Talking Frankly about Living with Advanced Cancer

Posted by Colleen Young, Connect Director @colleenyoung, Sep 1, 2017

Are you living with advanced cancer (sometimes referred to as stage 4 or metastatic cancer)?
This discussion is a safe space where you can connect with others to talk about the realities of living with limited time. It's not easy to find people who understand what it is like. For many reasons, you may not feel comfortable talking about your thoughts and emotions with friends or family. Perhaps you are alone. Even if you are surrounded by people who support you, you may experience intense loneliness.

Connect is a place where honest conversation can safely take place. You can speak frankly and be heard without judgement. I invite you to share your reality facing death and living now.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Cancer Support Group.

testlady | @testlady | Sep 2, 2017

Six years and counting! I walk around with a smile and a positive attitude only to know that the true me is encircled by a fog that will not lift. I see a psychologist weekly, but it does not lift the fog of inevitability. I am afraid.

Tresjur | @tresjur | Sep 1, 2017

I remember reading “a cancer diagnosis is a reminder of our mortality” in the book But You Look So Good – Stories by Carcinoid Cancer Survivors and for me no statement is more true.

I no longer work, but I would if I could. Managing my many health issues, along with helping my spouse to manage his, is just as time consuming as a full-time job. Along with cancer, I have heart disease and the probability of a stroke looming in the background. So, I'm dealing with three health issues whereas most people would be intimidated with one of the three.

On the physical level I keep all my appointments, never miss a test or treatment and search for ways that others handle these conditions. On a mental level I tell myself that things could be worse (true). I still have long-time friends in my life, some as far back at 60 years that I keep current with. I have amazing new friends that I also treasure and spend time with them when I can. My family, though small, is an important factor and knowing they are there keeps me upbeat and positive.

Staying optimistic, looking at the glass as half-full, avoiding stress, helping others, scrapbooking, support group, reminiscing over pleasant memories, and praying – these things help me to cope with advanced cancer and my other health issues.

Mary

Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Sep 1, 2017

I'm glad that you posted this discussion, Colleen. As I've had three surgeries for neuroendocrine tumors, a rare form of cancer, I've found myself wanting to look positively at the future, but with a cautious-eye on the reality of three occurrences. While I keep active, and I volunteer, work and maintain friendships, the reality of cancer is always there. I find myself still searching for answers and still trying to live a normal life. It really is a different reality from my life prior to cancer.

I would love to hear from others who are living with this dilemma. How are you balancing the different feelings of optimism and the reality of a cancer diagnosis?

Teresa