New nodule and the unknown

We're here to read your vents! Many of us have experienced this ourselves and totally get what your feeling.

When I find myself starting down the rabbit hole of the 'scary what ifs', I use simple meditation techniques to bring myself back to the present. The simplest being to select an object in front of me and ask myself questions about its feel and texture.

I definitely identify with what you're feeling. In some weird way, having bad news can feel better than the "purgatory" state of not knowing, which can seem endless.

Like @denzie, I try to meditate to get out of the worried state of mind. I do find meditating hard. I sometimes use the Happier phone app for help with this.

The other thing I do is overeat which also helps but just for a little while. 🙂

Morning! Dragonspark- Any of us that have gone through Cancer surgery or Radiation, Chemo , etc., truly understand your fears! I think I speak for most when I say that every time we get a scan there is nervousness and fear of a new found nodule or mass. I just had my latest 6 month scan (2 year mark) and I try to think really positive but the worry is still there. The scan itself came back that there was a nodule, but then the report said there was nothing new and no new nodules. I’m choosing to go with the report, at least until my doctor’s appointment this Monday. I know they will have had an oncologist, pulmonologist, or Specialist review the scans before they say it is or isn’t a growing nodule or cancerous. I, like you, had some kind of “bug” that made lots of mucous and sneezing and coughing about 2 weeks before my CT scan. It was also at the point where mu surgery line is. Can also be scar tissue. I also choose not to let the worrying get out of hand, because there is, honestly, nothing I can do about it. Worrying will only distract me from living my life and enjoying the now. Even if there is something there, just be relieved that it’s been “caught” and now it will be monitored and taken care of IF it is something. Hoping to ease your mind, and I pray God Blesses you!🙏

Hi Dragonspark,
I was diagnosed stage 4 nsc cancer in September 2023. I have a c t scan every 6 or 12 weeks. I am always sad the days before because I just don’t know what will be found and if my meds will be changed. It’s the unknowns that are so difficult. I try to be positive too, so grateful for medical care. I wanted to let you know you are not alone.

@dragonspark, it's not unusual to imagine the worst, and once you're diagnosed with lung cancer, the worst is pretty bad! However, like most things, time gives perspective. I had my upper right lobectomy in 2018, where they found that my original cyst had metastasized to a nearby lymph node. I have the EGFR Exon 19 mutation, but at that time, Tagrisso was not approved for first-line use.

That changed 2 years later when my lung cancer (LC) metastasized to my brain. I had brain surgery followed by four rounds of radiation, and started taking Tagrisso then. That was in December 2020. Since then, I've had a brain MRI, PET or CT scan, and bloodwork every 3 months. Along the way, my doctors have seen several new nodules, sometimes causing another PET scan. They all turned out benign, and most disappeared or grew much smaller by the following scan.

My dad always told me that Midwesterners never worry about what hasn't happened yet. Decades later, I've learned that's certainly not true for all Midwesterners! lol As far as I'm concerned, until my doctors tell me that I have cancer again, I don't have cancer. I agree with dad that life is too short to worry about imaginary events. Maybe that's something he learned in his 22 years of military service.

I would also go on about the medical studies showing that a positive attitude improves medical results, but you get the idea. I wish you all the best, including peace and long life.

Thank you all for your helpful comments! I know I’ll get through this. Coming here and having you all to vent to helps. Wishing you all a life full of meaning and love.

@dragonspark, You're right, it does stink! It's stinks that we live our lives between scan appointments. Sometimes I can even become somewhat desensitized to the recurring process until something changes, like a new nodule. Oh, the rollercoaster.
You mentioned flu, and you know how sensitive our lungs can be, and how they can overreact to many things. Three-ish years after I was diagnosed, I had a new nodule which turned out to be fungal. It's not always cancer.
Hopefully your nodule has resolved before your next scan. Hugs.