1. < Mental Health

schizoid personality disorder and my husband

Posted by tamsuperstar @tamsuperstar, Nov 16, 2011

Anyone have a husband that has spd? I would like to chat with you. I am battling this disorder with my husband and it ain't pretty.

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Native Floridian | @nativefloridian | Nov 17, 2011

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

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7 replies
tamsuperstar | @tamsuperstar | Nov 17, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

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Well, he agreed to make an apt for a psychologist tomorrow...We will see if he will follow through. Is it helping your husband? Can you share what symptoms your husband has? I can share anything with you about mine to help you. My husband is so set in his ways that he won't listen to anyone's advice. I told him yesterday that I couldn't take much more of his being a hermit. He has divorced me emotionally. He goes to the bedroom every evening when he gets home from work and stays there. He has no interaction with me, hardly at all. No hugging, kissing, or any kind of intimacy. Can't take much more of this. It's gotten worse, lately.

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Native Floridian | @nativefloridian | Nov 19, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

Jump to this post

Here's a helpful website: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001918 The recommendation of not making demands for emotional intimacy is a good one. I find that my husband is less likely to become a hermit if I am positive, kind and loving. If he thinks I disapprove of his behavior he becomes a hermit for weeks at a time (when he is not at work). Marriage counseling with a psychologist is helping us because my husband is most likely to want to live alone when we disagree too much. The counselor is helping us to change our patterns of communication, 5 positive comments for every 1 'problem' we need to discuss and resolve (like kids being too loud late at night or dogs waking him up). Is your husband critical of you when he does talk to you? If so, I would back off and let a good therapist help both of you. Hope it gets better soon. It is not easy to live with a hermit.

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tamsuperstar | @tamsuperstar | Nov 22, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

Jump to this post

my husband is very critical of me all the time.. drives me nuts and turns me off to him altogether. I am trying to get him to go to counseling. The doctor put him on Abilify..but, it was $100..and we didn't have it...and that is with insurance...sucks..now,, were back to square one again.

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tamsuperstar | @tamsuperstar | Nov 22, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

Jump to this post

my husband is very critical of me all the time.. drives me nuts and turns me off to him altogether. I am trying to get him to go to counseling. The doctor put him on Abilify..but, it was $100..and we didn't have it...and that is with insurance...sucks..now,, were back to square one again.

REPLY
Native Floridian | @nativefloridian | Nov 25, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

Jump to this post

I have not heard good things about Abilify. Why did the doctor prescribe it? The critical remarks are a bad habit and a good marriage counselor can teach your husband to stop that behavior. It is a pattern of poor behavior that results in nothing but distance between two married people. For every 5 good things, maybe 1 criticism can be handled by most people. Husbands that do nothing but critique their wives need to be locked up together, in my opinion.

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DELIA SANDERSON | @deliasanderson | Nov 26, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

Jump to this post

know that the critical nature is his problem and not yours and you just use your energy in liking and being who you are

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tamsuperstar | @tamsuperstar | Nov 28, 2011
In reply to @nativefloridian "I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs..." + (show)
@nativefloridian

I am not really sure if my husband has this disorder but he does exhibit signs of some sort of personality problem that is intermittent. Will your husband go to see a therapist or doctor of psychology? Mine is doing that, although, sometimes he is noncompliant with doctors. If he is spd it is avoidant type. That is best since he is less aggressive than some people with personality disorders.

Jump to this post

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

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santy | @santy | Mar 25 4:42pm

It has been 13 years since this was posted but i find myself in this position. I think my husband of 3 months has spd and i don't know how to deal with it. Besides counselling, which will take a whole lot of convincing, are there things i can do to help? Anything that helped in your case?

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Mentor
Helen, Volunteer Mentor | @naturegirl5 | Mar 25 7:40pm

@santy. How long did you know your husband before you were married and how old is he? What symptoms is he showing and what concerns you the most? Has he been diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder by a psychologist (Ph.D. or Psy.D in clinical psychology) or psychiatrist (M.D. with speciality in psychiatry) ? These are the mental health professionals who have the training and skills in diagnosis and are best suited for the diagnosis of personality disorders.

You may have already done some searches but I thought I would share information from reliable and valid websites.

Cleveland Clinic: Schizoid Personality Disorder

-- https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/23030-schizoid-personality-disorder

Mayo Clinic: Schizoid Personality Disorder

-- https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/schizoid-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20354414

American Psychiatric Association: What are personality disorders

-- https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/personality-disorders/what-are-personality-disorders

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