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Dementia Anger Issues - bathing
My mom is in a memory care unit. They insist on giving her a bath/shower. It takes 3-4 people to get her to do so and she is very angry after it's all over. I understand that they have rules to follow....but when her anger leads to hitting other patients and they then pushing my mother and causing her to fall, I cannot see their reasoning for giving her the shower/bath in the first place. The family has asked for them to just do sponge baths but they don't seem to listen. What do we do?
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Most of the staff are LPN's. Are there CPA's? Some are lower on the totem pole than others and so they are having to do the menial jobs. The staff do not know each other and have to ask if they are an LPN or not. Even some of the patient's fight over their caretakers for the day. However, there is one lady that helps mom a lot and talks to her and puts her arm on her shoulder. She spends extra time with her whether it be just a few more seconds or not. She will definitely get a hug the next time I'm there.
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2 ReactionsJust keep on the staff members to what you want as many times as you are there. Not an excuse but they have others to take care of that's why you just keep on them
If you hired these caretakers from an agency contact that agency director and make your demands clear and too the point. These care givers seems unconcerned and disinterested and you need to be strict with your directions to them. But get on the agency and either get the caregivers out or straighten-up. Your mom is the client and needs to be taken care of appropriately.
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1 ReactionMy mom is in a Memory Care unit. I have no control over the staff.
You actually do have control over the staff. Not in staffing persay but on how they treat your mother. All health care facilities have oversight on patient care and if you feel your mother is being mistreated than you can contact the head of the care facility and voice your concerns. You should never feel that you have no control where your mother resides you do.
The staff know me very well in the unit!!
You have to be proactive. I agree with safety shield you have control on how the staff treat your Mom. You may need to keep going up the administration and even to State or Provincial authorities who license these homes. No LTC wants State or Provincial authorities involved! Let the staff know you will be checking on Mom's care every time you visit.
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2 ReactionsI worked for over 40 years as a physical therapist, mostly with geriatrics in nursing homes and patients' homes. Seeing the fear and confusion in the few dementia patients I had was heart breaking. I think your mom's memory care facility is much too rigid about bathing, especially where feeling loved and understood is so important in those last scary years. Bedfast patients can be kept very clean with bed baths. I feel squeaky clean when I can only take sponge baths when we're camping. I've read several books about Alzheimer's that say even tho our loved ones took showers daily, we have to lighten up and maybe try to give them a bath or shower once a week-if necessary-kinda like the old Saturday night baths.
I talked to the director of a VA Home we are considering for my husband and maybe me someday if it becomes necessary. She said they had a colonel who refused to take showers. They finally told him the general was coming and he'd better get ready, and he did:) The home your mom is in seems to be going by out-dated standards. I'm really wondering how much training the administration and staff have had on the care and needs of dementia patients. Places like that are why I am so dreading having to find a good home for my husband. I worked in one that had a centurion club whose members didn't have to get up as early as the rest for breakfast when they were 100 years old or older.
My husband used to take showers daily and is now reluctant to take showers once a week unless I remind him that we're going out with friends, to church, etc. He has gotten so that he doesn't like to be chilly so I work hard to make sure that the water temp just right, etc. Once he's in there he loves it and isn't anxious to get out. We have ADA height safety rails around the tub and a good non-slip mat on the floor. However, I'm thinking about converting our tub to a walk in shower which will be a lot easier for us both, especially if we need to use a tub chair, hand held shower hose, etc. someday.
Bless you. Your mom is fortunate to have you as her advocate when she needs to dependson others so much for EVERYTHING.
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6 ReactionsYou might have to speak to an ombudsman from your county if you are seriously concerned about the rough handling of your mom and their seeming lack of compassion and caring. Yes, their jobs and demanding and they are often understaffed and underpaid. Not many people have the energy and patience for this stressful population. Our patience runs out sometimes too. I always hated it when they rotated the staff after they got to know their patients' needs and quirks. Changing routines and rooms can be very unsettling and frightening for the residents.
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4 ReactionsMaybe tell them if your mother gets hurt, they will pay for her expenses and you have a good lawyer!