I'm going to be sad the rest of my life.

Can you walk with her outdoors sometimes? Do you have a friend you can confide in? Can you get yourself some more time by maybe using a grocery delivery service or something similar? Can you join a club for a couple hours a week? I'm just throwing out ideas here--I don't know if any of them will fit your situation.

You might also look into talking with a therapist. I swallowed my pride and did it during my cancer treatment and it was amazingly helpful.

Thanks for the response and the suggestions. I have talked to a therapist but, you know...you play the hand you're dealt.

Everyone, literally everyone, who's been married for half a century or more faces something similar, unless they're lucky enough to die together in a plane crash when they're eighty. It's just that some days are better than others.

Can you tell her you love her? Can you have a date night? Do you have a shared hobby? How about exercising with her? Sounds like she is trying very hard with all that walking. Have you thought of going for counseling for yourself? It could really help you with support for yourself.

Hi,
I'm sorry to hear about your wife being so ill and how hard it is for you to manage everything besides being concerned about her. That must be very hard on you. I went through something similar. My husband had lung cancer for 14 years. We were married 30 years. Towards the last year of his life; (He died last July.) my husband could do none of the things he had always done; repairing items in our home, yard work, carpentry work, taking the garbage down etc. It was very hard on both of us. I ended up doing everything including getting up three times a night to get him his nebulizer because he would have terrible breathless episodes. However, what did help us was telling each other how much we loved each other and praying together. We asked God for help and we got help from God. My husband died but with very little pain. That was a prayer answered. I am alone now, no family or friends. They have all died but I still have God and he still answers my prayers.

Let some of the household chores go and walk with your wife. Tell her how much you love her while you still can. I'm so glad now that my husband and I had that time together. You will get through this time. You sound like you are a very caring, loving husband. Just talk to God like he is your best friend and he is. It's also important to keep in mind that it is only God who decides who dies and when. We think we know when someone may die because of their health but we really don't. So enjoy this time with your wife while you have it. I'll say a prayer for you both.
I wish you the best!
PML

Your pain is understandable. There are many roads we must travel through this life, some of them happy and carefree; some of them miserable.

This is temporary. Yes, you may lose your best friend and my heart goes out to you as I know it will be a huge struggle and ordeal. But you will get through it, many have done it before you and you will be able to bear whatever comes.

Then you will come out the other side. When one door closes many can open.

Look in a mirror, give yourself a hug: from me to you. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

I totally understand. My husband has inoperable chondrosacroma of the skull cancer . He is going to endure very difficult radiation because his tumor is attached to his cartoid artery . I am very worried . We have been married over thirty years and I don’t want to loose my best friend .

Agree no one knows til they have walked in our shoes .

I watched my husband die inch by inch and cared for him throughout his horrible journey with chemo/pain etc. I never left his side. We did this for 10 months until he decided that he no longer wanted to eat or endure the pain. It helped that I was a nurse and could help manage his pain and give him the care he needed in our home. Perhaps you could "hire out" some of the daily tasks of housekeeping, cooking etc and be with her. I admire her tenacity as I too have a terminal lung condition and so wish that my husband of forty years could be with me. I pray every night for him to come get me, somehow he doesn't think I'm ready. Stay close to your wife, she needs your support!

Sounds like you have already lost her if she doesn't have enough time for you. Is there any kind of support group you could join during this sad time in your life? I mean a physical group where you can get hugs and perhaps find a friendship? Can you afford therapy? Grief is a part of being human, but it doesn't have to consume you. Are you able to get 6 to 8 hrs of sleep? If not, see your doctor and/or try various natural remedies on the net which may also help you raise your energy level to get your chores done. Good sleep is an absolute necessity to get through tough times. I care and will look here often if I can be of help. I am just a layman but have been able to get through very rough times.

You are showing such great love for your wife and it sounds like you are doing your best to care for her. It’s hard to focus during these times and sounds like you are already grieving. Try and see the importance of taking care of you during this time too. Try and find something each day that you can enjoy even for just a few minutes. Doesn’t have to be big, maybe just sitting outside for ten minutes. It’s normal to feel the way you do, your feelings are a reflection of your love. Hang on.🙂‍↕️