My Approach to ECT Amnesia

Posted by ettrick @ettrick, Feb 7, 2023

I know that ECT is often feared and misunderstood because of the potential side effects, amnesia among them.

When I took some time to reflect upon my experience with ECT and the resultant amnesia I realised I could shape the view I had. I first started calling lost memories my memory holes because I had learnt that with focus I could sometimes refill them.

At some point I saw my perspective on life change in that I was not dwelling on my past but relishing my present instead. At the same time I was looking forward to the future with hope thanks to ECT.

I wanted to pull this all together and so I created an image in my mind of where I was in life relative to ECT and amnesia. I see myself standing at the edge of a field beyond which are forested hills and mountains. In the field are numerous holes. However, the holes don’t matter because while they’re there, they don’t impede my view.

I believe that having a positive attitude like this regarding ECT and amnesia has made it easier to attend treatments and see success.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Mental Health Support Group.

julesabryant1 | @julesabryant1 | Jan 20 6:32pm

I'm glad you have found a way to be positive about your amnesia. I don't have holes in my memory I lost about 90% of 40 years. What is left is fuzzy. My last shock was 5 years ago, I still struggle to make memories. The ones I do make are fuzzy. It's not just about the memories you loose, the lost history that destroys relationships It's also not knowing what you don't know that scares me. I have learned of awful things I forgot happened, I worry what else I don't know about. I did not have good results with ECT. It did not help my bipolar. My depression worsened, had more manic episodes, started hallucinating and became delusional. I have since been diagnosed with Major NeuroCognitive Disorder. I don't want to get into the cognitive impairment because this is about amnesia. I lost my sense of self. I grieve her even though I don't remember her.