1. < Just Want to Talk

Why do people wanna live so long

Posted by calilin @calilin, 2 days ago

I am 65 years old, female and suffer from numerous medical conditions. I am to the point where I just wanna stop all this. I have Psoriatic Arthritis, a small Hiatal Hernia, bi-lateral kidney stones, Scoliosis, 3 compression fractures of my spine, have to use a cane or a walker to be able to walk, I just am miserable, my left foot is numb, a long with my hands. I never thought I'd be this way at this age. My Mom lived to be 94 and my Dad 92. I can't even fathom living that long, I hope I don't have to. Doctor's just push pills at you and don't wanna do anything constructive for you so why would I want to live a long life like this ? I was a very active, young for my age person. I'm just a shell of what I used to be.

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calilin | @calilin | 1 day ago
In reply to @scottbeammeup "I'm a bit younger than you but sometimes feel the same way, but 75 seems more..." + (show)
@scottbeammeup

I'm a bit younger than you but sometimes feel the same way, but 75 seems more reasonable than 65. There is an interesting article in The Atlantic that makes this argument called "Why I Hope to Die at 75." (https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2014/10/why-i-hope-to-die-at-75/379329/).

I don't have the mobility issues you have but do have some likely permanent limitations from cancer treatment. I am cynical of doctors after my experience. Most of them follow a script for all patients regardless of individual needs. However, it is still possible to find a doctor that I call a "diamond" who treats you like a unique person vs. just another cog on the assembly line. I have one. He believes me, listens to me, and does things that are in my best interest. It makes a HUGE difference. You need to find a doctor like that who can truly help you. It may take seeing 3 or 4 doctors before you find one.

For me, for now, I want to continue living because it's spring and it's beautiful outside, I want to keep writing music even if no one will ever hear it but me, and I do volunteer work that helps others a lot. Can you do something like swimming or just being in water to help with your pain? I'm just a random guy on the internet so don't know much about you beyond what you said but I do think you can find a doctor who will help you vs. just pushing pills and sending you away.

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Thank You for taking time to reply, you sound like you have some health issues too. I don't want to leave this ol earth but I don't wanna live like this either. It's been a long hard road, this ol life of mine. I am so glad you can still find the beauty in living and writing music. I love music especially the old stuff from back in the day. I love to listen and think about what a simpler world we lived in versus the way it is now. Anyway, I could go on for days but I truly wanted to Thank You for caring and I truly hope that things work out better than you ever expected. Keep the Faith !!!! Wishing you sweet water, slow clocks and other nice things. Big Hug !!!

REPLY
mariajean03 | @mariajean03 | 2 hours ago
In reply to @calilin "Do you ever feel like God has turned his back on you, I do. I spent..." + (show)
@calilin

Do you ever feel like God has turned his back on you, I do. I spent most of my life in church and I've prayed and prayed but nothing happens. Sometimes I feel like he hates me. I've been having surgeries since I was 4 years old. I too suffer from stomach issues so I know what you must feel like, not fun at all I hope that you find something that will help you, have you tried lasers for your feet ? They can help with pain and numbness in a lot of cases. They do have a ton of meds for Colitis now too, some even put people in remission from the disease. Thank you so much for caring enough to reply, I truly appreciate it. Best wishes for a better tomorrow for us both !!!!

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I've also had OCD and depression all my life. In an emotionally abusive marriage and no one cares. They see him as my Savior. I still believe God has a plan for us. I'm sorry you're in so much pain and will ask Dr. about the laser idea. Could you seek out a therapist or pastor for emotional support? Feeling alone on an island. Keep in touch if you want.

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thisismarilynb | @thisismarilynb | 33 minutes ago

I have just finished reading all the comments and am absolutely astounded. You all seem so young to me to be so sick and suffer so much pain. I am 90 years old and nearer to 91 than 90. I am not in pain. I don't have any major (or perhaps any) illnesses. I lost my husband of 62 years almost four years ago and am still suffering deep depression from this. I do not take drugs. I am not a fanatic about this but I have had some extremely bad reactions to some drugs that a lot of people take every day. People tell me I "don't look like 90." I am wondering what a 90 year old person is supposed to look like. I still live in my own home and am quite able to take care of myself. I am also able to drive myself anywhere I need to go. This helps me to stay independent. I do not have any signs of dementia and am able to make my own decisions, be they medical or financial. I don't know why I have lived so long and am so well, except that for many years I was a racewalker. I firmly believe this has helped me. In addition, I was never a smoker and drank very little. The biggest drawback to such a long life is that everyone who has been close to you has died. It is hard when you get to a point where you have outlived everyone. But I go on and certainly have no plans to do away with myself. I have survived many things during my life and that could also be a factor. I don't know. Anyway, you all have my deep sympathy for what you are going through. Unhappily we do not have a great medical system in this country.

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