea .... if you're rich. Barb

Jump to this post

@amberpep,
So sorry you're going through this, everyone deserves safe place to live.
Not sure of your state, but many states / counties have information on tenants' rights. As an example, this is from MN Attorney General website on Landlord / Tenants Rights and Responsibilities. https://www.ag.state.mn.us/consumer/handbooks/lt/default.asp

Even if not in MN, it has many helpful suggestions for before, during and leaving a rental.

As you mentioned, even if your landlord wanted to get rid of bad renters, the process to evict someone who does not want to leave can be a long and costly processes. If renter is paying rent, then landlord has to prove they are a violating lease or safety risk. Sounds like some of your neighbors are, but in court the landlord must provide proof, police records, etc...

Keep looking for other places, though it can be tough due to costs. The good ones usually have waiting lists.

REPLY
1 reply
frouke | @frouke | 4 days ago
In reply to @roch "@amberpep, So sorry you're going through this, everyone deserves safe place to live. Not sure of..." + (show)
@roch

@amberpep,
So sorry you're going through this, everyone deserves safe place to live.
Not sure of your state, but many states / counties have information on tenants' rights. As an example, this is from MN Attorney General website on Landlord / Tenants Rights and Responsibilities. https://www.ag.state.mn.us/consumer/handbooks/lt/default.asp

Even if not in MN, it has many helpful suggestions for before, during and leaving a rental.

As you mentioned, even if your landlord wanted to get rid of bad renters, the process to evict someone who does not want to leave can be a long and costly processes. If renter is paying rent, then landlord has to prove they are a violating lease or safety risk. Sounds like some of your neighbors are, but in court the landlord must provide proof, police records, etc...

Keep looking for other places, though it can be tough due to costs. The good ones usually have waiting lists.

Jump to this post

I’m a longtime renter and I take pride in myself and where I live, I have been in my building for over 30 years and in the last 10 years or so I have seen a big decline in the property, both people and management are responsible for this. It only takes one or two uncaring tenants to make a big difference in how the property looks. I’m a senior and I have looked into senior housing but they are not very appealing, very poorly maintained, if you’re blessed with money in your older age you can afford to rent or buy a beautiful unit complete with all the amenities you need. It always comes down to the cost and sadly many people just don’t care where they live and how clean it is so they ruin it for the rest of us, the biggest insult is the rent is very high so that’s even worse adding insult to injury.

REPLY
1 reply
pml | @pml | 3 days ago
In reply to @frouke "I’m a longtime renter and I take pride in myself and where I live, I have..." + (show)
@frouke

I’m a longtime renter and I take pride in myself and where I live, I have been in my building for over 30 years and in the last 10 years or so I have seen a big decline in the property, both people and management are responsible for this. It only takes one or two uncaring tenants to make a big difference in how the property looks. I’m a senior and I have looked into senior housing but they are not very appealing, very poorly maintained, if you’re blessed with money in your older age you can afford to rent or buy a beautiful unit complete with all the amenities you need. It always comes down to the cost and sadly many people just don’t care where they live and how clean it is so they ruin it for the rest of us, the biggest insult is the rent is very high so that’s even worse adding insult to injury.

Jump to this post

Hi Frouke,
I'm in a similar situation that you are. I've lived in a mobile home park for 30 years and like you said, in the last 10 years or so, it has declined a lot. It was a nice 55 plus mobile home park when my husband and I first moved in here. Everyone kept up their yards and flower gardens. It looked so nice! Now there is a new owner and it's no longer a 55 plus park. Younger people live here now and don't care what things look like. Since my husband died in July, I can't afford to move so I'm just keeping my place as neat as I can and ignoring the rest of the mess. Also the space rent increased! It's now $1100 per month just for the land that my mobile home is on! I own the mobile home. That amount is considered reasonable considering that most rents around here in Edmonds, Washington which is 15 miles north of Seattle start at $2500 and go up! At least Edmonds is a safe area. Seattle's terrible crime and murder rate hasn't gotten here yet. Also the police here arrest the bad guys. They don't in Seattle any longer. It's awful what seniors have to face in today's world just to survive! If you aren't rich, and I'm not, you have a real problem. I'm praying constantly about my situation and I'll pray about yours also. God is there for us and always has been.
PML

REPLY
1 reply
View MoreView Less
Please sign in or register to post a reply.