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Do you control your stuff, or does your stuff control you? If you feel like you fall more into the second category, you’re in league with millions of people who struggle to let go of accumulated belongings. For some, it’s more than an annoyance. An estimated 2% to 6% of Americans have a psychological condition called hoarding disorder. This condition is about three times more likely to occur in the retirement years than in midlife.
The risks of hoarding to health and well-being include increased risk of falls and fires, lack of hygiene, difficulty preparing food and getting good sleep, social isolation, job and financial difficulties, and housing difficulties, such as having heat or electricity cut off.
Whether you or a loved one simply has a lot of clutter or falls into the hoarding category, taking steps to reduce clutter can have important benefits.
Up front, find ways to reduce the amount of stuff you bring into the home. Ask of each potentially acquired item if you have an immediate use for it, time to deal with it appropriately, money to afford it and space to put it.
When you’re ready to clean existing clutter in a room, have supplies and a strategy before you begin, including:
- Making a spot for everything — Have four containers labeled “trash,” “recycle,” “sell or donate,” and “keep.”
- Asking hard questions of every item — Do I need it? Do I have a plan to use it? Have I used it in the last year? Do I have space to keep it? Make every item justify its continuing presence.
- Pacing yourself — Give yourself breaks. If you feel overwhelmed, stop. It’s a stressful, draining process. Rushing things or pushing through severe anxiety can be counterproductive.
- Having an exit strategy — Put garbage and recycling in bins outside the home. Take donations to a drop-off site. Immediately place ads or create online posts for things to sell or give away. Things allowed to linger in the residence are less likely to be removed.
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We are in our 70’s. I have never had a problem with decluttering, however my husband keeps everything.
Recently his law office of 40+ years is being sold. There is some very good office furniture but it’s also filled with his “junk”. I told him he cannot bring any of it home.
What is the best way for him to get rid of it all?
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1 ReactionAsk him to choose what means the most to him from your label of his junk and offer to help if he wants you to. Choose together a place at your home and label as his. I like to compromise saves a lot of hurt feelings.
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2 ReactionsThis is great
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1 ReactionI like attending estate sales because it gives perspective of all the stuff i.e. junk that people accumulate. I rarely buy anything, except a few Made in USA items that are harder and harder to find. Last purchase for $3: a never worn Land’s End turtleneck before they outsourced everything to foreign countries.
My issue is I am a minimalist, and my spouse is the type to keep everything. I used to fret about it. Now that we are active seniors, I realized if I outlive him, in a matter of weeks all his stuff can be passed on or tossed out. Easy peasy. I have no emotional attachment to any of “it”—just him.
I remember as a child when my father died. My mother kept his suits for years in the closet. Too depressing for me, but we are all wired differently.
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2 ReactionsI have too much stuff. I need to declutter but just don’t seem to get to it., I waited too long and need help with this. I may have someone who can help but lately she has not been up to coming over to do this with me. I haven’t been driving since cataract sx two years ago so this makes it more difficult as well. My husband has his own issues and goes to visit our children for several months while I prefer to stay home so I don’t rely on him to help me. Things are more difficult it seems.
Sarah -- So sorry to note one of your passing comments in the above post. After my cataract surgery, my vision was SO much better than it was prior.
Can your eyesight be improved? Hope so.
All the best!
/LarryG
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1 ReactionComforting to know others struggle as I do. Even better to hear hints on dealing with it all! When my first husband passed at 52, my daughter had read an article about getting a memory box and putting everything in of his that I couldn't part with. It has been 25 years this past week and I have never gone into that box. More like a treasure chest. Full. Unfortunately I also have boxes of Mom and Dads stuff, my mother in law, a brother who's gone now. And then there's my own....my Mom always has a great theory. Set a timer. 10 min.30 min. An hour. It really does help at an emotional level. And it's also amazing what you can go through in a short space or time. And if you can't deal, the timer will go off and free you from the task!
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3 ReactionsI've recently started thinning out stuff. I have a lot of clothes, so I started by editing one category at a time. I started with shirts, boxing up many to donate. Then I boxed a bunch of sport coats and suits, next sweaters, and next shoes - I still have to get rid of more shoes. (I have 30 some pairs.) In my study, I need more space, so I emptied the 3 drawer file and tossed a lot of outdated paperwork. Last year I started sorting through my library. It's hard to get rid of books that I've had for decades. I have a collection of hymnals (400 or so) from 1850- 1975, that I need to figure out what to do with, as well as more than 300 ties that I don't wear as much as I used to. I suppose eBay would be a place to start with antique books and collectible ties and some of my collection of antique tools. My wife has thinned out her collection of candle holders. We're also working out what our daughter and son want. Slowly, we'll make our kids' lives easier when we're gone.
Jim
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3 Reactions