Husband left hospital against medical advice (AMA): Any thoughts?

Posted by denise96 @denise96, Dec 19, 2024

My husband was admitted to the hospital Dec 15, 2024, for respiratory distress and was unresponsive. He was to stay until today but yesterday he called me to come get him. Said he signed a AMA and wanted out as soon as possible. So I went and sprung him from the hospital..All though I hate to say this, the reason I believe he wanted to come home was because they were only giving him 5 mg of oxycodone while he was used to taking 80 mg of oxycodone and 20 of xtampa which is oxycontin er9. When I had asked him at the hospital the first day if he was in pain, he told me no. My husband has been an opiate addict for years. when I met him in 1997, he was clean but did drink alot. Then in 2008, he had neck surgery and was put on oxycodone for pain. Of course, he became addicted. He normally would take more than prescribed. Made for a stressful marriage. He was diagnosed with late stage iv lung cancer in september this year and has advanced copd. Is he in pain? Yes, I am sure he is. But, now that I know he rested comfortably in the hospital on 5 mg, I wonder how much pain he is really in at this point. He has built up such a tolerance for opoids that I worry that when and if his pain becomes worse, will more pain pills even give him release. The palliative care team knows how much he takes. They are the ones who began the oxycontin er9 in addition to the 80 mg of oxycodone he has already been taking. No, I sure don't want him to suffer but I guess if taking so many opiates makes him happy, who am I to be concerned. But I worry about him. I may have to quit my part time job as when he is on these pills he does things like light his cigarettes and then nods off and drops them. Yesterday, he lost one in his recliner. I could not find it and hoped it went out. It evidently did. He makes coffee and forgets to put the coffee cup under the keurig and it runs all over the place. He talks non stop to himself or me. I am afraid if I go to work, he may end up burning the house down with him and the dogs in it. I only work part time, but it is a release for me, but I am not sure what to do. I need to let my employer know today. Any thoughts or advice would be so helpful. Thanks.

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Call the oncology social worker and call a hospice team. Maybe call your employer and tell them you're waiting for the hospice intake and you can't leave until you've spoken to them.

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@denzie

Call the oncology social worker and call a hospice team. Maybe call your employer and tell them you're waiting for the hospice intake and you can't leave until you've spoken to them.

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Yesterday I talked to his oncology nurse and told her about the situation. She told me to talk to the palliative care doctor. I did talk to my employer and she said it was ok if I took next week off also. I only work part time at a grocery store and it is no big deal if I miss. They have enough people to fill in. None of the doctors have suggested hospice at this time, although I think it would be a good idea. Once he goes back to sleep, I will make some more phone calls. Thanks for your help.

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I'm so sorry you are facing such challenges. I hope the doctors will recommend hospice care.

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