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Looking for tips handling toileting needs for wheelchair bound

Posted by jzs @jzs, Sep 30, 2023

New here and not sure this is the right group. My husband is a cancer patient, 3 years remission. He has extensive nerve damage of undiagnosed source and cannot walk or stand. Long appointments for multiple scans etc, are a nightmare to plan since he cannot go to the restroom by himself and I am not strong enough to hold him up. I wonder how other care givers handle this. Depending on adult diapers seems less than ideal. I guess I am looking for a magical solution. Thanks for any helpful ideas.

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bunnybear | @bunnybear | Oct 4, 2023
In reply to @lacy2 "Reading the above and sympathize - I thought my situation was bad but being in a..." + (show)
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Reading the above and sympathize - I thought my situation was bad but being in a wheelchair and having to use washroom never occurred to me how difficult it would be. I had radiation damage to bowel then IbsD and then 2018/19 too many antibiotics or utis and c.diff and since then fecal incontinence.... stools are “mushy” and clean up is a task and I rarely go out, shop etc. Also get a lot of UTI’s have one at present but hard to keep area soil-free! And glad we have washer and dryer...but reading how much harder it is and would be, being in a wheelchair, or paralyzed!! What worries me is the future and if moved to a home for aged or such and lying in excrement until the next shift of nurses aides - reading a story of a man left for hours - the aides were fired but in their defence they were swamped with the number of other patients/residents needing help. We still have to eat so we still have to poop - and disposable underwear may sop up urine incontinence it doesn't work for fecal - also the smell, the mess, the cleanup - no magic solution for sure and although I feel upset for myself (and have other illnesses) I feel very much for those in wheelchairs or unable to even clean themselves... I never gave that a thought, sorry. (My daughter has an automatic toilet, with water spray etc but as a person with a vaginal and with frequent bladder infections I am concerned about, and have read about, the water spraying fecal germs into those areas for a woman..... ???

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@lacy2 About your concerns about increased bladder infections if you use a bidet. I worry about that also , so I simply don’t use the washer that sprays this area.
@harley22 I have both one of those expensive toilet seats and one of the cheap little models they sell on Amazon. The cheap one washes better when using on the rear b/c of the increased water pressure it allows. However you MUST adjust the pressure on these by turning the back nozzle that says something like “ self cleaning nozzle”. For some reason it adjusts the water pressure too, so that you don’t get terribly high pressure. I’ve been using these for years and just found this out! As for the expensive bidets, I just find that the water pressure is too weak for effective cleaning on the two models I have used though the hotter water helps and they are wonderfully comfortable! Perhaps there is something I don’t know about these expensive models, but in my experience, they both seem to only allow only a weak water pressure.

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carolann1952 | @carolann1952 | Oct 11, 2023

I have inexpensive bidet attachment to my toilet. Works like kitchen sprayer but is angled. Attached to bottom of tank where water hooks up. Sprays from front to back- cool water. I find mine a blessing for keeping clean.

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kevincalljames | @kevincalljames | Jan 25 2:22pm

@kevincall I would go into my grandmother bedroom and close the door and bring her insulin shot and empty her catheter bag into a bottle and change her diaper and clean her butt and give her medicine and bring her breakfast into her bedroom and let her eat her breakfast and slide her board under her ass and put her on her wheelchair girl and take her to the bathroom and lift her on the toilet and let her do her business on the toilet and lift her so I can wipe her butt off with toilet paper and take her clothes off and lift her on her wheelchair girl and lift her in the bathtub and lower her down and wash her private parts off with a clean towel and dry her body off with a towel and put her back on her wheelchair girl and get her dress up and brush her teeth with tooth paste and brush her hair and bring her back into the living room and take her outside and watch the birds and bring her back inside the house and watch tv and give her a shot of insulin and empty her bladder and give her lunch and let her eat and push her back into her bedroom and closed the door and push her into the bathroom and lift her on the toilet and let her do her business and wipe her ass off with toilet paper and lift her back on her wheelchair girl and put her into her bed room and lift her on her bed and let her sleep naked and cover her up and let her sleep

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jenatsky | @jenatsky | Feb 1 8:38pm

Since your husband is WC bound and cannot leave his home without help he would be considered home bound and eligible for home care assistance. This would include OT and PT which can help you develop safe methods to care for your husband. You don’t need to do it alone and better to learn from knowledgeable people.

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