Time to give up? Mourn and accept new health reality?

Posted by keeptrying @keeptrying, Jan 31, 2018

As each day brings new limitations, I think it is irrational for me to continue to reach out to sustain the way of life I had. Is it really that bad to retreat to the world of books,gardening,music,etc instead of an outward looking way of life?

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@keeptrying Oh, I don't think it's all that bad. That is about where I am. That and reading and responding to email. Of course, if I did not have my disorders, that is about where I would be anyway at 78. But I am still looking outward. I just got off the NORD website, where I learned a lot.

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@keeptrying I'm with @oldkarl. It can be depressing to look back at what was instead of looking forward with what is. Life really is about changes and how we react to the changes. Me, I hate change. I hate that I can't walk more than a few blocks and then it's a struggle but I just try to do the best I can and work on seeing if I can go a little further each day. I think it's always a good thing to reach out and see if there are ways or treatments you can do to help with your current health problems. Each of us are unique and there just maybe that one thing out there that will help. I have resigned myself to never being able to run but then I couldn't run very fast even as a kid. Now I'm the guy you want to be with if a bear is chasing you. All you have to do is outrun me which is not too hard to do. ☺

Do you have any hobbies that you enjoy that you can do? I like taking pictures of critters out of my window in the room where I have computer. Took this one yesterday - squirrel jumped on my bird feeder and ate most of a large bird seed wheel.

Hoping you have a pain free rest of the week.

John

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@johnbishop

@keeptrying I'm with @oldkarl. It can be depressing to look back at what was instead of looking forward with what is. Life really is about changes and how we react to the changes. Me, I hate change. I hate that I can't walk more than a few blocks and then it's a struggle but I just try to do the best I can and work on seeing if I can go a little further each day. I think it's always a good thing to reach out and see if there are ways or treatments you can do to help with your current health problems. Each of us are unique and there just maybe that one thing out there that will help. I have resigned myself to never being able to run but then I couldn't run very fast even as a kid. Now I'm the guy you want to be with if a bear is chasing you. All you have to do is outrun me which is not too hard to do. ☺

Do you have any hobbies that you enjoy that you can do? I like taking pictures of critters out of my window in the room where I have computer. Took this one yesterday - squirrel jumped on my bird feeder and ate most of a large bird seed wheel.

Hoping you have a pain free rest of the week.

John

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Yes I try to keep an 'Attitude of Gratitude' I still have so many things to be grateful for, my loving family and friends. No one wants to be with anyone who complains all the time.

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@keeptrying

I think that it can be healthy to have times of solitude. My wife and I live out in the country, and most days don't see another person. When weather and health permit, I'm outside in the yard and gardens. No one bothers me then. Generally, I feel better about life during those times. My service dog is never far away from me for very long. She always comes to check on me, and sometimes will lie in the grass and watch me.

I think I know myself enough to know that it's helpful to me to reach out to others. I visit a woman who just celebrated her 104th birthday. I don't know which of us looks forward to those weekly visits more. She's a treasure trove of interesting experiences. She loves that I can look up events and locations on my phone.

Lots of people don't like to be alone. They are happiest in a group of people. Not I.

I say, enjoy your alone time while you can.

Jim

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@jimhd I much prefer being alone and so enjoy playing in the dirt. Don't have much dirt to play in, but make the most of what little I do have. Amazing how much can be packed into a small place with some know-how. Always enjoyed landscape and design. Those days are gone. I miss having room to roam. I also know it is no longer realistic. Still adjusting :(. A Test for sure.

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I don't remember who is credited with saying it before Clint Eastwood, but one has to know their limitations. I believe it is fine to know your comfort zone and if opportunities arise that allow you to enlarge it a bit and you are able to take them, that is perfectly fine. If one attempts to do something or yearn for something that is simply no longer possible, then it may be time to mourn that friend and move on. Before I was diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis, I was at the gym every morning at 5AM for 90 minutes and no longer am able to do that and I miss the workouts, and the friends I had there, but it is simply not going to happen in the same way again. I still try to workout at home when I am able and motivated, but that leaves out the friends part, but it is simply what I am able to do and I accept that. I don't think that is the same as "giving up".

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@parus

@jimhd I much prefer being alone and so enjoy playing in the dirt. Don't have much dirt to play in, but make the most of what little I do have. Amazing how much can be packed into a small place with some know-how. Always enjoyed landscape and design. Those days are gone. I miss having room to roam. I also know it is no longer realistic. Still adjusting :(. A Test for sure.

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The "room to roam " part of what you wrote Sums it up brilliantly. Hiking Was My Peace. I Am Still Adjusting Too. Discovering That Photographing Nature, In All Its Forms, Is A Gift From God For Me.Thank You So So Much.

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Acceptance is not giving up. That is illuminating.

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@jimhd

@keeptrying

I think that it can be healthy to have times of solitude. My wife and I live out in the country, and most days don't see another person. When weather and health permit, I'm outside in the yard and gardens. No one bothers me then. Generally, I feel better about life during those times. My service dog is never far away from me for very long. She always comes to check on me, and sometimes will lie in the grass and watch me.

I think I know myself enough to know that it's helpful to me to reach out to others. I visit a woman who just celebrated her 104th birthday. I don't know which of us looks forward to those weekly visits more. She's a treasure trove of interesting experiences. She loves that I can look up events and locations on my phone.

Lots of people don't like to be alone. They are happiest in a group of people. Not I.

I say, enjoy your alone time while you can.

Jim

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@keeptrying Once again I find myself mulling over your current post wondering if I have a word for you? I'm not the type of person that wants to respond to everything that is out there. Sometimes I find that it is better to allow each of us the space to say something without even a response. That often signals a point in our journey where we feel brave enough to verbalize what is going on in our heart.

Here is what I sense I need to say. Never give up. Have Hope.
If we look around us there are so many hurting people who don't have this opportunity as we do on Connect to put out our words of asking for advice, sharing our concerns or simply feeling we are out of words.

Even under "normal circumstances" as we age there are things that we once engaged in that we find difficulty doing now. I know that is very true for me. I would rather dwell on the new season about to spring forward as I watch the days go by. New growth, children laughing, the hum of lawn movers. Change is afoot! I pray that today your focus get be on hope, loving others and allowing others to love you. Never give up! @thankful.

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@jimhd

@keeptrying

I think that it can be healthy to have times of solitude. My wife and I live out in the country, and most days don't see another person. When weather and health permit, I'm outside in the yard and gardens. No one bothers me then. Generally, I feel better about life during those times. My service dog is never far away from me for very long. She always comes to check on me, and sometimes will lie in the grass and watch me.

I think I know myself enough to know that it's helpful to me to reach out to others. I visit a woman who just celebrated her 104th birthday. I don't know which of us looks forward to those weekly visits more. She's a treasure trove of interesting experiences. She loves that I can look up events and locations on my phone.

Lots of people don't like to be alone. They are happiest in a group of people. Not I.

I say, enjoy your alone time while you can.

Jim

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@thankful Beautifully written. Far to easy to lose what is in the present bemoaning the things we cannot do. To reverie in the past means not moving forward-even if not as quickly as we once did.

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