How do you cope with the fact that you had a stroke?

I had a stroke in early 2023 and missed Christmas completely. This happened at our vacation to go skiing with my sons and grandsons when I had a stroke where I was completely out of it My only memory was I was sitting outside in the snow in the middle of the night at a place we were staying in my pajamas and freezing to death just hoping some one would drive by and help me. I didn't know where our room was.

Back inside the room my husband woke up and realized I was gone. My older son with two little boys were sleeping in the living room fold out and when my husband came out into the room and said where is Mom? My oldest son said, "shit, she went out the door." There I was and I don't remember their rescue but husband put me back to bed and put heating pads we always travel with.

They now knew that it's not altitude but something else. So the next morning they brought me to the hospital in Aspen and they scanned my my brain and said she needs to get to Denver for the care I would need. I have no memory of this but was taken in a helicopter from Aspen to Denver where they realized I had a stroke. I was in the ICU for four days when my husband emailed a Mayo doctor he knew who was in the area of strokes.

They sent me back to Rochester by an airplane with medical staff and I was at St Mary's for countless days and then went to rehab to learn how to walk. As you may know if you lay in bed for 108 days you are as helpless as a baby. I was in rehab for two and a half weeks before I went home. So now I could walk with a walker since I was so weak. And started my plot to get better strength in my body. One of my doctors told me that walking was the best healing of my brain.

We have a family cabin in Wisconsin that we always go to because I have three sisters and their husbands who all live around this former old resort from the 50's . And I went out every day and began my therapy starting by walking 3 miles. First with my walker. Then with just a cane. Life was coming back to me. All this family and great fresh air were the only medications I needed.

As you may feel PTSD after the thrill of being able to walk and talk. I often worry this will happen again but was told by my doctor I have a 90 percent chance of having another stroke. But still I worry on occasions. So my desire is to come and talk with other stroke patients about how I improved my health and got stronger over time. The key is to never give up. Keep trying to improve your body strength.

When I meet people now and tell them I had a stroke last year they are floored and think I wouldn't know.

Some funny things I heard I did was while I was unconscious and couldn't talk my niece came to visit me and was there helping to feed me lunch and what ever it was I opened my eyes and said, "This tastes like dog shit!!!" She said out loud, she is there!!!!

The work my husband did for me was astounding. He came every day to the hospital to be with me and made sure i was getting the stuff I needed. For instance I was impaired on my left side of my body and Steve , my husband, did leg exercises every day and for my arm. Mind you he is a consultant at Mayo and runs a lab so had work to do all the time but would bring his computer with him and try to get some of his work done. He is a scientist so not have to see patients.

All this is to say it's so important to have an advocate for the stroke patient. Usually most of us don't have that because of a number of reasons. But what I tell recovery patients is to do everything your physical therapist tells you to do. When in rehab that is the special work we need to get stronger is go to every class and session and don't skip a day.

From a stroke history I have a lot I can share patients. But I would also like to talk to the physicians who work with Stoke victims. I have some good advice. One thing my husband told me is it was time for me to move out of St Mary's because there is nothing we can do for her anymore you need to put her in a home. And these doctors said all of this right in front of me. Steve looked over to me and tears were running down my face. So don't give bad news in from of the patient. We are unable to talk but we can understand. This haunts me that maybe these doctors were right and I will never recover fully.

I want to talk with training doctors and tell them this. DON'T GIVE BAD NEWS IN FRONT OF THE PATIENT!!!