How do people handle the losses in aging?

Scott -- Watched your vid. Thanks for sharing it.

You demo a fab attitude and a caring personality... you stepped up and took the time to try to help others who may also be dealing with life and the challenges it presents to all of us.

All the best in your continued recovery!

/LarryG

All of these comments help me to know my feelings aren't unique. Thank you to each of you who've shared. We lost a son-in-law 4 months ago and only last week an adult grandson died quite suddenly. Both losses were devastating and left me thinking that too often life simply isn't fair. I've always felt that those with strong religious beliefs are able to find comfort more easily than those of us who don't find answers in religion.

Thank you, Larry!

You made my day.

Definitely some tough stuff.

You probably know this already, but be sure to give yourself time to grieve.

These kinds of shocks can have profound impacts, mentally, physically, and spiritually.

You may be doing the same to a ton of strangers, Scott... who, for a variety of reasons, may not be able to tell you that you gave them the hope, confidence, will, etc -- to carry on and achieve a more "livable" life.

Thank you... for spreading your message!

/LarryG

@jilliana First off, welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect! I see you have been a member for quite a while before making your first post.

As you can see, we all seem to have different ways to cope with losses. Read through what choices are there, and pick one. That doesn't mean you can't try to change to another. I look forward to reading what you decide!
Ginger

You know, I figured I could either light a candle, or curse the darkness.

There's more than enough cursing going around these days, so...

When a loss is very traumatic we can feel we're "walking dead."
At such times, we can try to keep walking out of habit, i.e. doing what must be done as best we can.
We should not expect or demand more of ourselves at a time when just taking the next step is so close to our limits.
We need to trust that our grief knows what to do and is doing it.
Therapy and support groups may help. I joined a support group after my father's suicide, and it helped me feel I wasn't alone.
After 2 or 3 months, an odd thing happened. I was talking with someone and gradually realized that I was actually interested in what we were talking about! It was a feeling of being alive! What a blessing, to realize I was capable of interest in an obscure detail of musical instrument design!
I realized that at that moment I was emerging from my grief and re-engaging with the life around me.
This was not something I could force or will (I could will some actions, but not feelings.)
It was a healing that had to happen in its own time and way, just like healing from any injury.
Peace to You, Jillianna. Just little steps.

Amazing video. Thank you so much for sharing. And thank you so much for your kind advice. I have also found through out my life that I am most happy and at peace when I am of service to others. I have been the caretaker in the family. I am now the official caretaker of all the neighborhood birds lol not sure how much my neighbors like the crazy bird lady😁

Thank you again Scott. Wishing you a long and healthy life

Thank you, and the same to you!

Due to my restricted mobility, I can't physically reach out to others.

But I'd like to think that my YouTube channel is an alternative.
https://www.youtube.com/@srlucado/videos
For one thing, it gives me a wider potential audience. And it demonstrates that with some creativity, physical *limitations* are not *restrictions*.

Say hi the birdies for me, I enjoy seeing my backyard critters come and go.