~ Being Married to a Narcissist ~

Posted by Barb @amberpep, Aug 15, 2017

Hi everyone ..... some of you may remember that I was married to a man with NPD for 40 years .... I divorced him 12 years ago after the kids were no longer at home. After getting passed that point where I felt "I hate you, I'd like to cut your mouth off," and all those things we think about when we're in the midst of a divorce, we do fine when in the company of our kids and their spouses. I moved this passed weekend and all my kids and the 2 that are married had their spouses with them all pitched in to help. While we were in the midst of the move, in walks my X husband. He came to help hook up all the electronic equipment. I was not really surprised because it made him look good and again placed him in the center of the family (or so he thought). Oh, he was soooooo very nice to everyone, including me. I don't know how much the kids perceive this, but it's as if you're watching a shadow of a person going through his "nice" behavior ..... all to make everyone thing how wonderful he is.
As my therapist once told me, narcissists don't change ..... it's never their problem, always someone elses.
And, may I add ...... never, ever, trust one ..... a wolf in sheeps clothing.
abby

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Mental Health Support Group.

Parus | @parus | Dec 17, 2017

@amberpep I had numerous journals and trashed every last one of them. Also wrote lots of poetry-Parus Allen Poe sums it up. I still have some remaining. After many moves most things were lost. My youngest sister asked for copies of some of my poetry and I obliged by making her a book with my own illustrations for some of them. I presume she still has it even though she told me the poems did not make sense to her and she did not read them. It was the thought that counted. As for the illustrations they were too toxic for her. Any thing negative is toxic-Me thinketh she has read too many self help books. She means well. She lives in the upper echelon of society where la-la land reigns supreme. I am thankful for her even though I could not live as she does nor vice versa. Not criticizing her lifestyle. She is happy and I am happy for her. I was our mother's scapegoat and whipping girl (gee mom, I am sorry I was not Shirley Temple). This happens and I am stronger in some ways. I can remind myself of where I used to be. I can say I have made progress. I still have struggles and slip back to the bottom of the vortex. More like I get sucked back into thus. It is a lot of work!!!