Connect
Someone to listen and empathize to help talk through a tragedy
I'm in a family crisis my spouse and I have 6 children have been together for 20+ years we're 36 years old this year I had reasons to believe that she was having an affair over time I found proof and very descriptive emails and texts that broke me down to me believing there was nothing left for me in this world I've struggled to manage and bottle any and everything but I'm not able to any more I can't leave and lose my family please I need a blessing I'm asking for a blessing for someone who I can just vent to let everything I have held in just to keep them close to me which only in the end hurt and destroyed every bit of confidence and pride I ever had please help me to understand that I don't have to carry all the weight and hurt please and thank you
Like
Helpful
HugInterested in more discussions like this? Go to the Just Want to Talk Support Group.
Connect
Hi Parkerbear,
It was nice to hear from you! Considering your unfortunate situation, what ages are your 6 children? Also are they aware that there is anything wrong between you and your wife? Your children might be the best place for you to think about when considering what, if anything you are going to do regarding your situation.
Also it might be helpful for you to try and ignore the present sad situation and start thinking about the future and your economic status. You are 36 but you will be in your 60's before you know it. Time goes fast. Now is a good time to focus on your job or career and possibly if you can, invest or save for the future when you will be retiring. Prices are only going to continue to go up. You will want to be prepared.
Prayer always helps when we have a crisis and even when we don't. God is there for us. We just have to ask.
I hope things start to work out better for you.
PML
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 ReactionI suggest finding some kind of meeting. I attend AA. There are meetings like CODA that you might find helpful and find people of like mind that you could form friendships.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsWhat you are going through is not unusual. Especially in the situation you mention. Your wife obviously has lived under a great deal of stress with six children, and you met at a young age. What you believe about the situation may not be reality. You say she denies the affair. Are you so certain she is guilty. Maybe you can think back to earlier times when you and your wife shared some joyful moments, the births of your children, etc. Does she attend church? Women love romance, flowers, etc. Even if she had an "affair" it is not necessarily the end of the world. With six children and a 20 year relationship, you obviously have much in common in your mutual history. Be honest, be gentle, talk to her about your belief and how much it hurts you. Have you tried that yet? All have sinned and come short of the glory of God. Get some counseling. Maybe they can help you handle whatever is to come. But for now, try to calm down, think about your children and marriage, show as much love and understanding as you can under the circumstances, and there may be hope. You both have much to lose with six children. What more can you tell us about the marriage and its history? Why specifically do you "believe'" she is actually having a physical affair? Has she shown any changes in her affection toward you? Tell us more so we can discuss this rationally and possibly provide more informed advice. Simply confronting here in a hostile and accusatory manner is not wise. That alone would lead to her avoiding you. What has made her happy in the past?
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 Reactions