I am so sorry for what you are going through. I too ended up at the hospital very very sick. I went for a regular check up and my doctor basically wouldn't let me leave. The journey through transplant can be daunting at times but a good support system and a good team of doctors will get you there if your doctors feel that you are a candidate for a transplant I would encourage by all means to start that Journey with them. You will be amazed at how different you will feel once you heal and things start turning around. My doctors come in all the time I was a mess I was just bright yellow with jaundice I had muscle atrophy I was bloated and I had no energy or strength I'm a totally different person today and there's many many years potentially of living after transplantation people live years. Your doctors would not put you through a transplant if they didn't think it was worth it for you so I would encourage you to listen to your doctors find a good transplant team. I went to mayo in Rochester. What they can do today with medicine and transplantation is a miracle and I hope you can find a way to just trust the process and I think you'll find that you're worth giving yourself more years. good luck to you