House Downsizing

Posted by tim1028 @tim1028, Aug 15, 2023

My wife and I are both seniors and plan to use a professional organizer to downsize our house, which is filled with 30 years of accumulated belongings. We live in a 1500 square foot single story house and do not plan to move in the immediate future. We are apprehensive about hiring someone to help us but felt stuck and unable to proceed on our own. Would anyone who has gone thru this process be willing to share your experience?

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@riana1

I love your tips provided! Very helpful and inspires self reflection.

We moved to a smaller house after my husband retired 2 years ago.

Everyday I wake up saying I am going to get rid of stuff still packed in boxes and things unpacked that I have not looked at for years. Guess what, as we use to say as kids, “Chicken Butt” lol, I never go through with it.

My husband ask often when will I start getting rid of my stuff. I always reply, “Don’t worry about my stuff get rid of yours.” (Sassy Sarcasm)

You know humans accumulate things over the years because at the earlier seasons of our lives those things were useful serving their purposes at the time.

I read the Bible and for those who read the Bible or listened to religious programs will understand my next thought on my situation. (I am Not Advocating Religion just working things out to help me let go and move on. Use your own philosophical perspective.)

For me two scriptures come to mine. Exodus 20:3–6
You shall have no other gods before me.

and

1 John 5:21
Little children, keep yourselves from idols.

Looking deeper inside my heart today, I feel my circumstances mimicked one of the Ghost characters in the movie, “A Christmas Carol.”

The ghost of Jacob Marley said, "I wear the chain I forged in life. I made it link by link, and yard by yard; I girded it on of my own free will, and of my own free will I wore it.” (Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol)

Wow! So true to my life as it is now!!

I realize that I forged a chain of things I no longer use, need, or even want. The chain link is connected to my soul by a ball stemming from past feelings evoked by tenderness, nostalgia, sadness or happy memories and are weighing me down.

I don’t want to continue on this ball and chain journey weighing me down from moving forward.

I’m just standing still being a procrastinator living in complacency and complaining about how bad or unhappy I am surrounded by all this stuff. I’m not just affected by my ordeal but my beautiful husband also who have issues with clutter is suffering.

We are both in our sixties and we know that like all humans we will fly away to the other side one day.

So, the remaining days the God Lord gives us together needs to be unhindered, unfettered, and chain free from anything or anyone holding us back from living a loving, stress free, joyful and peaceful life within our means.

So, I will start today on my journey of healing of letting go of not just things but the past seasons of my life that cannot be relived and move forward in the future that never stops.

Today I choose to be a better me and enjoy God’s gift of life. I am so glad I am mentally free. I will be getting rid of things day by day until they are gone. I will sell some stuff and I am not waiting on kids to decide if and when they want something. They have good jobs to buy their hearts desires. There are poor and needy people who can use it.

Good bye material idols!!! God forgive me for making gods out of material things and human beings. 🙏

I apologize to anyone in advance who may be annoyed my lengthy soul searching reflections written in this comment.

“In all your getting get understanding,” as it does help us to make better informed decisions about our circumstances and lives.
I hope my purging will help someone today.

Happy Letting Go Everyone! 🍻

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Keep at it- just an hour a day will help you make progress. Be prepared for unexpected big emotions- I suddenly burst into tears when sorting out the big tablecloths used to cover the dining room table, with all the leaves in, for big family/friend dinners. All are grown and scattered, or in heaven. I called my SIL and cried, we reminisced till I felt better. Life goes on

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@centre

Keep at it- just an hour a day will help you make progress. Be prepared for unexpected big emotions- I suddenly burst into tears when sorting out the big tablecloths used to cover the dining room table, with all the leaves in, for big family/friend dinners. All are grown and scattered, or in heaven. I called my SIL and cried, we reminisced till I felt better. Life goes on

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Thank you for sharing about the emotions. I am all for tears 😭 as they cleanse the soul like a needed and welcome rain on a hot summer day. 🙏

Happy letting go! 🍻

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@marye2

This is outstanding!! I also have sold items that were important to me that the kids do not want, but it can get overwhelming if there is a lot.

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I do agree with being overwhelmed. Memories can be overwhelming sometimes and paralyze our moving forward in life.

Reflecting now on when we moved after my husband retired.
I remember asking my adult children if they wanted anything get it. They messed around in the pile picked out a few things saying they will get it later.

Later came and the first year when we did our first post retirement road trip to see them bringing a few boxes of their things.

You know what they said, “Mommy we don’t need it as we are working on keeping things to a minimum.” Though my Beautiful Husband rejected my wishes at first I had him haul the boxes back home because I was unable to let THEIR STUFF go. God bless my husband for putting up with my stupidity.

Looking back on that experience I realize that what was a treasure trove to me was just trash to them. I am now realizing I wanted them to treasure my memories when they are making their own memories to treasure.

So, good bye former children things that I made my treasures, its time for you to make someone else happy.

Another mental chain link broken! So, healing ❤️‍🩹

Yay, mental liberation is awesome. Thank you for sharing and liking my comment. Your response caused a reflective moment playing a part in my recovery from things mentally, physically, and relationally.

You rock and my husband and I are toasting to your happiness today.🍻

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Before hiring someone, I would see what the public library has to offer. Here is one book I can recommend: "Downsizing your home with style: living well in a smaller space"; by Lauri Ward

I can't remember the name of another book I found that was helpful , but I remember two of the main ideas, which did help. First, group like things. Second, organize by using banker's boxes, and label the contents.

After that first step, you can think about taking further action such as giving away items, donating to Goodwill, discarding items, or selling them on eBay. Craigslist can be a way to give away items.

When I discard things (which is rare) I like to take a picture and put a print out of the picture in a 3-ring binder so I can remember if needed.

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